I have been fighting so hard just like I preach to others only to end up laying here across my bed (still) at 2:28am playing in my hair and becoming afraid because my chest pains won’t go away. Trying to breathe...trying to stop my thoughts. Twirling in my hair. I haven’t had a panic attack or suicidal thoughts in a month now but idk.I’ve literally been drowning myself in other people’s worries thru this site, at work, volunteer, random people, and associates. I guess I can’t avoid my problems. I try to because it’s so overwhelming and I can’t figure them out. Too many. It’s funny how i can help others but can’t help myself.
I guess today is one of them days. I’ll just sit in my sorrows. I just want a peace of mind. But I don’t want to cry and feel cold as this morning weather. I wish I could get my sh!d together. And my mother said this was all in my head ! Sigh.