Hello

[K2incali]

Hi. I have been looking for help and support for so long. I have terrible anxiety and severe depression. I have a desperate desire to be needed. My relationships with my children are falling apart because they don't need me anymore. I have a very dear friend that is trying so hard to help me because he has been here before. Help seems so far away. I have felt like this for as long as I can remember and I can't imagine being able to feel different. I don't ever ask for help and even this post is making me feel..... Well, like I'm weak. I don't like to feel weak. That's the one thing in my life that makes me angry. I've been feeling this way for a few weeks, usually I can brush it off, thrust my chin in the air and let it slide off my shoulders. This time I can't. I feel very lost.

[Agora1]

Then I'm glad you came here K2incali. You are not weak. We all get to that point at one time or another. It's difficult living with something that is chronic. We almost adapt to that way of life. I get angry as well of having lost family and friends because of this disorder and get tired of feeling alone. This forum has so many caring and understanding people who can give you that virtual hug that makes us feel loved as well as important in life. Sending a hug xx

[K2incali in reply to Agora1]

I thank you so much. The tears made it hard for me to read. I appreciate you for helping me. I am in a drinking spiral now. I feel like vodka is the only thing to help me

[Lynl in reply to K2incali]

Oh please don't do that then you will just pile on the problem of drinking. The exersize or yoga, something beneficial. Preferably Jesus, but not being pushy. Praying you find a healthy replacement for what your going through

[Agora1 in reply to K2incali]

K2incali, I'm sorry you are hurting so much right now. I don't drink but I can understand that you may be using it as an escape right now. You know that is not the answer. You need comfort. What is making you feel so alone and desperate in these last few weeks. Did something new happen to add to your stress or is it all just piling up on you? It might be the time to talk with someone, a therapist, to ease your pain. They may be able to give ou some coping methods. I feel your pain. xx

[jennyjolly]

Your children may not admit they need you to you or themselves but if you were not there there would be a big hole in their lives.

Our children,unless we have been abusive, on subtle if not obvious levels always need us

To know at the back of their minds we are there for them.if/when needed.

Conversely being able to admit weakness is a strength.

Hope you see everything in it's true perspective and feel much better.

[waqasvic]

Hey , right now iam having sleep anxiety attacks . Whenever I close my eyes I get wake up with anxiety . It's the worst . I use to sleep so calmly .. you are not alone . I have depression too . Please hold on . Things do eventually get better .

[K2incali]

I appreciate your comments and I really believe that this is what I need. I'm glad I found a place where I can be comfortable to say what's on my mind. I'm sad that I'm in no place to help anybody else though. 😢