Feeling Alone

[FriedaLola5]

It's hard to even write this because I feel like what I'm feeling makes no sense. I'm lonely and sad. I feel alone but I know I have people I could reach out to and they'd listen. But I don't want them there for me because I'll just burden them. Then when I shut down, everyone tells me I'm being weird. So, what's the answer? What do I do?

[FuzzyBabyDaddy]

May I say that your post here hits so close to home with me. I just joined the community and your post is the first I come upon and what you say hits dead on with how I feel too many times. To be honest with you, I cannot answer your question because I ask the same thing when I get the same way. I am only touching base with you because your position is not foreign to me. What I can tell you, and what I should do myself, even though I do not most times, is reach out to someone you know that loves you. Just tell them how you are are feeling at the moment. Burden them. If they love you, you will not be a burden to them. Listen to me; I should practice what I preach. Please, talk to your family or friend, tell them how you feel.

[gajh in reply to FuzzyBabyDaddy]

Hello and Welcome to you too Fuzzybabydaddy. I am glad you have joined us.

[gajh]

Hello and Welcome. You have come to the right place. You can talk to us here without having to worry about being a burden.

[Charlysangel]

have a look into red tent circles or a hobby group you could meet up with even. Are you interested in exploring a new hobby? Join up with a local college or uni to do an evening course . Join a local volunteering group or hiking group or even a local yoga or meditation group. Sometimes it helps to get out of our head and into one thing else. Perhaps your GP can refer you for CBT or a local gym. There are local companionship schemes or offer to walk someone’s dog. These all help improve your mental health and focus.

[Sunrisetabby]

I think the answer to your question, at least for myself, involves trying to figure out and do what actually bring me meaning and contentment. If I am miserable I don't want to make other people miserable. I have found almost all the available self-help tools and TED talks to be quite flawed, but there are an abundance of resources to give you ideas. This Yale open course is just one of many: oyc.yale.edu/psychology/psy... There is also some merit to the often recommended Viktor Frankl word salad of Man's Search for Meaning. For me, the approach to an answer - no real answer - involves sunshine and physical activity. If I want to get better I need to sleep better, and I'd I don't get outside and move then I will not be able to sleep as well. Just seeing and smelling the plants and trees, feeling the wind, hearing th birds, perhaps playing with a pet, not answers, but a bit of peace, a bit less darkness for myself. Then it is often easier to deal with people. I don't like myself, to say nothing of others, but after some sleep and sunshine and excercise then, slowly, it becomes easier to be around people again, because I am no longer bringing them down instead, I am asking them to get out and go for a walk to see the sunshine and experience nature and it sounds so silly and trite writing but it does seem to work for me, or at least, I know that being miserable and staying in bed and not sleeping well does not work for me or for the people I care about.

[Stacey2024]

Good morning. I can completely relate as well. I just went through and am continuing to go through a very traumatic medical experience which left me with severe anxiety then depression. I got to the point of feeling like I was a burden too and told them that. The ones who truly believed in me and wanted me to get better no matter the ups and downs stood by me. Express your feelings and be vulnerable, it's HARD no question about it. Get into therapy asap and see a psychiatrist or pcp as well. I worked in psychiatry for over 10 years and even knowing the challenges people face I still felt ashamed to ask for help. I opened up to my closest drs that i worked with and they were so compassionate, non judgemental, and encouraging. It's time to focus just on you. I know it can be hard especially if you're a independent strong person but you really must take time for yourself and believe and love yourself. There is a brighter side and I didn't want to be patient either but I think I'm starting to see it. Hang in there, you're worth it!🥰