my introduction

[noneveralone]

Hi ,

At the outset, I would like to apologise if any of these posts are triggering to anyone as I am being open and honest with my health so that I can learn , engage and support. This is my first post and sorry if it is a bit long.

I hope everyone is doing ok. I would like to connect with you all to learn and engage in discussions. I have a few health issues which has resulted in me being long term off sick in my clinical role. I have always had an underlying depression /Anxiety since my childhood days but I had a few cris points at age 14/22/35(worst)/36 all which lead to a failed suicide attempt. I came out stronger (as I thought) with more coping strategies at work / education etc. i have been more of a giverI just realised the power of self compassionate care after my worst crisis at age 35.

I have however gone to a stage now where I am struggling with health issues and seeing no way out of it. I try to but then fall in the troughs of despair and hopelessness. Any planning for the future either draws a blank. Even thinking casues me a kind of extreme cognitive fatigue. My wife also feels if I may have an element of ADHD since my childhood which is now getting out of control. I have arranged a visit to my GP to discuss and probably get a referral for a consultation with the psychiatrist. I am struggling to engage in any return to work thinking as I get easily distracted/overwhelmed/inattentive and either give up or move on to something else resulting finally in giving up all. I have a long standing history of procrastinating and giving up even after putting in lot of effort (example- cancelling meetings /job interviews etc at the last minute. I get extremely anxious with deadlines/unfamiliar tasks . At present I would appreciate if anyone had any experience of this and any suggestions/tips. I am very keen on engaging in work, however small with reasonable adjustments for my health issues.

P.s- please try to read the ‘about me ‘ section in my profile which will give you an additional context.

Many thanks in advance and all keep well and safe.

[Hidden]

Hello noneveralone,

I will say welcome to this forum, although I am fairly new to it myself. I think you will find support on the forum and hopefully lots of suggestions from others with similar struggles/challenges.

I have been out of work due to my mental health deteriorating 2 years ago. I am exploring volunteer opportunities for when I am ready to do this.

I have finally found the right (for my situation) professional support since September, to help with my root causes of my anxiety/social anxiety. An excellent GP and private therapy that most of my PIP pays for.

[noneveralone in reply to Hidden]

Hi Hidden , Many thanks for taking the time to read and respond although you are new to it.

I am so happy you found the right support. It is always nice when you have a good engaging health care professional . I am currently browsing through similar posts and even being able to share my thoughts in a forum is beginning to give me some headspace . I also understand it could increase my fatigue if I take too much in.

In addition, just a mater of thought- I also found an app called silveeclod quite useful but not sure if you could just sign in as when I did previously you needed to have a Mental health professional to monitor. You can perhaps discuss this with your private therapist.

I wish you the very best with your recovery.

Take care

[Hidden in reply to noneveralone]

You are welcome. There are so many helpful posts on here, it is worth exploring and I am the same, I dip in to it when I feel I can.

Thank you for the app, I will have a look. Therapy is very full on right now, but always good to ideas for the future.

I realise for me, I have to experiment with different things and then focus on what feels relevant or useful for me. But I love being curious fortunately, so that part comes easy.

I definitely feels less isolated with my struggles since finding this forum and the PTSD one (which includes Comples PTSD.)

So many lovely people on these 2 forums, who are also struggling and yet so strong.

[noneveralone in reply to Hidden]

thanks again Hidden . Your reply is very reassuring and I am also spending time reading some of the posts on and off in between my fatigue episodes. I’m currently exhausted and in my bed with trying to keep mobile within my home environment but finding even that makes me so exhausted requiring a long recovery period.

I’m learning to be kind to myself and take small steps every minute than rushing . As you, im definitely getting the positivity from many members who have seen many struggles,yet going strong 👍 thank you and we will keep in touch on how we move on from here and support each other through every way

[Hidden]

Thank you for your lovely reply. And I am so glad my response is helpful for you.

[noneveralone]

Hi Hidden yes it is extremely useful and special as you are my first message buddy since signing up this morning . I like your positivity which is always helpful when we all are going through tough times 🙂

[gettingsomewhere]

Hi noneveralone

A belated welcome from me as well! I hope you find being here as supportive as I have.

I'm sorry to read of your health issues impacting your life so much. Sounds like you have a lot on your plate.

Do you find there's overlap between physical and mental health conditions? If so, and this is a long shot which may or may not interest you....SIRPA UK may be of benefit.

Georgie Oldfield an NHS trained physio continues the work of Dr John Sano into the Mindbody approach.

Like Phoenix above I'm curious, I like to call it thinking sideways. My history is unique as yours will be, and mine certainly didn't fit into a box!

The biggest eye opener for me was reading that physical pain uses the same neural pathways as emotional pain. For me it enabled another way to look at my chronic pain and back injury (years ago) and how anxiety played its role.

Good luck!

sirpa.org

[noneveralone in reply to gettingsomewhere]

Good Morning gettingsomewhere . I just woke up to your supportive message. Thank you so much . I am sure that in my case there is a two way connection between my physical pain and mental health. My mental health struggles lately has been more of a reactive response to my physical issues. I’m pleased you are feeling supported here. Thanks for signposting me to mind body connection and the SIRPA website. I will certainly have a look. Being a chronic pain sufferer for the past 13 years , I totally understand the linkage between physical and emotional pain . At present I consider my bedridden situation ( past 2-3 ) weeks as an extreme flare up and started to notice the decline in emotional health, so I totally agree with your experiences. I must say signing up on healthunlocked has been quite a positive step. I am really inspired from some of the stories of people who move forward with hope although presenting in significant struggles more than my issues. Again, thank you so much and wishing you the very best in your recovery . Keep up the good work in positively impacting on many lives on this forum.

Have a great weekend

[gettingsomewhere in reply to noneveralone]

Hi again noneveralone

Thanks for your kind reply. I wasn't sure how you'd receive a suggestion about the mindbody approach - it's not everyone's cuppa tea!

Being bedridden for a few weeks sounds very tough for you

Seeing the connections in my experience is the first step. Georgie has tips on journalling which is the 2nd step, or was at least for me. Unravelling your past and making connections such as recognising recurring patterns. It requires some introspection!

I sign up for her enewsletters where she often interviews or links articles from others involved in this field - many medical specialists in the US.

It's a growing number and fortunately there's increasing awareness of ACEs (adverse childhood experiences) which brings many of us to this site.

I hope you find some ideas! I'm happy to chat further if you wish. All the best.

[noneveralone in reply to gettingsomewhere]

Hi gettingsomewhere ,

Thanks so much for your reply. Yes, I agree with you .Although very beneficial , some therapies in mental health could be very taxing and requires a strong commitment to engage. This is just me but I like taking things at my own pace when I get in the far end in a crisis it takes me a very y long time to even put that first step. That’s the precise reason I like this forum. I can read share and engage all at my own pace. I also come from the generation where face to face support was the thing .I’ve always been that guy who could get easily distracted and lose focus( that’s y I think I may have ADhD) and lack motivation in engaging with anything unfamiliar. I have listened to a few excellent health oriented podcasts and have ACES mentioned in a few of them. I would say it has definitely improved my awareness . I have been equally very cautious as I have always found myself crying badly at times due to my bitter past experiences. I truly appreciate your support and we can always keep in touch to support each other. Sort for the long reply and pouring my heart out. I have some relief atleast letting some steam out.

Have a nice day and keep safe.

Take care and let’s keep in touch