So I’ve been on and off with my panic and anxiety (caused by health and relationship) since last April 2017. Most of the time becomes a dreadful moment. Realizing that it is now within my system trigerring various symptoms, though not completely healed, I must not live my life burried.
Recently, I attended my cousin’s wedding - it’s far away from home and had to travel with family members in one car. Imagine the chit chatting noises and traveling with a kid who throws tantrums from time to time - very unbearable for someone with anxiety as I hate noises. Ocassional dizziness, palpitations, irate mood, and feeling anxious came in but then thanks to my walkman, it did help a lot - played the tune I downloaded from YouTube called “Spoken Affirmations for Panic Attacks”.
The travel was like 4 hours - includes traffic, stopovers and up/downhill manuevers... but yey, made it to the hotel.
Getting and talking to hotel receptionist (because I’m the one who booked 2 hotel rooms) wasn’t easy, but yey I made it too!
Getting around the new city for 3D2N was very tiring and presented me tons of anxiety symptoms... but ey tried my best to just “go with the flow”.
There were instances that I almost skipped lunch with family but I told myself “why not give it a try, go out with them and see how it goes... you should see new places and take photos”; skipped going to the grocery because of the cold weather but told myself “just go... you can do it”.
After all the experiences, I came to realize that when you just go with the flow and accept that you have the anxiety... the anxious feeling can definitely go away. We just need to divert our thinking into something and not immerse more on the panicky and anxious feeling.
I’m not feeling panicky and anxious at the moment... maybe another episode lurking around but it is what it is.
Ultimately, I wish to completely recover from this mental illness.
So my dear friends, push toward your limit! It’s the most beautiful thing ever! Easier said than done but it works!
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