Hello, I'm new here. Female.24. I've been suffering from anxiety on and off for the last 5 years. I'm about to be 25. This past year my anxiety has been horrible. Every morning I wake up nauseous, tingly, dry mouth, dizzy. I feel tired all the time. I'm not motivated to do anything. I also suffer from depression. Writing this brings tears because its not fair how such illnesses can drag you down. . I want to start living so bad and every night I tell myself tomorrow will be different and its not. I wake up feeling tired, sick, all I want to do is stay in bed cuddle with my dogs, and just watch movies or read a book. That's the only thing that calms me down and makes me feel safe, I hate going out. My poor boyfriend that wants to go out to watch a movie or to eat has to deal with my fear of facing people and being out. I feel like I'm loosing it and I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm here to talk to someone that understands what I'm going through. I just feel stuck. I feel like my twenties are flying by. I still live at home with my mom. I do have a job that actually pays well and I'm also scared that I wont be able to hold this job. I've had this job for three years and the past year going in to work has been dreadful not because I do not like it but because of the way I feel. My mother, blessed her heart has found herself a significant other and is leaving me our house to live with him and I don't blame her but I'm just scared. Scared of being alone. Scared that I will have to face all of these responsibilities by myself. I get it I'm 25 I'm a big girl but when you suffer from anxiety and depression you can hardly hold yourself up alone. Today I woke up and I couldn't even stand because I felt so light headed and nauseous . I've just been in bed all day. Do any of you out there understand the way I feel? I just want it to get better. This past week I've been crying everyday because I almost feel dead inside. I feel like I'll never be my old self. I feel like I'll never enjoy life or the things I use to be interested in.
Currently I'm taking natural anti stress supplements that do help for my anxiety. I use to take lorazepam but my body became so dependent on it that it started to become scary. My sleep is on and off. Some weeks Ill sleep great others not so much. These last three days I've been sleeping during the day. I will fall asleep at night and out of nowhere I will wake up jumpy and scared. Also for some reason my body has been very itchy. Almost as if I'm having an allergic reaction.
Last time I went to the doctor she had prescribed me some medication for both anxiety and depression. I could not take it because it made me feel like my heart was going to explode. I haven't gone back because I just feel like she doesn't understand. I had stopped taking the lorazepam and I knew I was having withdrawals from it. It was the worst. I vowed to never take those pills. When I went back I had told her about the situation and instead she said its impossible to get a withdrawal from that medication and prescribed me more.
Do any of you do a holistic approach to your anxiety? How about counseling? I'm thinking maybe I should start talking to a counselor.
Does anxiety also come with depression? Do people tend to suffer from both? I get depressed because of how anxious I feel and how I cant function normally.
Also I was wondering if I end up not being able to hold this job. What are my options for income? Like disability? Any other help? I've made a promise to myself that I will work until I can't. I'm not sure if I'm reaching that point. I'm trying my hardest to hold this job but its getting harder every day.
I hope to make new friends here that I could talk to. Any of you ever need to talk I'm here. Lets fight this together!
Sooo discouraged right now :(
Worrying about everyone right now..
