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Should I tell my mental health nurse about my son?

Dodoguitarman profile image
13 Replies

My son is on a very strict prison licence. Probation the police got to come here once a week and he has to see a drug Councillor. I've spoilt him but the big mistake was buying him an XL bully. I thought he look after it properly because he's always wanted them. Thing is they are now banned and strict laws put on them. My son isn't getting up in the morning. The dog is waiting till 1pm or 2 pm just for him to get up. I told him I can look after him because I'm thin and ill , I haven't the strength nor will. So I said please get up the dog is climbing the walls to go out. He went berserk. Brought up silly paranoid things like I'm trying to do his head in. All I've done is spend money on him buying clothes to his pot. I make him a smoothie cause I can eat solid food. He complained about that. There is food here plenty. Why can he throw chips and chicken nuggets in the air fryers. I make smoothie for myself and him mixed veg eggs yogurt shredded wheat. He told me he been letting the dog off lead which is now a big no no. Anyone take a photo the police will know who it is straight away lose the dog and might go to prison. He's got to get up earlier than 2 in the afternoon and teach the dog to obedience. He went on such a rant when I woke him I had to leave the house and talked to my daughter who was angry cause she knows o been good to him and his brother cause he'd be homeless. My boy started saying some scary stuff. What do I do. Give him a warning a second chance do I tell his probation who will lock him up that day and take his dog. I can't live like this. I didn't want this dog I wanted a jack Russell or small Patterdale not a monster with a reputation of killing people. It started off because he keeps taking the collar off the only thing I can use to hold him back. A drunk girl walked in 4 o clock in the morning XL bully went nasty but I had him by the collar and I was lying down feet again arm od chair. If it wasn't for the collar Bully could of bitten her face off she didn't seem concerned about the horrible growling he was making and as she sat down he was inches away from her face. I told he to please go your upsetting the dog and its dangerous. Turns out she knew my boy but she did some things behind his back and they are nor friends at all it was all so surreal. Still my boy took the collar off even when I tried to explain the importance of the collar. I also said don't give him more the 6 feet lead. He didn't listen and th dog ripped my boy off his feet. He's seems not to take things in important things. It's frustrating and dangerous and if it persist I'm going to have to inform his people. For all our safety. It's hurting me real bad. Overwhelming plus I'm trying to reduce my diazepam intake which is trebly hard like today. I've bitten of more than I can handle I think. Plus the the giving of money nearly daily got to stop I can't afford it anymore. Its going to ne a nightmare because it'll be my fault. I not living in fear like I did with my father. Its already affecting my health. I have Achalasia and I can't eat or drink some nights and I can't be dealing with big dogs and big children but that's how it looks. See how it goes tomorrow if the collar is off I'm going for a drive and telling his probation officer every. I got to or I want ladt the year. The stress is already stopping me eating my smoothie.

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Dodoguitarman
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13 Replies
Ellamaye profile image
Ellamaye

Thank you for posting. Please re read your post because it basically says to yourself that what your dealing with is too much for you and lists the reasons why. Your thoughts about the dog are valid. Xl bully's in my opinion are not dangerous dogs but the owners of them are a problem. To own a large dog who needs guidance and big exercise and stimulation can't be owned by someone in your position as you've stated. But also not by someone in his situation. You forsee the possible danger ahead and have voiced it on HU so please listen to your own words of wisdom and put it right as best you can. We will support you so if step by step you need to be supported the reach out. Your son is obviously having his own struggles and probably can't or won't recognise the effects on you x

Agora1 profile image
Agora1

Dodo, time to reach out for help for both you and your son. As Ellamaye stated

re-read your post and you will see the answer within yourself as to what you need

to do asap. It's not going to get any better my friend. You must now take care of

your well being both mentally and physically.

I'm glad you are reaching out to the community to support your decisions.

I'm so sorry you are going through this pain right now. Absolutely tell your mental

health nurse what's been going on. You must come first in this instance with no

guilt. :) xx

Ellamaye profile image
Ellamaye in reply toAgora1

Oh yes I agree with angora I also think tell your mental health professional. No guilt required. You need someone on your side x

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14

Dodoguitarman

May I ask what an XL Bully is?

With all due respect it sounds like you are enabling your son. Your therapist needs to help you learn how to set boundaries.

You have your own issues and shouldn't be taking on his responsibilities. He sounds aggressive and abusive.

I'm not sure how old he is or what his probation is regarding. I'm not asking for the information, I'm just concerned after reading your post

🐬

bethelbee profile image
bethelbee in reply toDolphin14

An XL Bully is a pitbull, a dog that often has a bad reputation.

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply tobethelbee

Thank you so much.

❤️🐬

bethelbee profile image
bethelbee in reply toDolphin14

You're welcome!

Jcwy profile image
Jcwy in reply tobethelbee

yes because of idiot people that do not care for them properly or are using them for fighting

bethelbee profile image
bethelbee in reply toJcwy

You're right, it's all how the dog is raised and trained. Many pitties are sweet dogs

Jcwy profile image
Jcwy in reply tobethelbee

Yes, me too, we we were blessed to have our furbaby for 12 years, she was the sweetest,most gentle,loving being. We lost her in October , still everyday it floods back that she isn’t here. It’s been a nightmare

bethelbee profile image
bethelbee in reply toJcwy

Sorry about your loss.. So hard to lose our furbabies. In August I lost my almost 19 year old kitty I had had since she was 2. In September I adopted two rescues who are littermates; they turned 2 yesterday..

Jcwy profile image
Jcwy in reply tobethelbee

I’m sorry for the loss of your kitty, 19, wow! That is amazing!

bethelbee profile image
bethelbee

Yes, talk to your mental health nurse about your son and the situation. And as pointed out it is time to set boundaries with your son. It is not fair to you what he is doing. Tell him he needs to take care of the dog or the dog must go; it's not fair to you or the dog. And tell him you will no longer pay for things that aren't necessary. Your health is at stake; it is not fair to you. And I would definitely talk to his probation officer.

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