How to deal with sexual abuse?

[sadandloner1]

Talking about this is so hard. But I was sexually abused when I was between the ages of 4 and 5, it was a family member. I've never talked about it before until I was 15, I accidentally blurted it out in front of my family, I was mad and drunk. Nobody believed me, I shut down immediately. Never mentioned it ever again. One day, i went to this party with my sister, saw this guy that i thought was my friend, he raped me and i've blamed myself ever since. When I turned 16, my older cousin started molesting me every night for a year, I couldn't tell anybody cause I knew they would never believe me. I hated men, grew disgusted by them.

[TheGalician]

I am sorry to hear what has happened to you. There is darkness in the world. What would make you feel less sad….more hopeful….less alone?

[sadandloner1 in reply to TheGalician]

I'm not sure... I have siblings, they are a blessing honestly. Sometimes they make me feel less sad, but it's not enough. I drink a lot, smoke weed, anything that I can put my hands on. I am do desperate for an escape that I'm literally killing myself with substances.

[casablancalover14 in reply to TheGalician]

I am so sorry that all of this happened to you. And it makes it worse when your own family doesn't believe you. I know I've said this before, but I hope you can find a good doctor to help you get through this, so you can live a peaceful life.😐

[sadandloner1 in reply to casablancalover14]

Hopefulness. Thank you.

[blackcat64013]

I am sorry that some of the males in your life have behaved so badly towards you.Without your consent, what they did makes them rapists, pure and simple.

I feel that you might need to take in some therapy to improve your mental health and well-being.

When you are strong enough, you may choose to report these attacks on yourself to the police. The choice will always be yours alone.

In the meantime, research local support groups and perhaps a national helpline. The caveat is I am saying this based on what's available in Australia.

Look after yourself first and then consider the next best step. 🐈‍⬛

[sadandloner1 in reply to blackcat64013]

I've never given therapy a thought. Thank you so much though.

[worthytobeloved]

Poor you - you've been through so much horrible stuff in your childhood. Is there any way you can talk to a doctor, psychiatrist, therapist, counsellor, church leader - anyone? You really need to be listened to, and then helped come to terms with it as something that's in the past, and move on to making a good life for yourself. Best of luck. xxx

[sadandloner1 in reply to worthytobeloved]

I have absolutely nobody to talk to. And thank you.

[catsrock]

I'm so very sorry for all of these horrible things that happened to you. Sending you lots of support.

[sadandloner1 in reply to catsrock]

Thank you.

[ashleybakerr01]

I was groomed by my uncle ages 14-17... Never been able to talk bout it. I told my parents, they said I was just wanting attention so I've never spoke on it again. I've been raped by a older man when pregnant for my lastz which I lost. Not due to it but still hurts just as bad 😔. I'm here to talk if you'd like. You're not alone

[sadandloner1 in reply to ashleybakerr01]

What a cruel society we live in. It's horrible what you've been through. How comforting it is to talk to someone who relates.

[ashleybakerr01 in reply to sadandloner1]

It's really comforting in a way. But I hate that some people understand bc that means they've been through it too, and I hate that for anyone

[sadandloner1 in reply to ashleybakerr01]

True. I wouldn't wish sexual violence on anybody

[Sugaree]

I was also sexually abused as a child. I had nightmares about it but couldn’t name my abuser. Even in therapy my mind kept that memory repressed. Then one night it all came together,it was my father. In college I was date raped twice. I had used alot of drugs and alcohol since I was 14 so I was an easy target in college. I never told anyone except my husband. My father is 91 now and I forgave him in my heart. I am not very comfortable with him. I eloped because I was so ashamed and afraid to have a traditional wedding with my father walking me down the aisle. I am so sorry you have to live with that. I can’t believe I am writing about it. I learned in therapy that we were once victims now we are survivors. A big hug for you and the others here that were abused. I hope writing about it helps. 🌸

[sadandloner1 in reply to Sugaree]

Thank you for sharing your story with me. What you went through was terrible, and your voice deserves to be heard and I believe you 100%. Talking about these things need a lot of courage. Flashbacks are the worst.

[DontJudge]

It is really sad to hear these demeaning story. I feel for you and hope you get better as you advance🙏

[sadandloner1 in reply to DontJudge]

Thank you