Feeling bewildered : Hi. I'm not really sure... - Anxiety Support

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Feeling bewildered

marbs profile image
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Hi. I'm not really sure how this works but I feel like I need to say this. For as long as I can remember, even as a young child, I've had a sort of low grade anxiety murmuring away in the back of my mind, slowly but surely causing my confidence and happiness to ebb away. I'm now 21 and in the final stages of completing my Honours degree. Late last year, my motivation dried up because my workload and lack of self-belief sent my anxiety and low mood spiraling out of control. Outwardly, I'm pretty good at playing roles and appearing like I haven't a care in the world, most of the time. This is useful but is a problem in itself because whenever I feel particularly low, or when I tell people that I struggle with my mental well-being, they brush it off as something that 'will pass', when I know it won't. I saw a counsellor for a block of sessions recently and she repeatedly told me to see my doctor about medicine to help me cope but I didn't go because, as per, I thought I could push through my difficulties alone. I tried to use mindfulness but it really hasn't helped me. The situation is only getting worse. I avoid social situations where possible and find it particularly difficult to speak to people my own age- I'm even becoming anxious in one-on-one company with close friends. I am very self-conscious. At night, I lie awake for hours fretting and crying about unlikely, dire situations. I habitually (and severely) bite my nails, which I think is really disgusting, but I can't stop because my anxiety makes me pick at them constantly. My mood is really low these days and almost all of my thoughts are negative. I feel guilty about the way I am because my family are wonderful and I've never been in any way majorly traumatised. I'm tired of feeling like this. Would it be beneficial for me to see my GP? Would he be able to refer me to another counsellor or would he just prescribe medicine?

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marbs
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Janayyyy profile image
Janayyyy

Hi I feel your pain but believe me you are not the only one myself included I feel like I wrote your post I suffer daily and when we try to express myself I get nothing I have panic attacks and anxiety and I just don't know what to do my mind is always on my health its really scary do you ever get the heart skips too???

marbs profile image
marbs in reply to Janayyyy

I do, yeah. Especially when someone approaches me to speak to me unexpectedly, like in the library or somewhere like that. I get really choked up and can barely form words, my face will pink up, my eye contact is terrible, and my heart starts racing. All of that exacerbates the problem because then, instead of focusing on something to say in response, I find myself panicking and thinking only about the fact that I look strange and seriously awkward.

Good afternoon, a good starting point may be to build up your confidence and self esteem. This will give you a firm foundation with which to work on, as it appears it has taken a battering at some time in your life.

Confidence is an inner feeling , so hypnotherapy is a good option,as this connects to your inner emotional centre that sparked those thoughts off in the first place. No amount of conscious reasoning will change these.

When you imagine a situation is going to be really bad, you are in reality, self hypnotising. You are worrying about what might happen, so you are setting up your mind for failure.

This perception you have of yourself, must have initially stemmed from somewhere. It sounds as though it needs addressing and then be open to recognise your abilities. Without speaking directly to you, it is difficult to come to a specific conclusion, but I would recommend therapy , as a clinical hypnotherapist will guide your mind to a more positive mindset. If you can start to see yourself as successful and achieving, you are then stopping that negativity.

Focus an what you have achieved and never on what you haven`t .... if you start positive thinking, this will help "reboot" your way of thinking.

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