I am so lonely

[Komodo1105]

I moved across the country for a great reason. A really good job. Since I have been here I have become more and more depressed and more and more lonely. My own personal challenges keep me from seeking out others so I spend a lot of time alone. I'm married. My children are grown. My husband doesn't understand depression. He thinks I have so much going for me. I only see regret in my life and it's really hard connect with others because all I can think of is how sad I am. Is anyone else like us?

[Crookedsmile]

I can relate to feeling crushed by loneliness. I’ve read that joining charities, volunteering, going to classes, joining clubs can be very beneficial and help you branch out! I have pretty bad social anxiety lol so its hard to take my own advice but maybe those could help you? Its hard when you dont see what everyone else sees, like your husband sees what a bright light you are but yoy cant. I feel like were our own worst enemies sometimes.

[litethatnevergoesout]

don’t know what you mean by is anyone else like us?

[Komodo1105 in reply to litethatnevergoesout]

*typo. Like this

[litethatnevergoesout in reply to Komodo1105]

huh?

[litethatnevergoesout in reply to Komodo1105]

You asked “is anyone else like us?” Can you clarify that? who do you mean us?

[Perriex in reply to litethatnevergoesout]

Komodo explained it in their reply to you above.

They meant to say, "Is anyone else like this?"

It was a typo -- a mistake.

[corgi_fan817]

Hi Komodo, I once moved across the country to attend graduate school. Part of me says it was an adventure, but part of me says it was loneliest time of my life. The second year I had my own apartment (had apartment mates the first year), sometimes I would lay on the couch to go to sleep as if I was still at home during the summer. I would feel so sad.

Looking back, I do not regret moving as it was 30 years ago. I learned to be independent. I accomplished something on my own. It made a man out of me so to speak. I made some friends and we are still connected on Facebook. So I get what you are going through. Crookedsmile has some good ideas...I did do some social things.

In the evening, I used to exercise a lot. The apartment complex had some workout equipment. I would do some weightlifting and then walk for 30 minutes. I would always walk by this church on my walk. It seemed like the people there were happy. I now regret not stopping by and seeing this community up close even though my family never really attended church much growing up. I wish I would have gone there.

So I think the opportunities to find some outlets is there for you. Sometimes it takes courage to go forward. Believe me when I say, there are others out there who are feeling the same as you.