Fed up of health anxiety : I’ve had HA since... - Anxiety Support

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Fed up of health anxiety

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo

I’ve had HA since 2001 since my grandpa passed away then it got worse in 2007 when my mum passed away to cancer and ever since I’ve had it mainly everyday and it’s tiring and overwhelming and what’s worse no matter what therapy I have or what I do I can’t shift it and the thoughts that I’ve got some terminal illness that the drs have missed. I’ve just had a sore on my head that I thought was bad I was left for 4 weeks went back and my dr now thinks it’s something called actinic keratosis!!! So I’ve googled it like a dope and it says nothing to worry about but can turn into skin cancer now I’ve made myself feel like crap again because I think it’s grown my husband says it hasn’t but I’m obsessed with checking it and what’s worse I’ve washed my hair and my scabs come off so I’m back to square one again...I know I’m doing this to myself I just can’t seem to stop thinking the worst all the time and I’ve had enough I’ve missed out on so much of my life

67 Replies
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Hi Nat last week you were overjoyed after your news now your back to normal i do feel for you. But you did say that it said on Google nothing to worry about.

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to ma65

I know @ma65

I’m doing this to myself all because my scab came off ?? When I googled it said nothing to worry about it’s quite common but can turn into skin cancer if it grows or goes gooey so I’m thinking it’s grown but my husband said it’s not.. just looking for something else to dwell on aren’t I just wish this HA would go away x

ma65
ma65 in reply to Natzsteveo

Soldier on nat your familiar with the routine by now. Your be ok.

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to ma65

I know thanks so much for your support means a lot

Nat x

ma65
ma65 in reply to Natzsteveo

No probs.

Dixie9326
Dixie9326 in reply to Natzsteveo

I’ve had over 50 actinic keratosis over the years..they use a freezing solution to zap them...they are as common as the common cold! Definitely nothing to worry about...:)😍

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to Dixie9326

thanks dixie I feel OK about it now

Hello Nat :-)

I have had HA from a child literally and as I have got older it has just got worse however I don't blame myself as there was no help and I mean no help when I was young , in fact you were even afraid to mention it for the fear of been locked up and even now I have fought for years to get the right support , have I got it or even been offered it no so I cannot even say if it has worked for me !

I suffer in silence to be honest , no one knows how really bad I am , this last few months my HA has at least had me believing I have at least three terminal illnesses and I don't have a life it is more an existence so I know how you feel , I am on my knees and have been a long time making it worse when I got that pneumonia leaving me with PTSD as if I needed anything else adding to my long list of issues

How come the Doc has said this now ?

Like the other reply I thought he was happy with the way it was healing and more or less said nothing to worry about

I will ask as well how are you managing to see you Doctor , do tell the secret as ours are keeping us at arms length which is not helping my HA , I know somethings can be dealt with via the phone but I feel they should be seeing us a little more especially after I was waiting for a long needed telephone call this week from mine to find out while she has been of she went to Croatia and now in quarantine for an extra week so my call has been put back to the 10th , so they won't see us because of covid but will get on a plane and go abroad !

What is a matter with your Doctor he gives you peace of mind and then takes it away , I could give him a peace of my mind !!!

I don't think you have cancer at all even though I know it will not help me saying that , I wonder could you get to see a skin specialist or as you can get out go to A&E tell them it is sore and you might see one there ( daft thought but just trying to get you that peace of mind somehow )

Here for you Nat , you will get through this even though it may feel unbearable b I know you will overcome this and you have friends that will do their best to help :-)

Take Care x

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to lulu-1

Means so much lulu and hA isn’t the best thing to have during a lockdown xx

lulu-1
lulu-1 in reply to Natzsteveo

No it isn't I 100% agree :-) x

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to lulu-1

Hope you’re not suffering too much babes xx

lulu-1
lulu-1 in reply to Natzsteveo

On my knees to be honest ! :-) x

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to lulu-1

Inbox me babes or put a post up let us support you you xxx

lulu-1
lulu-1 in reply to Natzsteveo

Will do :-) x

There is soo much I've wanted to do in my life. It really does not seem fair . It does not even matter if you lose all of your family or your friends along the way, like I did, or not. We will still suffer from something that is not real, yet, seems very real. Many people do suffer 24/7 from what we are only feeling temporarily. People are only human. What cruel force can make us suffer from what is not real, yet sometimes even cause us to laugh or feel better when we see this in others. I took to intense prayer and learned that not even Almighty God's promises to me could take away the fear of panic attacks and death, I am ashamed to say. Why or what reason could there possibly be for this? How are these awful experiences going to make us better people? Can they make us indeed more human than the average human? Are we not indeed better and so much stronger on a much deeper level? Why did God say, about Jesus, "This is my son with whom I am well-pleased? God knew Jesus was Divine and chose to suffer through very real human experiences, yet did not have to. Do we have that same Divine Spark in us, as panic attack sufferers, when we think about, or see suffering in this world? We take it into ourselves as Christ Jesus did. I think that makes us super humans and beloved by Almighty God, with Whom nothing is impossible.

Thanks 🙏

I’m not a god person I’m not saying I’m totally anti god I do believe in angels and I do believe in Jesus to a certain extent but I don’t pray since losing a lot of family and friends along the way I lost hope in anything I believe in.. but this is real and I don’t like living like this like yourself there’s so much I’ve wanted to do.. I’m glad you managed to find your way and you have made sense though and pointed out a very good theory about us as humans.. but I’m still waiting for my way of dealing with this horrible anxiety... thanks for this though

Hey lulu it was with great difficulty to get an appointment with a doctor but because it was a sore and I’d had it for 2 years then I had to go in so they could visually have a look that’s when the first dr told me it could be basal cell which scared me but learned it’s not that big of a deal apparently.. anyway dr told me to make a visit appointment to see him in 4 weeks which was Friday just gone I saw a different doctor and he said it’s scabbed over and nothing to worry about unless it’s changes in size or becomes bloody and gooey then to go back and have it taken out...but gets a phone call yesterday the doctor said he’s had a look at it again and he thinks it’s actinic keratosis and I asked him what is that he said apparently it comes with age and exposure to sun over the years with me being fair skinned and blue eyes I was primed to get these so are a lot of people but it’s normal but can go into cancer eventually so I read that and now I’m crappie again xx

Hey babe Why dont you just ask him to remove it anyway so that way you wont have the worry that maybe one day it could change somink to consider 🤷‍♀️ x

That’s exactly what I’ve been thinking to do ya know babes just to get rid of it but I’m petrified of hospitals 🏥 I’m such an idiot honestly..how’s you feeling babes xx

You might not need to go hospital alot of nurses at the doctors of do stuff like that my neighbour had her mole removed at the docs. If it was me i would just get it gone once n for all.

Yh im alright same as always worrying im ill with something other than what i was told lol x

Awww bless ya is it’s still happening??

Me you and lulu are a good trio ain’t we least we found each other through this nightmare we go through xx

Yp same shit every day but yh least i got u girls x

Always got us no matter what xx

I’m going to go back and get it removed though just to ease myself I think 🤔

Nat xx

Yes i would itl be a lil injection to numb it the they scrape it of honestly im a pussy aswell but it will help you ha x

lulu-1
lulu-1 in reply to Natzsteveo

O heck , do they know you suffer with HA !!!

I agree with Amanda go and get it removed , not that I think it is cancer at all or will turn out to be but because I know how HA is

OK maybe you are afraid of the Hospital I get that , I am afraid of just going out doors but I know you could do it and Nat just tell yourself that peace of mind it gone is worth that anxiety going and we will be with you all the way :-) x

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to lulu-1

I’ll ring the drs tomorrow get them to take it off sod it will be good to get less stress although I know my HA will find something else to dwell on

Nat xx

lulu-1
lulu-1 in reply to Natzsteveo

Let us know what they say :-) x

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to lulu-1

Yeh they know lulu 😘

lulu-1
lulu-1 in reply to Natzsteveo

Well why don't they think before they open their flipping mouths !

This is why I would rather suffer and wait to speak with one Doc that knows me well because they others well they just don't know and always make me feel worse :-( x

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to lulu-1

Exactly my point xx

Hi Nat Amanda,and Lulu can I join your HA friends forever?I have suffered from this plague most of my life and it has gotten worse as I have gone older,I won’t even go to the Drs because I am terrified of getting bad news and pushing me over the edge. I am on day 12 of sertraline and never felt so bad with insomnia,nausea ,palpitations and non stop crying Dr said all common side effects and to persevere with them It’s this site and people like yourselves help me get through each day .i have been shielding for 6 months and that has added to my anxiety not been able to go out and about,I have a chronic lung condition so have to be very aware of the dangers of this virus and I think like many people this has had a major effect on all of our lives so once again thank you for being here with your support take care and stay safe.

Of course you can the more the merrier anytime you want to talk moan be sad were here for you we understand how your feeling with the anxiety so please dont feel alone i mean it xxx

lulu-1
lulu-1 in reply to mydogs

Hello :-)

I know how you feel , I sit and worry what is wrong with me but to afraid to go to the Doctors in case they say there is , I know that feeling so you sit and worry more

You are brave taking the meds I even come with a med fear !!! to afraid to try them so well done you even though they are at the moment making you feel yuk but I do know these meds make you feel worse before you feel better so I hope you can keep going another couple of weeks just to give them a fair try , easy for me to say I know but harder when you are the one doing it

Of course you can be in our group , everyone that wants to be can get on board , we are here for each other so when you need to let it all out just shout :-) x

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to mydogs

You are part of us all pat we are here for you no matter what xxxx

mydogs
mydogs in reply to Natzsteveo

Thank you so much that means a lot to me xxx

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to mydogs

Always babes 😘 xx

If it helps, my Dad had a few actinic keratosis spots on his back and the doctor removed them in office by freezing them just as they would a wart. It took 2 or 3 treatments but afterwards, they dried up and scabbed over and when the scab came off, they never came back. Just wanted to let you know that no hospital stay was needed. ♥️

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to Lm92

hi lm92

Thanks so much for this it really helps me massively

Nat xx

i know what you mean about HA i have it too had it for years i always think i have a terminal illness no matter what it's a paralyzing fear and stops you from living no matter what you do it still stays there i used to think i was the only one with it and that i was crazy people who don't have this fear can't possibly understand what we go through it helps me to read about other people's experiences with this it makes me feel so not all alone

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to fib4

you're not alone babes 😘

Xx

Beautiful Nat ❤️❤️❤️ x

thanks babes xxx

The wicked witch has been removed!

there is a god lol 😆 🙌 xx

Hi, just wanted to add, I had one of those keratoses on my leg. Dermatologist said, "oh we'll just remove it right now". I freaked. What? No preparation? No time to obsess and worry? I almost passed out. Anyway, he put a light bit of liquid anesthetic, waited, and then froze it right away. It didn't even hurt. I did, however, give myself bruises where I held my skin on my leg so hard from fear. THAT hurt. LOL

lulu-1
lulu-1 in reply to Always-frozen

Hello :-)

You made me laugh when you said no time to panic or worry :-o that is just what my head would have said to :-) x

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to lulu-1

that made me chuckle too lulu xxx

lulu-1
lulu-1 in reply to Natzsteveo

My way of thinking , something happened similar to me with something else , I was not as brave though I actually said I will have to go away and think about it , 2 years later I still am thinking about it :-D x

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to lulu-1

yes so true lulu xx

You made me chuckle at no time to worry about it thats so true isnt it ya lime "what hang on wait 😉 thanks so much for the reassurance im just goi g to get it removed and be done with thanks alot

Nat xx

Agora1
Agora1 in reply to Always-frozen

Hi Always-frozen, best way to do it for us lol

I had something removed (didn't even know what it was)

Doctor said same thing "oh we'll just remove it right now" Huh??

Before I could disagree, it was done and over with. :) xx

I too am so fed up of living with this. I've had it for 65 years now and going through a particularly bad patch at the moment.....well I hope that is what it is...!!!!....my mind will just not accept that my symptoms are anxiety related...and of course I can't get rid of them. They just get worse.

I get the all clear from one thing and immediately think I have caused a cancer of another kind through the stress I have put my body through.

I am convinced anxiety is what caused my beast cancer years ago.

My doctor says he wants to see me even though all the blood tests for the symptoms I have described have turned out completely clear of anything to worry about and he is prepared to repeat all the tests if I think it will help.....( although tha t did happen with my husband who died from lung cancer 4 months after being told there was nothing sinister in his 3 x rays or bloods)...

.......but I am just too scared to go........ and I even turn my phone off so that he can't get in touch with me again.

I know I just have to keep facing it all out until they find something but once they have told you there is no way out of the fear journey and I can't make myself face it.

Sorry to sound off but I know you will understand.

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to GJRWS

Aww GJRWS

My heart literally goes out to you wow you have been through it havent you. Im so sorry for youre loss that must of been incredibly hard to go through that and go through it yourself too

I'm glad you have a decent dr mine just does nothing at all i have to keep asking for tests..

But you've actually had to face cancer yourself ive heard anxiety can bring on certain things my dr told me that I thought he was just trying g to calm me down...

Have you managed to see a bereavement Councillor?? They helped me loads when I lost my mum and son 💔 but the health anxiety is my toughest yet

Nat xx

GJRWS
GJRWS in reply to Natzsteveo

Thanks for the reply, yes I am lucky with my doctor. He refuses to answer my queries by e mail (which I would prefer as I am then in more control of when I look at them.....always dread communicating with him as I constantly expect him to tell me something bad ) and he rings me up about every two weeks at the moment. Trouble is I have got to dread the phone ringing!!!! I have tried councillors on several occasions in my life.....and CBT and mindfulness but unfortunately have not found them helpful.

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to GJRWS

The trouble with cbt and other therapy is I feel they not long enough we need a lot more that 6 sessions to build up a tolerance to this..you’re bound to of developed a fear of the phone because you’re dreading the worst so it’s only natural your going to feel that way..know you’re not at all alone in this we are all here for you...have you heard of a charity run therapy called “cruse bereavement “? Xx

GJRWS
GJRWS in reply to Natzsteveo

Thank you..no ill Google it!!

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to GJRWS

They are brilliant it’s a self referral it lasts for about 7/8 sessions but if you need more you can it helped me massively and the fact these do this volunteer makes it work that bit more

Hi Natz, can you tell me what HA is? Does that stand for high anxiety? Thank you.

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to AliceAnne

health anxiety sweetheart x

AliceAnne
AliceAnne in reply to Natzsteveo

Oh OK, thank you sweety. I hope you're having an anxiety-free day! xo

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to AliceAnne

trying to keep positive today but I've had my granddaughter visit so shes kept me busy bless her otherwise I would of more than likely had a terrible day..hows you're day been xx

AliceAnne
AliceAnne in reply to Natzsteveo

Glad you had your granddaughter visit, she must have kept you busy and preoccupied. I had a day full of despair, didn't take a shower because I didn't have the energy.

Natzsteveo
Natzsteveo in reply to AliceAnne

don't worry about that when you're in despair you don't always feel like a shower have one when you feel up to it sweetie 😘

Nat xx

AliceAnne
AliceAnne in reply to Natzsteveo

Thank you for your kindness, Natz! It means a lot to me. xo

Hi 👋 natz you sound so humble and sweet my mom just passed away also I have been a praying man and yes this hurts most of all back from May she had stage 4 lung cancer I told mom we’re going to beat this in prayer timing was very bad as she was coughing for a good 5 months and they said it was bronchitis very poor analysis after having COPD and in September of 2019 wheezing yes it is very sad 😢 to see your loved ones Go right before it hurts Thank God for Eternal life as God promised mom lived Jesus as we all have recived the Gift as John 3:16 promises He Gave his only begotten Son so that we would have eternal life Death is for sure But he took the sin so we wouldn’t have to be separated you can reach me any time ok I’m here to talk I hope you feel better Keep praying ok lost mom August 27 2020 I’m here for you ❤️💝😘

Phil im so sorry for your loss 😢 💔

Thanks so much for reaching out to me even though you are going through the worst time yourself my heart reaches out to you thanks so much once again here for you too ❤

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