Feel Like I'm Dying...

[dxburke]

I'm new to this whole thing, but I feel so alone and embarrassed with myself. I have had a heart condition since I was about 18 and a few months ago, I had another episode. Three in fact that hit me within a week. Since then, I have had so much anxiety that I feel like I am just SURE that I'm dying. When I stand up and walking, I feel my legs going numb and I start to panic. I can barely leave my house. The only thing I can manage up to do is go for a ride with my family sometimes.

I'm 24 years old and I feel like I'm just living every day to die. I am SCARED every single day. My cardiologist tells me that it isn't anything to do with my heart other than my SVT which isn't life threatening. I'm going to a neurologist as well to see if everything is fine, but the problem I'm having is that I am ALWAYS scared I'm dying. For the last two months, it's ALL I think about.

I can't eat. I've lost sixteen pounds in the last month. I can't sleep and the only time I do sleep is when I've finally exhausted myself to the point of passing out. I don't do the things that I used to do that made me happy. I used to love going to do sporty things. I loved going out with friends and just going for walks. Just not anymore. I don't even feel like I'm in my body anymore. I feel so disassociated from EVERYTHING. Nothing feels real anymore. I realize how odd that sounds and trust me, I feel bad enough, but even seeing photos of myself/my own reflection gives me a panic attack. Standing and walking instantly makes me feel like I'm going to pass out and I freak out.

I can't go to the store. I can't go anywhere. The only thing I managed to be able to do was go to school and even at that it wasn't very well. I'm not kidding when I say every minute of my day I think about dying. I panic every second of the day and even when I try to think of other things and do other things, I just end up back on that thought.

Does anyone have any tips or thoughts on how to maybe get better? I have a family that thinks things are just as easy as flicking a switch and they aren't very supportive of me when it comes to what I'm going through. The way I feel just isn't normal and it is awful. I'm wasting my life with fear and need some kind of suggestions on how to help myself if anyone minds giving some. I'm pretty desperate because I'm terrified every second of the day and can't seem to get around it. Thanks for anyone that can offer up any kind of advice.

[Hidden]

Hi. Sorry to read of your distress and suffering. As I quite often say on the - the only people who really understand what you are going through are people who have the same or similar issues to deal with. Families will usually try to be sympathetic and supporive, but that quickly wears off if the health issue is anxiety based. People often need to 'see' an illness in order to feel empathy - you dont 'see' anxiety in that sense., so the concept is difficult for them to understand. But you will find unlimited sympathy support and understanding here I am happy to say.

WE are alike in some ways- we both have anxiety issues, but they are based on events and situations which are easily identified. In out cases - our hearts, and I completely understand the terror and fear that you are going through when the spectre of death grips.

In my case, I have used distraction techniques for dealing with it, and a short course of medication right at the beginning. I also come here every day and read peoples posts. If I can add something useful then I do - and this also helps me as I am thinking through not only the other persons issues but my own as well.

I am not sure if therapy is a possibility for you, but it would be very useful if it was, so that your treatment is more holistic - the physical aspects and the emotional aspects. I really do wish you well.

[Strech]

Yes mate ur not alone I'm on sertraline at night and propananol and through the day I'm on propananol and pantoprazole and I'm constantly waking up feeling terrible and not sleeping and always breathless and panicky

[Hidden]

I am really, really sorry u are feeling this way. Congrats for sharing it with us. It is severe, scary anxiety you are dealing with in my opinion. Is there any way you can see a therapist? It sounds like very ingrained feelings which will be hard to release.

[Strech]

Plz can someone please tell me if they get horrible side effects after sertraline and propananol together at night I've been doing and it freaks me out plz make me less anxious Ty