I feel like reaching out for help only makes it worse. Got better but had a talk with my psychiatrist and got triggered

[Against_the_current]

Especially by saying mom and sis might have problems. I can't make them go to therapy and knowing the therapy here, they will get worse. In Bulgaria you should just bury your problems or bury yourself. Or saying i should go to university city. I'm fully blocked. I can't take care of myself. I can't, i shouldn't have talked to him. And said im impulsive and said to take convulex but I'm already on Clonasepam, sertaline, levide and pregabalin. Worried about getting so much meds at my age because of my mom being unable to control herself and her victim complex and not listening to anyone. I just need support, no triggers, judgement, scams and so. I'm a victim of systematic abuse with disfunction due to cptsd, anxiety and depression. Can't they just support me and help to heal? I already know myself. Everyone say im taking too much drugs. I'm hopeless. The more help i seek, the worse. I had just calmed down and when he mentioned sis might get an anxiety disorder and mom's brain chemistry, i couldn't even lose it again because im already lost. I can't function. I can't even do things that bring me joy. I needed a rational putlook and how mom won't do this and reassurance and support. It's getting dark and my demons crawl. I was just doing better

[SoporRose]

You ask, "Can't they just support me and help to heal? " But I think you know that the answer is that they can't. They don't have the capability to care for you to the extent you want them to do. But I think your folks do what is within their capacity. Your dad and grandparents support you financially. Your mom gives you a place to live, takes care of you when you come home from the hospital, doesn't ask too much from you in the way of chores, and feeds you, no? I think this is what they can do to show their love.

I know you need more support than you're getting, but if you keep expecting to get it from your parents, they're just going to keep disappointing you. It's not fair. I wish I could tell you where you could get the help you need.

You mentioned "day care" in a different post. What does that offer?

[TangledUpIn in reply to SoporRose]

Wow SoporRose, you really got the gist of against_the_current's problems. I want to offer helpful suggestions, but I couldn't get my head around what was even going on 🤔

[SoporRose in reply to TangledUpIn]

I’ve been reading AtC’s posts for a long time now and trying to support her. But I don’t know that I ever make a difference.

[SoporRose]

AtC,

I’m thinking of you and hoping your classes are going well.

Ruth