Hello!
I am new to this online support group thing. I would go to therapy but I have a hard time talking about this with other people because I feel they won't understand. So I turned to this to get some recommendations of coping mechanisms that have worked for other people and to just have people to talk to about all of this.
I would try therapy at least once I know it's hard talking about your problems or life in general but having professional does help alot. If you want recommendations for other options are wanting more in person connections, options to self improvement through reading recommendations, or having like general conversations. The sky is limit on options just may need more info about yourself for more in depth recommendations.
I have tried therapy before and it wasn't really helpful. It could have just been the wrong time or wrong therapist.
also thank you for responding to me!
I try to help as much as I can. That's true could be a step you wasn't ready. I won't lie it took along time myself to get to therapist that helped. I had a bad experience once and took awhile to make that step. A good therapist will always want the best for their client, they will tell you if we don't vibe we will help find one that you do vibe. If you okay do you like reading I could recommend some books that help me. Am still learning myself and always up for recommendations from others as well.
I would love for some book recommendations, I haven't read in a while but I would love a reason to get back into it
Permission to feel by Marc Brackett, the mountain is you by Elaine hogan, set boundaries, find peace by nedra glover, are the few I read the last 2 months. If you gave library card you could use libby as an app to have free audio books that way you can see if you like these titles before buying.
Thank you so much! I'll look into these
hiccup11
Welcome to the community.
Are you able to share a bit more about yourself? Do you have anxiety/ depression or both?
As Dragoonlady states it's hard to help without knowing the general issues you are dealing with
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Oh, i'm sorry I thought I had put that in there. I have anxiety and depression, was diagnosed last year but I have been struggling with it my whole life. It just got worse after COVID because I was in my home for almost a year and I got comfortable living that way. Now, I have trouble leaving my house without making myself physically sick because of my nerves. I take medication for it but i still get nervous to leave and be out there. I'm trying to find some coping mechanisms to help calm down my nerves while going out.
I apologize. I didn't scroll down all the way to see your bio.
So many people struggled with this post Covid. Do you take the medication right before you go out? How do you feel once you are out in public?
This is a great place to be for support.
@gajh is indicating this is something she can speak to.
I used to take medicine before I left the house but it made me very sleepy so I don't take it anymore.
When I am out in public I feel as if everyone is out to get me, if that makes sense. Like its all eyes on me. But I also overthink EVERYTHING so I'm sitting there planning out the worst outcomes before it happens. Then I get nervous and start to feel sick and then I eventually just go home and be disappointed in myself.
This all sounds familiar.
When I was going through this I made very short trips out. I would do what I needed to and then go home. It's all about starting off slow.
Do you work or go to school?
I used to work but I quit my job because I wasn't mentally well and it wasn't helping that.
I understand how very difficult that can be
I am trying to find another job that isn't too bad but there isn't much where I live
Take your time. It's best to get through what you are experiencing before you put pressure on yourself to show up for a job. It's best to go slow
Hi Hiccup11I would recommend any publication that advocates acceptance [of all symptoms] as the way to recover.
I bought a self help book called Essential Help for your Nerves by Dr Claire Weekes, taught me about anxiety and depression [knowledge is power] and followed her teachings in full by facing my perceived fears, accepting the symptoms come what may, floating past them [being ok about not feeling ok] and letting time pass [time is the healer].
I have fully recovered and the reason I keep mentioning the book.
I've also posted lots of information about recovery on this forum that you might find helpful.
Best wishes ❤️
Hello and Welcome. I just read your Bio boy can I relate when you said "Once the quarantine was lifted, I had trouble leaving the house because I was so comfortable and safe there." You said you have a hard time talking about this with other people because you feel they won't understand. You have definitely come to the right place to talk to people who can understand. I would be more than happy to talk to you more about this.
Welcome hiccup! I am a big fan of therapy, but I understand that finding the right one is hard. It is a drag that you have to go out and be social to find a therapy to work on some social anxiety.
I love the book "Feeling Great" by David Burns, and there is the Feeling Good podcast that goes along with it and you could find topics to listen to you might like. He talks about turning down our anxiety, not eliminating it, because it exists for a reason and communicates stuff to us. It is akin to acceptance therapy.
There is also a book by Marc Manson called "The subtle art of not giving a F***" that is a bit about how we are all in our own world. I wish you peace on your journey☮️
Thank you! those seem interesting, I'll look into them
welcome to the group. You will find great people here just like yourself, they understand. I was against therapy too but got to a point I needed it. I did online first so I didn’t have to see anyone or talk to them. It was through chat. I didn’t fit with the first therapist but the second one helped me a lot. Just a thought. It seems Covid changed a lot of people from wanting or being able to go out in public. I struggle with that myself. My husband and daughter pressure me to go out and do things. If they didn’t I would never leave the house. Do you have a friend or someone that can do things with?
Wow! That’s a heavy burden to carry. I can share what works for me. Let me know if you questions.
I fell and shattered my ankle in December and my anxiety about leaving the house and getting out and about has changed for me.
My employer has a partnership with LiveHealth so my copay is almost zero. I was hesitant to try this platform at first, but when I realized I could have control over scheduling and also see the same therapist, it was a game changer. It took me a few times to find the right one for me and it’s been great connecting with her weekly. I love that I don’t have to leave the house to see her.
What do you enjoy reading? I enjoy a good romance or a book the makes me smile. I’m slowly getting into ‘The Body Keeps Score’ and many things really resonate with me. I try to balance that with a fiction that has an HEA.
Recently I have had blood pressure spikes and a high resting heart rate. I am learning the signs and trying to relax and talk myself through it. Yesterday my face was red, very warm, and I felt a little light headed. I took a break by watching mindless TV for a few while just deep breathing occasionally to calm myself.
I’ve had these things for years and what worked ten years ago may not work now. Something that worked for me during Covid was learning more about the last plague and how it was handled. Once I felt educated on the subject and realized that life did eventually go on helped. I understand the meaning of ‘Knowledge Is Power’ now.
So this was a huge hodgepodge of what has worked for me. I don’t know much about the therapy available on other service platforms and was hesitant to name the one I use above, but I figured it could help. They are not perfect but I made a real connection with my therapist and she is exactly what I need.
I hope something out my long reply helps or gives inspiration. The main thing is that you can do this. You got this. This is your reminder in case you need one. Good luck! 
Give therapy a chance (individual, not group). Your counselor will keep confidential anything you tell him/her.
Welcome to the community! It's hard to open up to people especially when they don't understand. I think you need a trusted therapist or someone else. It took me time to start opening up to my therapist too.
Welcome to the group, hope you get some relief and understanding here, great bunch folks here that have troubles w daily life...stick around
welcome to this group. I think you will find that there are many very supportive people here. The first question I would have to ask you is what is the nature of the problems that you are having? It would be useful to understand more about what you need help with.
With regard to your concerns about therapy, a good therapist should be able to establish a good relationship with you and provide support. In addition, he or she will then proceed with additional therapeutic methods that you are comfortable with. I think sometimes the hardest part of psychotherapy is making the decision to begin
In the meantime, you may wish to do a little work on your own by reading a book on psychotherapy, and how you can use it for yourself. I generally recommend the book Feeling Great by David Burns. It is a legitimate instructional text for learning cognitive behavioral therapy and can be quite effective. Others will also have recommendations for books they found helpful.
Hello i have done DBT and CBT don't work for me, i may feel a bit btter in mood in the one on one Therapy but the happy normal feeling don't last long with me, i just fade back into my depressive way of thinking and rapid thoughts that go a 1000 mile an hour through my mind, like my mind repeats words and sentances in my mind over and over.
Try another therapist; it can really help with the right one and you get immediate feedback and often things you can work on for your hext visit. Being on here is helpful and we certainly understand and can relate, but often have to wait for responses since it's an international site. Plus the site is mostly for support, not necessarily advice since we are not professionals.
Hi Hiccup11, I have also been through this. I didn’t want to leave my house either for the same reasons. I’m so afraid of getting severe panic attacks.
It is not easy to find the right therapist and psychiatrist. I finally found the right ones I believe. My Dr said it was ok to take a caffeine pill with my anti anxiety pill because I also was very sleepy from it. I plan to ween myself off those by 9 months or so. Meanwhile, I have read the Hope and Help with Your Nerves by Dr Claire Weeks. She explains how to get through it very well.
I am about to get TMS treatment because I am willing to do everything to get better. It has proven to be much more affective than meds. I will post how it works for me
Don’t give up, there is hope to improve your symptoms! You are definitely not alone!
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