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Caregiver struggles

Magic8 profile image
6 Replies

Hi all,

About 5 months ago I relocated to move in with my brother and sister-in-law due to severe anxiety and depression that had started almost a year and a half prior. I was living alone and had no social support and my family (all of whom live in different states) was concerned for my safety as I was only getting worse. My brother and sister-in-law were more than happy to take me in. They didn’t give it a second thought.

Fast forward to today and I’m still suffering, having failed 2 more medication trials. I’m finding a lack of empathy from them, like they have expectations I’m not meeting. My sister-in-law barely speaks to me. I’ve expressed these feelings to them and they’ve said well we do expect progress and it doesn’t seem like you’re making any. I’ve tried to educate them on what depression and anxiety are like but they admittedly don’t understand it.

Has anyone experienced something similar and if so did you find anything that helped? I suggested they find a support group, which my brother is doing but it’s for caregivers in general, not specific to anxiety and depression. I suggested one specific to depression and my brother was like “yeah that might be good” but he hasn't mentioned it since. It just feels like less of a team effort and more a….I can’t think of the right term but a situation where I’m being evaluated. I can feel a stark separation between “me” and “them.” I think they bit off more than they could chew. I told my brother this and he didn’t confirm or deny it…

I’m getting to the point where I feel like I need to find an alternative living situation but I don’t have one. I can’t work right now so I can’t afford to live alone. I just don’t think the situation is going to get better until I get better.

If you made it this far thank you for reading ❤️

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Magic8 profile image
Magic8
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6 Replies
gajh profile image
gajh

NAMI National Alliance on Mental Illness offers NAMI Family Support Groups both in person and virtual. It is a peer-led support group for any adult with a loved one who has experienced symptoms of a mental health condition. Gain insight from the challenges and successes of others facing similar experiences.

nami.org/Support-Education/...

Check out the NAMI website to see what else they offer. I hope you find it helpful for you and your family.

gajh profile image
gajh

By the way this is the link to find a support group for yourself.

nami.org/Support-Education/...

In person and virtual.

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic

Hang in there. To be honest with you I think most people who do not struggle with anxiety disorders or depression disorders or other mental health disorders or conditions can be empathetic and supportive but can have moments of aversion to lack of progress. Or be annoyed or irritated as if it’s in the persons control to do better or be better. Sometimes it’s a roller coaster until it starts looking up. If you’re comfortable try talking to them and just sharing your feelings recently and also your gratitude, but making sure to remind them this is an active ongoing struggle and you are actively working on it. Prayers up.

Lizzie6040 profile image
Lizzie6040

I struggle with Depression/Anxiety even social phobia. I think the hardest part is getting immediate help. Most free provided services will have a 24hr wait time for really basic general support not individuality so things go untreated. I don't like groups as if you want to really talk about yourself to Others, really. Another issue to get left "Untreated". I sound pessimistic but, reality is everyone is different & getting fixed up to be Normal like without the Depression/Anxiety etc is most probably getting professional non selfish POV treatment from Psychiatrist(s)/Psychologists & GP's.

Teaching profile image
Teaching

So sorry you are going through a tough time. Anyone without anxiety or depression will not understand you or what you are going through including health professionals. I suggest you give them a little gap and do your research yourself. Only you can help yourself to an extent. Don't give up. I had same experience with people around me but decided to move on without anyone. It's very hard but you will be glad you did.

Weatherwoman profile image
Weatherwoman

Was in a similar situation as yours! My Sig. Other passed away a little over a year ago. I had no place to go after the house was sold (Very long story). Proceeds from the house are still in probate. Only living on my Soc. Sec., I could not afford anything & would have been homeless, out in the street if my Brother & Sister-in-law didn't take me in. I, also, have & suffer from Anxiety & some depression. My Brother & Sister-in-law didn't want me there, really, and I didn't want to be there. They were/are very critical, and judgemental. It was rough being with them, but I had put in applications for HUD Subsidized Housing. I am living alone now after many Months of living with them. While I am glad to have my own place, and they are glad, too, it isn't easy as I am older, alone, and Scared. Scared that if I get ill & All Alone --that Terrifies me. But, I suppose I would have to go to the ER if that should happen! Being on your own with perhaps support help (know they have Supportative Housing) is my suggestion, That will not be easy to come by, but call the affordable housing in your area, and at least while you are living with them, you will have something to back you up. Just a suggestion. NAMI was suggested, and that's good, too! Good luck to you.

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