It's so not getting better

I've been feeling super anxious for the last past month. When i say super anxious I mean that it affects my life so much that I can't think of ANYTHING else. I'm so obsessed with my look that I don't want to go out at all. I sometimes force myself to get out of my flat and do something useful. This is going to be my last year in Uni and I'm not too sure I'll be able to study. I never thought I was as ugly as I am atm. I'm not going to see a GP until 20th. I'm looking at my old pics and the thought of never being able to look like this kills me. I used to look so good so natural before I had this permanent eyebrow make up treatment. I want my old self back. I hate myself. I know i sound ridiculous right now but i suffer as if a lost my arm or something. I can only sleep with Zopiclone which makes me feel high for some reason and it kinda puts me back to normal. However, in the mornings I feel even worse. I think I'm going nuts.


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6 Replies

  • when u look back how u used to be it hurts i know the feeling :(.. i feel like liveing in the past most of the time i was normal back then and i miss it so much it hurts and i hope u feel better when u seen your GP and hope things will get back to normal u are not alone in this me and all the other are here for u :) xx

  • Thanks a lot. It helps to know that you understand how i feel. so looking forward to seeing my gp :) xxx

  • Hi:-)

    Don't beat yourself, I feel a lot like this lately too, I look in the mirror I feel so disgusting, lost weight, look frail, tired, drawn out, all this worry and anxiety is very tiring, I think to myself when was the last time I actually smiled and felt at ease.

    I know it gets easier and sometimes there are bumps in the road, but you can get through it. As hard as it can be, taking your mind of constantly being obsessed by it helps, am in that trap right now and I cant be bothered, constantly feel ill and rubbish, then am obsessed and that's all I talk about and think about.

    Visualise helps ease your mind, thought changing helps so much to figure out where your going wrong in your thinking, and changing behaviours that you've adopted since feeling and thinking this way.

    I hope you start to feel bit better soon :-) Keep smiling

  • Hiya! Thank you so much for the support :) i know it's such a girly thing to be obsessed with our looks, glad i'm not alone. What is visualize tho? I'd do anything to feel better! Xxx

  • Hi You are not alone, some times you have to make a little list of all the things you like about yourself and how you

    look just a small list to start with and think about each one and very slowly start to like each little bit, I think you will be ok. happy to listen.

  • Thank you very much! I feel like it's bigger than me. A month of living in this hell is being exhausting. Mentally and physically. I'll try to make a list but i'm not sure if it helps. But thank you so much gor your comment take care xxx

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