I have recently had a loop recorder inserted in my chest due to a tachycardic heart condition, and within the next 4 weeks will be going in for EP studies on my heart. The loop recorder, though slightly invasive, never really had me too worries or anxious because the risks were small. However, the EP studies have a lot more severe risks, like stroke, cardiac arrest, perforation of the heart, bleeding...logically, I know that these risks are unlikely to occur and are just the worse case scenario, but my panic disorder feeds off these worse case scenarios and works me up into a state. I constantly have trouble breathing and feel short of breath, I have aches and pains due to over working my chest muscles from trying to catch my breath, I feel dizzy and lightheaded all the time. It feels like I'm always on the verge of death. I can no longer tell what is being caused by my heart condition and what is being caused by the panic and anxiety disorder. I just don't understand where all this came from! One morning I woke up, it was an ordinary day and I felt fine! Then all of a sudden half way through the day, I couldn't breathe, I was getting palpitations, and my heart was beating so fast and heavy it felt like it was about to bounce right out of my chest! I collapsed and I haven't been the same since. do all panic and anxiety disorders start like this? Your fine one second until you're just not? I'm terrified all the time, my brain constantly coming up with new conditions that I could have that could kill me. I never want to be alone because my brain always tells me "if you have a heart attack right now, there is no one here to help you" I just wish it would go away!!! I have never felt so helpless! I wish I knew a better way to cope!
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