Idk what to do anymore😓

[Clw1216]

ive had anxiety ever since I was a little girl, but with all the stresses of this last year, my anxiety has been at it's worst. I never used to be this anxious and paranoid. A few months ago, it was more panicky type anxiety and now it's more health anxiety along with some panic. I've been feeling so out of it and sick(you can see my other posts for more specific symtoms) and it only seems to be getting worse. I now have constant nausea along with all my other symptoms. I've had sooo many tests done on everything except the one thing I really fear that is causing all this which is an MRI to check for a brain tumor. I still haven't convinced any of my drs to refer me for one and you can't get one here without a referral. I'm just so tired of everyone acting like nothing could possibly be wrong and I'm just overreacting because I have anxiety. It's to the point that I spend every second of everyday worrying about how long it's going to be and what else is going to happen before they agree to check my head. I feel like I'm never gonna be at peace until they do because the symptoms I'm experiencing are all brain tumor symptoms in the place of my head that I'm getting pains. I'm pushing everyone away and literally can't get out of bed because I've brought myself into a depression over this. I can't work because of my symptoms and lack of energy at all and I just wish I could be normal again. Also I'm nervous because a few months ago when I was having a lot of panic attacks, my resting heart rate was only 60-70 and my blood pressure was normal and now even though I feel less anxious and worked up, my resting heart rate is 90-110 and my blood pressure is low and these are also symptoms of a brain tumor so it's all just adding to my stress. I don't know what to do😞 I'm sorry this was long I'm just in a bad place right now and want to go back to where I was before all this stress started a year ago😭