Undiagnosed and so unhappy!

[djkwuk]

Please see attached pic.. (didn't realise you can't copy and paste!!) x

[Tay171]

Have you tried anxiety medication ?

[djkwuk in reply to Tay171]

Yes. This is not anxiety, anxiety is just a part of it

[Tay171 in reply to djkwuk]

Well I hope you get a diagnosis soon. Iv been through each of these come and gone with anxiety

[Tay171 in reply to Tay171]

Like you said this started in 2014? Has it got worse and worse or stayed the same ?

[Beevee]

Hi Djkwuk

Looking at your earlier response, most, if not all of the symptoms you have described are anxiety based. In my opinion, you are keeping yourself anxious by continually searching for answers as to why you feel and think the way you do, believing there must be another reason. In doing this, you are keeping yourself in the anxiety loop and trying to figure it all out with an anxious mind And keep going round in circles.

If you want to feel better and remove the symptoms, my advice is to to the opposite to what you have been doing since day one. Instead of fighting the symptoms, trying to push them away, trying to search for that elusive answer (I can tell you now, there isn't one), do absolutely nothing about them. Just let them be there and learn to be comfortable about feeling uncomfortable. at present, you are trying to fix your anxiety with an anxious mind which is the same as pouring petrol onto a fire!!! If you stop trying to figure it all out and let it all happen, without adding more fear, the symptoms wil gradually disappear.

I have posted a few messages on this website about the way to recover and recommend that you read all of them and buy the books I mentioned and practice acceptance. You don't need anything else whatsoever, apart from a little patience as it takes time to recover.

There are far too many people on this site searching for answers, comparing symptoms, fearing new symptoms. They don't seem to realise that what they are doing is feeding their anxiety and keeping it alive instead of starving it to death by allowing themselves to feel crap and doing nothing about them.

YOU WON'T GET BETTER UNTIL YOU STOP TRYING TO GET BETTER!

Trying to fix yourself just makes it worse so do the opposite and do nothing. It works. The less you try to do something about it, the more you recover.

Regards

Beevee

[Fallluna in reply to Beevee]

What books have you suggested?because I am definitely in a loop and aware of it. I can get out of it if I keep myself busy but I can't always be busy.

[Beevee in reply to Fallluna]

Recovery will not happen if you are doing things to avoid feeling anxiety. Recovery lies in feeling all the symptoms willingly and carrying on with your day. Doing normal things while feeling anxious will eventually bring back feelings of normality. Keeping yourself busy sounds very much like you are trying to rid yourself of the symptoms or force them away which is the wrong way.

The books which helped me to recover were Essential Help For Your Nerves by Dr Claire Weekes and At Last a Life by Paul David. The latter had severe anxiety for 10 years before recovering.

Recovery from anxiety is about a change in attitude towards the symptoms that you fear and overcoming them by complete acceptance of them. If you know and understand that all the symptoms are completely harmless, it takes away alot of the fear which drives all anxiety based disorders. Once you learn not to fear the symptoms, they will disappear. You just need to develop an attitude so that you are ok about not feeling ok.

[Icanbeathis2016 in reply to Beevee]

Ok. So I have to ask as I've always read your post and I do try to take your advice. So when you say just let the feelings come over you, don't try to avoid it by doing things. Would an example be like for instance. Ive been laying around in bed so far all day. I haven't left out the house yet but I did get up to fix something to eat and then I'm right back in bed. So of course I'll have thoughts and even symptoms that may come. So would this be an example of just letting the feelings come over me and doing nothing about it? Or in my case of sitting around in the house what would be your advice? Just in this example

[Beevee in reply to Icanbeathis2016]

If you are choosing to sit around the house because you want to avoid going out and feeling anxious then this is not acceptance. Acceptance is about living your life in exactly the same way you did before anxiety came along. Despite feeling uncomfortable, do normal stuff and take the anxiety with you. If you "hide away" at home, you are not exposing yourself to the fears that have built up and you will remain fearful. Fear is the root cause. This is how people develop agoraphobia. They don't fear a place, they fear the feelings that may/will come when they do go out. If the fear is there, panic attacks/anxiety is inevitable and the only way to recover is to face your fears and live your life, regardless of how you feel. Over time, the the brain learns that there is no threat and switches off your fear/flight response which triggers anxiety and feelings of panic (energy surges). Develop an "I don't care" attitude towards the symptoms (and mean it) and carry on regardless. Sufferers shrink away from anxious thoughts and feelings but that is all that they are. Just thoughts and feelings magnified multiple times by your anxiety. It may feel crap but entirely harmless. The thoughts and feelings won't disappear overnight but once you start losing the fear, they will reduce in severity and not bother you so much. And, the less they bother you, the more you recover. The mind and body will heal itself and those thoughts and feelings will no longer bother you.

[Icanbeathis2016 in reply to Beevee]

Ok. I got you. well i was in the house all day partly due to the not wanting to get out because of my issue but also to because I've become homebound due to this so I didn't really have anything planned today so that's also why I was just lying around. now I will say I do leave out the house to do my usual routine of dropping and picking up.the kids from school and if I need to like go to the grocery store I will go. but other than that I have become house bound. so I asked would me lying around and still allowing the symptoms to come over me as I just hang in the house? but I get what you mean as well. Usually if there is a task or something I really need to get done which requires me leaving the house I do get out and do what I need to IF I have to. but if it's nothing I need to get done then I'm usually in the house because of how things have become with this anxiety . but I get what you mean . thank you for helping me understand better

[Beevee in reply to Icanbeathis2016]

No problem. There is no problem staying at home if there is no need for you to be anywhere else. In simple terms, don't let anxiety dictate what you do or don't do, as the case may be. Do the opposite to what your anxious mind and body might be telling you, even if you feel like crap. Recovery lies in being in the midst of those places and being able to cope with the feelings by practising acceptance ("ah well, it's only anxiety and completely harmless) and not running away from the thoughts or feelings and staying the course. Continually doing the normal stuff with as much acceptance as you can muster will retrain your brain so that it doesn't keep triggering your fear flight response which is totally out of proportion to the situation. As I've said in other posts, the fear flight response for those in an anxious state has been triggered so much, so often, it becomes very easy to fire off. A bit like a well "greased" trigger of a gun compared to the trigger of a non sufferer which has rusted through lack of use and harder to fire.