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Anxiety Support
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Anxiety is making life difficult.

Hello everyone, I'm a 68-year-old woman who's been dealing with anxiety of some sort most of my life. In the past several months now it's become much worse on a daily basis. I don't take medication for it because I've tried all of them in the past and I hate the way they make me feel otherwise, groggy and sluggish. The only thing I've found that helps me is to smoke marijuana, and that helps immediately, but I don't want to be dependent on it or anything else to make this better. I want to find a natural help that's also legal. I don't go to doctors any longer because, again, I've been there and done that So many times in the past and they have nothing to offer me. The main thing that's changed in my life is that in the last 2 months I've reconnected to a man I knew about a year ago and this time it seems like we might have a very good connection. It's wonderful, but since then I've been constantly anxious and scared. I believe it's because I know if this works out with him then my life will definitely change and that scares me. Anyone else experiencing anything like this? To top it off I just lost a couple of friends to cancer and that's scary. I seem to be much too aware of my mortality and have trouble not thinking about it.

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Hi Sally, I read your post and when got to the end it just struck a cord. I too have lost a friend through cancer recently. She was 48 years old and an amazing person. Like you it has made me think so much more about my mortality, and to this day I think about her, or say her name, every day and wonder how someone who was so well and had her who life ahead of her had to be taken. So, for me who has severe breathing issues and lots of anxiety it is a very scary world. Stay strong and we can both start to rethink our worries. We are going nowhere - yet! xx

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Hi...your friend wasn't "taken"...her body simply had a fatal disease set in (which happens all the time to us, from the very young child to the person in the "prime" of life to the very senior citizen) and died, dis--inter-grated, the way each and every one of us will. And in a relatively brief amount of time considering that the universe is billions of years old. Billions. Your life, my life, his/her life..over in just a "minute" and a life that is simply one of billions. "Billions", there's that word again. We all need to grasp what that word means...taste and chew and digest what "billions"really means.

Not to take away from the uniqueness of your friend and to discount your grief but we should all realize that no one person is more special than another--from me to the woman in Africa struggling each moment to feed her child, living in a poverty so heinous we can't even imagine, Although the woman in Africa imo deserves our "applause", not the person with multi college degrees who likely had shoulders to stand on to get where he is. A father who paid for his education and steak dinners, for example--and she has no one to even help her feed the child in her arms, the one whose belly is grotesquely distended (what?...God loves the person with the many degrees better...?...what a God, on the same level as most people, what a frightening thought).

Anxiety? You bet, and we sure have reasons to be anxious. I'd like to work on this with others...to learn how to accept life on planet earth with courage and not with a propanolol. Surely there is someone here made of the same cloth.

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Wow, what a convoluted response that offered no help or ideas about what might help...only pointing out all kinds of things that we all know and it felt condescending at the least. She focused on the death of my friend and that had little to do with the overall issues I'm having, which she didn't even mention. Thanks for responding, but it's not helpful.

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With real courage and acceptance to face our own mortality--some believe that man's denial of his own eventual "nothingness", as one poster said, is at the root of all anxiety--I have the feeling that the world would not be overflowing with such angst filled individuals.

"Courage" sez the cowardly lion.

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Sally, I too was bit confused by the response that annabettina gave. But from my perspective I understand your anxiety and feelings and just wish I had a magic pill to make it better. As for the new (or renewed) man in your life - take it slow and enjoy the ride. Try not to overthink what might happen - I know that feeling - I do it too about everything.

Take care of yourself. Kim

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Sorry you were confused. This is an anxiety group, yes, and I was just trying to offer an explanation for the real reason for anxiety, an explanation that many eminent psychiatrists and psychologists have held for years. That is, man's fear anxiety regarding his own mortality underlies GAD, etc.

This fear, since the beginning of time, has caused man, the human animal, to develop religions which put a god in control and often an afterlife which can transcend the grave. Being a rotting piece of meat in a coffin and food for the insects and nothing more--no angel, no eternal spirit that goes on--is too much for most all when they think of themselves, especially when they think of their children, parents, friends, etc. It strikes horror in most...hence, all the religions which man has come up with, with each man believing his religion is the "right" one btw, religions which most often include a story which overcomes death of the physical body and involves living forever in "heaven", nirvana.

Perhaps by being strong and courageous about this possible reality of the grave being the final end to us, we can come at lot closer to eliminating GAD, panic disorder, etc. instead of using a "bandaid" such as antianxiety pills, ADs, and support groups which largely, not all, just pat hands (ADs can help some...helping some by giving a "don't care"/numb feeling).

Instead of trying to find a dysfunctional reason for our anxiety (in the brain, etc.), let's acknowledge that yes, we humans have reason for our anxiety...we know we are going to die and what may be the final end to our brief lives....in a grave with our bones simply food for the future anthropologists just as the bones for billions of prehistoric human beings who have walked this earth are food for today's anthropologists. Morbid? It is the reality of life on planet earth.

instead of skirting around our possible reality, let's have the courage to face it together, discuss it, instead of looking for a way to correct the GAD, for example, which may be in the majority of cases a normal response to what really ails us. By confronting what really ails most people perhaps we can get a better grip on our anxiety regarding other things (other things may just be a cover for the real source of our anxiety). Obviously, the pills aren't working for many people....time to find a better way.

Courage, sez the cowardly lion.

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I was not confused, I was merely pointing out that your rant about all of this was not addressing my issues in my post. You don't have to explain all of this to me, I come from a long career in the medical field working primarily with psychology and psychiatry, so I know what you're talking about, but you don't really have to go on so long and in such detail here unless someone is specifically asking you for that much information. In my case it wasn't needed and to the point now that it's not even welcome and has no validity for me. Please stop.

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Sally, if you look at how the replies fell I wasn't addressing your posts at all but those of Kimmy22. My replies fell directly under her posts. I think you're confused...look at how the responses fell.

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I am kimmy22 and I do not wish for you to comment on or explain to me your version of what I am saying to another member. Big words and long winded meaningless sentences in no way replace genuine concern and empathy. Please Annabettina do not comment on anything in my reply to others or a post of my own.

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I am not Kimmy lol, I am Suzy not sure why I posted under another name or how I did! :)

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Mortality.... I do not like thinking about it either. It scares me to my core. I feel I should not be afraid because it will happen to all of us one day. I just hate the thought of not existing anymore. And what if it hurts?

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OMG I THINK ABOUT IT ALL THE TIME GET ME SO SCARED 😓 I TRY KEEP MY MIND POSTIVIE BUTS LIKE IN BACK OF MY HEAD IM ONLY 19 already scared to died

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This post might help if you are trying to find a natural way of dealing with the intrusive throughts

healthunlocked.com/couchtob...

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Hi Sally! I am 54 and have had anxiety most of my life....I am finally starting to see what it is....there is a book by Claire Weeks from many years ago, but it's not a large book and explains anxiety the best of any I have read. It's called hope and help for your nerves. She calls it nervous illness, but she is speaking of anxiety.....I think it is like 5.99 at Barnes and Noble....get it, read it, truly will help.....it did me :)

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