No more friends

[LadyLovelyLocks]

I have recently begun a journey of healing, after going into rehab and getting clean in 2023, I developed long covid. I had lost most of my friends because they were addicts and I only had 2 close friends (I'm highly introverted) after finding out one of them had been trash talking me (while drunk), saying I was a loser and wasn't making anything of myself because at 40, I had to move back in with my parents and I haven't worked in 5 years because of my addiction and depression, and now because of long covid. I confronted her and she ghosted me, after 14 years of friendship. I considered her family and she was the last person I would have thought would be so cruel. I've been doing a lot of work to heal my trauma and I have realized recently my last good friend was not that great of a friend after all. Tonight we had our final fight and I broke it off completely. It makes me sad that after 14 years, she is gone too and now I have zero friends I can reach out to. I know it's good in the long run, it will force me to make new connections with healthier people (they were both high functioning alcoholics) but being such an introvert makes that hard.

I'm also just feeling so infuriated at how she has projected everything she's doing onto me and refuses to take responsibility for her actions. She never remembers important things I've told her about my life and I can't talk to her about anything without her getting upset and defensive. Even asking her to support me in a particular way (sending an article about helpful things to say to a person experiencing trauma after she had said some very, very unhelpful things) she got super mad at me. She even said "being concerned about how everything I say or do will effect you is a lot. I'm not gonna take a class on how to he your friend." I'm just so incredibly hurt and lonely now, with no one to talk to about all this.

[jbjacksoncfc]

first really quickly just to get it out of the way, you have the BEST username, i LOVED Lady Lovely Locks when i was a young girl!!!

i'm so sorry to hear that you are struggling this way! please believe that you are NOT alone; i for one, am here and willing and happy to listen *&* respond to anything you would like to talk about with someone, & offer support, encouragement, help if/whenever i can. i wish i had some helpful advice or something for you, but i really dont. i just wanted to let you know that you're not alone & you have someone here who is listening & cares. i wish you the very best and hope that you're able to find relief and solution(s) that work well for you

[LadyLovelyLocks in reply to jbjacksoncfc]

Thank you! I'm always excited to find another lady lovely Locks enthusiast haha most people have no idea what I'm talking about. And thank you for your encouragement and support. Just knowing there are people out there who understand and are willing to listen helps tremendously!

[casablancalover14]

Sometimes we lose someone close to us, and we really dont know why. If we stop and analyze the situation, we understand that maybe they werent really our friend after all. I have had that happen to me too. I am adjusting to accepting that I can make new friends if I put forth the effort. Every day is a new challenge, but something I need to do. Keep your spirits up!🙂🙂

[LadyLovelyLocks in reply to casablancalover14]

Thank you! Yea I have known for awhile that I need to make new, more supportive "real" friends and I think I've sort of held onto this relationship longer than I should have as a safety net. Even though it really hurts to find put how little she really cares, it may he the push I need to really get outside my comfort zone (as a major introvert) and find healthier people.

[casablancalover14 in reply to LadyLovelyLocks]

I know its easier said than done. I am also an introvert, so it takes me a little time to make new friends. I am very reserved, and cautious at times. Just know that there are brighter days ahead, we just have to jump in and go for it. ☺️