Lying to people I meet

[GhostRobin]

Tired of being so isolated. I am putting myself out there now, but I don't want to scare people away with my normal depressed personality. So on top of the extra energy it takes just to go out, I have to use more energy to put on a front and act happy. It makes me feel like I am lying to everyone around me. Sometimes, though, I am able to actually lose myself in whatever I am doing and have normal interactions, and that usually makes it worth it.

[Shnookie]

I am not lying when I go into work as a receptionist in a lousy mood. Rather I go into my role as an actress and complete the job in front of me.

[hypercat54]

There is a huge middle ground between being a depressive personality and pretending everything is great. Try and aim for that instead as that would be less pressure on you.

[GhostRobin in reply to hypercat54]

Thanks for your thoughts. The more steps I take the easier it is to build up some confidence and not worry so much!

[jadeite11]

Well done to you for keep trying.. It sounds like you have moments of enjoyment. Try to stop worrying about what people think and be yourself, you may find other people have similar problems x I wish you well 🦋

[GhostRobin in reply to jadeite11]

Thank you! Self acceptance and being open are both valuable for sure!

[jadeite11 in reply to GhostRobin]

Your welcome, I also wonder if you are putting yourself down too much.. Maybe you dont come accross that way to people all the time. Perhaps you re being abit hard on yourself. I get down sometimes, but still I laugh at times, and the friends that most like me like my eccentricity too. Alot of writers and famous people have suffered with depression x Best wishes to you x

[Shnookie in reply to jadeite11]

If I feel depressed, I can’t show it at work. Where I work, people are very perceptive. I’m a receptionist and need to project a positive attitude. I also need to deal with resident’s personal issues as well. I’ve received compliments fort how empathetic I am. It depends on the situation, where one can reveal their true self.

[LifeIsThePitts]

youtu.be/gux48f1vWWo?si=bdL...(Not working as expected?)

For a bit of laughter, your post reminded me of this scene from the Big bang theory... Stuart and Raj are creating online dating profiles 😂

On a serious note, it's ok to be yourself. I tried for nearly 48 years to be whatever I thought those around me wanted me to be. Therefore I have no clue who I am as an adult. I've lost myself in trying to fit in with a society that I don't even agree with.

I'll be 50 next year. I'm going to be a depressed and anxious survivor, not a victim to my conditions any longer. I'm perfectly fine the way I am and I can develop healthy ways to Accept myself instead of trying to be someone I'm not. I think that's been a HUGE contributor for my anxiousness.... not being True to MYSELF.

Take care of YOU 💓

[GhostRobin in reply to LifeIsThePitts]

Thank you very much! Allowing myself to not be OK is something I have worked on in counseling and I agree it has helped my anxiety as well

[kbrauer]

Good morning,

I understand trying to get out there and make people like you! I grew up a extremely shy person. I had know real friends that I hung around with in school. I knew of some neighboring kids who lived up the road from me. We rode the same bus together for 12 years, but really did not do much together. -I had big dreams of what I was going to do after I graduated high school. I daydreamed a lot. After high school, I went to a Bible college, and I became even more shy, but I wanted to escape that shyness and make some friends. Fortunately, there were very friendly students there who never gave up on me. So, I started to open up a little bit. - A brief tid bit about myself ( I grew up on a horse ranch. My mom was a horse trainer and my dad bred the horses and was a truck driver. We raised appaloosas, showed horses and belonged to a horse club, which we were very involved in.) - Okay, enough about that, lol!

Well, anyway, so these very friendly and out going students who wanted to become friends with me, I started opening up to them, and started dreaming up these big stories about our horses and the accomplishment that I achieved with them) and telling the stories to them. ( I did not think that anyone would like me for the little lowly person that I was. So, I made myself out to be a bigger and better person than who I was).

I am thankful that this was only at college at the time that this happened. But, you know, I never felt comfortable or at peace when I was telling those lies to those kids all those years back. After graduating college, I never saw those students again. But for the longest time, I was not at peace with myself of what I had done back then and, I did not know how to make things right with them, because we all went our separate ways after college. However, I did know that I had to take my own step and ask the Lord to forgive me for all those lies and made up stories I told back then. Once I had asked for His forgiveness, my heart and mind was set free from the guilt of carrying around that heavy burden all those years.

" Forgiveness is an amazing tool to set us free from the guilt of any wrong doing that we have done towards another." - 1John 1:9

God bless you!

[Nothing_but_books in reply to kbrauer]

You've reminded me of something I used to do, long years ago. I took public transportation everywhere then. Buses, trains, planes.

When I got talking to someone I knew I'd never meet again, I'd go into story mode. I never thought of it as lying, I wasn't trying to take advantage. Just a short escape from reality, knowing there wouldn't be any consequences. I don't recall ever going too far, no goblins or genies anyway. Just a bit of romanticizing. It was nice, and I can't imagine it hurt anyone.

[Trainchaser]

Sometimes while a lot of times it is easier to act happy versus telling someone how you really feel. And acting can be difficult if you are going through level 10 anxiety or depression

[Jennblank7734]

I can relate. I tried to pull off normal and it isn't going well. In my experiences, some of the people in the most denial or that don't understand mental illness often exhibit some strong symptoms of having one. I got told that it's because I have a weak mind. If you can lose yourself in the time out, I think that's wonderful. Good luck and please let me know how you're doing =)

Jennifer