Relatives are often our enemies.

[secrets22]

Just a misplaced word and often relatives will turn things against you and make everything your fault.

I have many relatives but only one i talk often with.

I cant go into much detail but i was quite close to a nephew who to be fair was very helpful at one stage, bearing in mind i am also very generous and this nephew was going to inherit a big slice of my considerable portfolio, and he knew this, but when he phoned me just before Christmas 2 years ago, wishing me a good Christmas but not asking what or if i would be doing anything over the holiday, i snapped, I said nothing but put the phone down. Knowing i had not long lost my soulmate I felt it hurtful that they couldn't invite me to their home for the day.

They have all been here for meals in the past and have been made very welcome, but it means nothing.

Since then its been very lukewarm and only had fleeting contact on Facebook, but recently I decided to delete him and my 2 nieces on Facebook because they never make a comment on anything i do, and suddenly i am the bad one. I have to just let it go now.

Am I wrong.?

[Arymretep]

That’s so sad, families can be so hurtful sometimes, were they there for you after you lost your partner, if not I can understand how you feel. I have lots of nieces and nephews too who I’ve always been there for but they seem to have forgotten that now except for one or two of them, I think sometimes it’s an age thing, we were brought up differently .

[secrets22 in reply to Arymretep]

Nope, they were not here for me when my David passed.

[Arymretep in reply to secrets22]

Well you have nothing to thank them for then, don’t worry, what goes around comes around

[MadBunny]

Tell me about it ! I haven't spoken to or heard from my elder brother since Mum's funeral in 2011. I wasn't told about the funeral, or involved in the preparations. I only found out about it from my younger brother. The problem is my toxic sister in law (long story, too much detail to go into) . She didn't even let me know when he had a heart attack and when my aunt asked if she should let me know, S I L just said ' you can if you want to , it's up to you '. I found out that she'd had a massive argument with my younger brother's partner and because I was close to him, she turned on me. Even though I wasn't even there or involved in it . No , you are not wrong, Secrets. Like you , I have been close to nieces and nephew, but I rarely hear from any of them. I haven't seen my younger brother and his family since pre covid, it seems they always have an excuse not to visit, or for me to visit them. And yet I've always been so welcoming and generous. It hurts. I appreciate they have busy lives but I feel thatbif you really want to do something you'll find the time. I've given up making all the effort . Their loss.

Apologies for the rant 🤗

[secrets22 in reply to MadBunny]

hello MadBunny......please rant as much as you need cause you know exactly what its like to be ignored by family, and as far as i'm concerned they can all buzz off, i'm done with em.x

[MadBunny in reply to secrets22]

Me too. Although my language would be stronger than ' buzz off' x

[secrets22 in reply to MadBunny]

i call them scrunts.😱🤣

[MadBunny in reply to secrets22]

I'll have to remember that word 🤣

[Turnipgirl in reply to secrets22]

Back in July my mother had been rude to me one too many times and I decided best thing to do was save myself the upset and not bother with her and it was the right thing to have done as well!

[Turnipgirl in reply to MadBunny]

That's what I think if you really do want to see someone you will shift heaven and earth to make it happen!

How are you and Dylan getting on?

Baby is great and still getting spoilt!

[MadBunny in reply to Turnipgirl]

Absolutely! We're OK thanks .

[Turnipgirl]

Back in the April of 2021 it was a Sunday morning and I had a feeling something awful was about to happen and had gone out for my Sunday walk and it had been 11.30am and I had felt unsettled so we had gone to sit down and I rang my mother up as I just knew something awful had happened and she was short with me and had said at the end of the call that my father had died at 11.30am that morning.

If I hadn't made that call I would have found out by beep beep text which I think is rude and disrespectful when announcing important things like births and deaths!

My friends said how when I had rung them that Sunday in shock and upset and angry before they had picked the phone up they knew what had happened and how they had the feeling something horrible was about to happen as well and agreed with me beep beep text is rude and disrespectful to inform someone of important things like births and deaths and should be done by voice call or face to face and said how where there's no sense there's no feeling either in regard to that!

I haven't spoken to my mother at all since last July after I decided I had had enough of her being rude to me and decided best thing to do was save myself the upset and not bother!

How are you and the dogs getting on?

[secrets22 in reply to Turnipgirl]

Gosh, thats terrible, and you have to save yourself, some people, relations, are not worth the time of day, much better without them. My dogs have been a life saver, without them i dont know how i would be. And your Baby is doing well i see.x

[Turnipgirl in reply to secrets22]

Yes Baby is as fit as a fiddle and as fat as a pig as she is spoilt!

It was the best thing I could have done for myself not contacting my mother after she was rude to me one too many times back in July!

Paradox is being like that she only hurts herself the most!

[Midori]

People get so tied up in their own lives and dramas, that they sometimes cannot see that anyone else is hurting too.

You aren't wrong, I noted that you said you 'were' close; I take it that is no longer the case. I hope they were not being nice for the inheritance.

Families can be such a pain. One of my aunts practically stripped my father's home, before I could get there, as I knew there were certain things he wanted to go to certain sisters and brothers. I was livid, as she arrived while I was out arranging the Funeral. She made off with a lot of stuff, but I had been warned about her ways before, so I managed to get most of it back to give out properly.

Cheers, Midori

[secrets22 in reply to Midori]

I am no longer close, they are off my radar now. But your aunt sounds a slippery one, cripes.

[Midori]

As far as I know, she's gone now.

Cheers, Midori