Rock bottom: I've always been a quiet person... - Anxiety Support

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Rock bottom

Marliii1 profile image
3 Replies

I've always been a quiet person but never really had anxiety or anything. I'm now 21 years old and have so much social anxiety I feel embarrassed of myself. How can these be issues in my life.

I started working 3 years ago and It started around that time. I was really quiet when I got my first job because I never had a clue what I was doing. It was difficult but soon after I was able to work normally socialise with others and I was even promoted to group leader

Shortly after I left and found a new job the colleagues I worked with were very ridea and made me feel terrible. Now I still work with them and it's much better we all got to know one another and yet at times they are still rude.

It has shattered whatever confidence I had that I cannot even talk to people at all anymore. I try and avoid all social activities and try to get out of meetings or come late so I can just stand at the back and avoid having tone talk. I find it all so difficult to deal with even though I am good at my job it is never acknowledged. I'm planning on leaving but what if the next place I work is the same. I have no confidence left in me

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Marliii1 profile image
Marliii1
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3 Replies
Finglas-Boy profile image
Finglas-Boy

My work has always been very stress centred. Indeed much of the time it was the stress of juggling all the balls at once & meeting strict targets/deadlines that I thrived on. However entually gave way to the anxiety of meeting all my demands which now is overtaken by the deepest, darkest depressions that I've eve known. So, like the theory that smoking cannabis leads to the harder drugs, much of me fears that "ordinary" stress/anxiety leads to depression of such a degree, it too leads to actions/consequences of a much more serious nature.

lottiehendry profile image
lottiehendry

Hi! There is absolutely no need to feel embarrassed. I am in a very similar situation and 21 too - literally on the train home now after leaving my job! The anxiety had an affect on my work too, so it didn't work out (all for the best though!)

I was very confident in my first job during my final year of college (bar work) but the next few 'real' jobs (receptionist then marketing administrator in a law firm) shattered my confidence causing anxiety. I was bullied in my first law firm too, my boss was just awful.

My advice would be to start looking for a new job. If you are not happy with the people, it will be hard to gain strength to power through, as you don't have anyone to turn to. As you are good at your job, you don't have to rush anything. Looking for something new will be a confidence boost in itself and you know you can do it. Don't assume that people at your new place will be the same - chances are they will want to include you and help you fit it! You have been a group leader so you obviously have confidence and strength inside - it's just being suppressed at the moment in your environment.

We're only 21 - now is the time to chop and change, find your path and do what makes you happy. Hope you make the right decision for yourself! Keep us updated :)

valachia-t profile image
valachia-t

First of all you need to work on that problem, leaving is not the answer. If you leave, you could be leaving every job there after. So I think you might should get help and talk to a therapist maybe about what's going on, avoidance is definitely not the answer. I hope my advice helps you.

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