Unsure what to title this post!

[RockHippy]

I am a female in my 40's and I live with my parents due to unforeseen circumstances! My Dad is an alcoholic and regularly wishes he was dead! My Mum used to be an alcoholic as well but she stopped. I know that she still drinks now and then due to my Dad influence. I also feel that her memory is going.

I have been suffering with anxiety for a long time and went through a couple of really rough months recently. I found out that my vitamin D was low and now am taking vitamin D on a daily basis. I was feeling better but over the last couple of weeks I been having chest pains, pains in my arms, other random pains, hair loss (though this has been going on for a while) and feeling the anxiety building up again. I also have a tendency to worry a lot!

I think I feel like this because of my home situation. That has of late been ramping up again i.e my Dad getting worse. I am unable to move out as I don’t have the funds. I’m working a part time job at the moment but it only goes up to Christmas! I don’t know what to do and I felt like writing this to get it off my chest. So am sorry if it is all over the place and does not make sense.

[o2G2o]

I find that finances are often linked to anxiety. It creates a feeling like claustrophobia - you're "trapped" because you can't afford to be untrapped. You probably don't have a plan yet, which also leads to this hopeless, dead-end feeling. You need an exit strategy...something to work toward. Even if you fail at it ultimately a) you won't be any worse off and b) you'll be distracted from the anxiety it causes. Find your purpose. Aim for the moon in terms of what you'd like to do ("fashion designer"!) but be content with just being in the field if that's where you land ("buyer at an independent clothing store"!). Those are horrible examples. You get it though.

[Cassie2178]

Sorry you are facing these things at 40. As a female who is suffering with low vitamin D you may also be struggling with a hormonal imbalance due to peri menopause. Sometimes our thyroids get messed up during these years causing hair loss, and other physical complications.

As far as your parents its difficult situation. You need them for shelter but at the same time they are making you miserable. Perhaps you can find a local counselor to help you find full time work as well as work through your frustrations. Financial difficulties can cause so much pain. I found help on NewLife.com and Focusonthefamily.com Maybe you can check these sites out for help on both your relationship issues and your financial situation. Best to you.