I'm agoraphobic on the severe side, but have only experienced for the last two years. Part of my anxiety disorder is genetically induced (maternal grandmother) and the other part stems from several difficult events that all happened around the same time: the loss of many precious keepsakes in a major move, the deaths of two precious animal companions, within months of each other, and the sudden death of a friend.
Does anyone else suffer from this debilitating disorder? If so, have you found a way to at least keep your head above water? I'm alone all the time and things feel a little surreal lately.
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PhoebeAgora
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I don't suffer with actual diagnosed agoraphobia, leaving the house comes and goes for me . 1 day I can face the big bad world and the next my home is the only place I feel safe .
Thanks for responding Ellamaye. It's good to know someone else gets that feeling . . that life on the other side of the door seems threatening sometimes and is too much to bear.
Hello and Welcome. Yes I have agoraphobia. I have found the only way out for me has been baby steps. Not overwhelming myself. I have got to the point where I do go out once a week with my boyfriend and once a month I drive myself to the pharmacy to pick up my meds. Other than that I am inside. It helps me so much talking here with someone else who is agoraphobic. That there is someone who actually understands. I am glad you have joined us.
That's the thing, isn't it . . "someone who actually understands." No one in my family understands and they've pretty much given up on me. They don't visit or call anymore. It's good you have a boyfriend, someone you're close to, but still the agoraphobia must be hard to bear sometimes. You're right about baby steps; not good to "think big," then beat yourself up when you can't accomplish. Thanks for your reply. I appreciate your reaching out.🤗
Thanks for your reply. Where I'm at is right here in my apt., alone for two years, I haven't left in all that time. I've never had any visitors either. I have my groceries delivered, all needs are met really, but I haven't been able to keep medical or dental appts. all this time and that's becoming a real problem. I don't know how I'll handle. It's really been a baffling experience for me, because I've always been very social. I definitely had some triggering events and then too inherited from my grandmother. Did you have a triggering event? Curious.
I have PTSD and have suffered from depression and anxiety for over 30 years. Covid lockdown is what triggered my agoraphobia. Do you have a therapist? I worked on getting out with my therapist. I went out in the yard when I was on the phone with him then went to get mail with him on the phone. Just taking baby steps before I went out alone. I talked to my therapist today and we talked about going out to get the mail. I did do it alone daily for two weeks a while back. It did become a little easier over time, but not enough that I wanted to keep doing it. Are you able to go outside at all or are you just inside the house? It must be so very, very hard being alone. Do you feel any better at all from being here with us?
Guess what? I talked with my therapist this afternoon and told her about how you worked with your therapist to get outside. We're going to give it a try next week; not sure I can do it though. Great idea. I get that you couldn't consistently go outside for your mail. I do that a lot - make a little headway, two steps forward, then two steps back, and so it goes. To answer your question, no I can't go outside and I have a ghostly appearance to show for it. Thoughtful question too when you asked if I felt better having found the group. I can say, yes! Yes, already, because it helps with the loneliness. Thanks for reaching out.💕 Take care, gajh.
I have struggled most of my life with depression/anxiety . I suffered major depression anxiety in 2023 and have t been able to drive or out. My husband and delivery is what I depend on . I was addicted to prescription Xanax and they took me off all wrong. I’m struggling more - can’t go out at all, it seems - I could a few times in early 2023. I was social too. Thinking of you.
Thanks, for your response, Doglove. Life can be so hard, and trying to get off Xanax makes it a nightmare. Sorry, you had to go through that. Like you, I've battled depression and anxiety most of my life, the result of a really screwed up childhood with parents who were alcoholics, themselves victims of depression and anxiety. From generation to generation, on and on it goes. It is hard to accept that my life has changed so dramatically from being actively involved in my community to a lonely shut in. Very weird slide. I see your "handle" and your profile pic refer to a dog. Hopefully, you get a lot of comfort from your furball. Envious.
Oh, so good to hear, you're free! Very encouraging to hear, but, goodness, 5 years is a long time. Every once in awhile, I think I'll get better too . . I really do. It's been two years for me now - I never anticipated the agoraphobia would last so long, though when I look back and see how far I've come (I have!) I pat myself on the back. I didn't take care of myself back then and now I'm so much better at doing that. It must have been awful when your family and friends didn't understand. You know, the way agoraphobia is represented in movies is ridiculous. Hollywood always makes the agoraphobic insane. Again, glad you're doing so much better. Thanks, for your support.
I, agree, with all the posts & have done similar --Have had & have Panic Disorder, OCD, GAD (don't like to use diagnoses, but just to let you know). Many things helped me over the years, tho., I still struggle, at times. Recent loses (I am a bit older than you) of my Mom, my Sig. Other, friends, the Pandemic, etc. increased my anxiety; however, I find that retreating in fear (which I used to do) only makes you More fearful! If you haven't, as yet, Read Dr. Claire Weekes book, Hope & Help for your Nerves --This, helped me Greatly to go out alone --it's took time & practice, but I can be sure if you Practice the method in Dr. Weekes books, you will find that you Will be able to go out of your house & almost anywhere! Another book of Dr. Weekes is: Peace from Nervous Suffering (much on Agoraphobia in that book). Her books may be under slightly different names, but look up Dr. Claire Weeks. Her books of long ago are Much relevant today as they were then!
Yes, it was the losses in my life that triggered the agoraphobia - it began as form of grieving. It's good to hear you've faced your fears and have learned to deal with them. I googled Dr. Claire Weeks and there is much written about her and her books. She's interesting in and of herself; the fact that she has an historical place in the study and research of anxiety, is fascinating. I read that she was a pioneer in the treatment of anxiety. Thanks so much for your reference. I look forward to reading her.
Yes, she was a pioneer & many current therapists refer to her today! When you read her books, it's like she is sitting right next to you, like she knows Exactly what you are thinking & what you are Afraid of. Because, it's mostly about Fear! And, it is part of our human nature to be fearful; but, as Dr. Weeks says in Peace from Nervous Suffering --it's the Intensity of the fear & its constant presence (paraphrasing here) that makes that is the problem, and to heal, we must reduce intensity & the continuing of the fear. You will find her writing so clear, and she comes across as very kind & understanding.
Hello. Nice to virtual meet you. I have a son, 30 who is agoraphobic. It is breaking my heart. He started having panic attacks at age 10. We are constantly trying to get him help. I am always hopeful and will never give up on him. It is nice to connect with someone who is agoraphobic as well. I hope you write back and we can share ideas and how to work through this.
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