hey,I am new to the community.
Can somebody help me with the methods to control anxiety, I constantly feel overwhelmed and unable to control the normal situations in my life(which i am very well able to control) i feel lost and unmotivated to do stuff. I feel i have fallen into a rut and dont know how to come out of it.
WelcomeI'm feeling kind of bad today myself. But walking helps me. In my emails today, the Tapping method which I always forget to use when I need it. Decrease caffeine which I'm bad about letting it increase. . And meditations where you focus inward. I'm sure some other people on here will have more to offer.
I too have a lack of motivation. A lot of it's caused from depression. Some of it I guess it's just my personality.
Hi Vinnie! I am so sorry to hear you are experiencing this, I completely understand what you are going through. Something that has helped me is this method: whenever I get anxious and start to spiral, I will address the way I am feeling and ask myself "do I want to continue to feel this feeling or do I want to do xyz." While it may not work for the first few times, your brain will start to learn this pattern and will start to show that you have two different options. Eventually, your brain will begin to want to only choose the option that makes you feel less anxious. Also just being overly kind to myself helps too. Instead of being angry with myself for being in a rut, I approach it as if I am talking to a friend. It is better to feel your emotions and not feel guilty for feeling this way. It has really helped me and I hope it can help you too!
i do try this and it helps me but sometimes it feels likes i am continuously doing this only,like imagine giving this talk to urself 3-4 times in a day.Maybe i should keep trying and not get irritated if I have to do it again and again
I also had these thoughts 3-4 times a day, I completely understand. And I got very frustrated that it wasn't working and when people would tell me to do this, but today I only get these thoughts maybe once a day, and it is still improving. The second I leaned into it rather than get frustrated, it helps. You have to be patient with yourself, it is going to take a while, and give yourself encouraging thoughts when trying. Rather than saying "I am mad that I am not seeing changes" say "I am proud of myself for trying" or something like that.
Other recommendations I have are reading whenever you get anxious thoughts--it helps take my mind to a new place and recenter myself a bit. Also, lean into things that make you happy, even if it is little. When I was at my worst, I bit by bit added things to my life that made me happy, starting from having a coffee creamer I really like, all the way to exploring my passions now. If you continually add a little piece of something you like to each day, you will look back and see that you have accumulated so many things that bring you joy.
If you shift your perspective to trying to have a fulfilling day, rather than thinking about your whole life, it helps keep you present and makes it easier to enjoy your time because it is way less intimidating. I know at this stage, it is harder said than done. These are things that just helped me. I hope this helps!
I think most of us are in the same situation, but the support and suggestions do help.
I was just having a conversation with someone on this site about this.
Do you get out of the house and talk with others on a regular basis?
actually no,i am struggling with my career and have been preparing for my competitive exams. And there is no one i talk to except my family.
Hey Vinnie. I can relate to how you’ve been feeling. It is hard being in the place you are describing- feeling stuck in a rut and not knowing what to do. I, too, feel that way often. I find that journaling or talking to the right people can help me. What I mean by the “right people” are those who I feel do not judge me and who genuinely care for my wellbeing. If you are ever feeling lost in the sense that you do not know who you can reach out to, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me here or I can give you my email/socials to reach me as well. You are never alone.
Thankyou!! I did try journally but it hasnt been much helpful whereas regarding sharing i always feel that i will be judged harshly for having such thoughts( though i am aware that the other person wont judge me,i am unable to bring peace with this fact)
Good day if you live in the uk ask your doctor to refer you to rehab classes / or if under a consulant they can do it for you / look in local communtie centre the sometime s have classes going on in witch you pay a fee to join classes as when you go / all the best ghoust rider
Based in India,and it is difficult to consult a doctor right now where i am based.
Hi Vinnie. Sorry to hear you’re feeling like this. You are not alone. I have been there myself many times. A turning point for me was discovering a man called Wim Hof. I watched him on you tube and his breathing techniques have been proven to reduce anxiety and help you control your own brain. It was a game changer for me and I do his breathing at least twice a day. Very powerful stuff- worth a try. Let me know if you want me to send you any links.
Dear Vinnie, Hang in there, you are not alone! We all go through times like those you describe, but they don't last forever. Spring will come, energy and hope will return, and you will feel better before too long.
In the meantime, give yourself "self-care" breaks during your exam studying. Every 20 minutes, get up from your books or computer and go look out the window to see the blue sky, budding earth and early robins. Sretch your arms, shoulders and neck, take a deep breath and let it out slowly, telling yourself, "I am smart and well prepared, and I can ACE these tests!"
That 1-minute break will help your eyesight, blood circultion, memory and motivation, as well as your general health, both physical and mental.
Just do yourself a favor and do it! You deserve a break, so be good to yourself.
We are all rooting for you.
Thankyou for the kind words
Hi Vinnie95. Look up Accupressure.
Welcome to the community. The problems you describe are probably shared by 80% of the people in this forum. You have received a lot of advice from other members, and I would certainly agree that things like reading exercises, and meditation and physical exercise are all important. I would also recommend reading a good book on cognitive behavioral therapy, since that will teach you about how your thoughts affect your mood, and how you can use this therapy yourself to help yourself to feel better.
any particular book you suggest?
I would suggest the book Feeling Great by David Burns. It is a very helpful book and it is really foundational in the teaching of cognitive behavioral therapy. Just one note: in order for the book to be effective, you actually have to do all of the exercises that it discusses.
In the United States is available from Amazon in most bookstores. In India, I am not sure where it is available, but if you have access to Amazon, you can purchase it either as a digital book, or as a hardback.
ok
Actually i am getting 'feeling good' by the writer, can i go for it else will be really helpful i you could suggest any other.
Amazon is showing some workbooks on the topic,will they be helpful?
TIA
Vinny95,
Book is available on Amazon either as a digital download or as a hardback. I would not recommend getting the workbooks at this time since they are based on what you have learned from the book. Read Feeling Great first.
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