Hello again

[Willow2022]

It’s been awhile everyone. I took a long break from here for several reasons and now feel ready to pop back in again.

It’s odd though. In the last year, we moved to the other side of the country, bought a house, husband retired from the military and got a great job and kids are flourishing. But me? I had to go back on Prozac and anxiety meds. Everything is “great” and I feel suffocated by thoughts.

It’s so frustrating. I still have never accepted that I have depression and don’t know how to. I should realize I may be on antidepressants for life or the lows are too low for me to handle but I just can’t. I have no idea why. I have no negative feelings towards medications and being on them for life for OTHERS but for me, I feel broken.

I am having trouble finding a new therapist so that certainly isn’t helping. New insurance isn’t fun.

Thank for letting me vent. Hubby is supportive but he just doesn’t get it. I am sending a warm blanket of support to surround you all today. ❤️

[Agora1]

Hi Willow2022, good changes in our lives can be just as hard to accept as the

bad ones. Give yourself time to adjust to all that has happened more recently.

With change, comes hope. The seed has been planted for a better life for you.

May you blossom into the person you were meant to be. Thank your husband for

his service. Time for both of you to enjoy the present moments. xx

[Willow2022 in reply to Agora1]

Thanks Agora. Negative self talk is hard to combat when there is nothing in life to be “sad” about. It’s frustrating and exhausting.

[Agora1 in reply to Willow2022]

I hear you Willow.. I remember feeling as you do at one time in my life.

Life was good. I had it all but yet something was missing deep inside of me.

Don't overplay that card of sadness. Look inside of you since everything around

you seems to be in place. Don't allow these feelings to destroy what you've built.

If you have to be on antidepressants for a lifetime, so be it. You've got it all.

Embrace what's around you. xx

[Astro_potato]

I think one of the hardest things (for me, anyway) is giving yourself the same grace you would give others. I'm sorry you are going through this, and yes, it is maddening that sometimes there is no rhyme, reason, or logic to why we feel the way we do. It always seems like mental health would be easier for others to understand if it was a gaping wound. But, you are always stronger than you realize. Hugs to you 🙂