Worrying is a full time job

[Against_the_current]

I feel better after i cried a lot, read and took a pill but i feel like i shouldn't feel better since my mom has this condition. Everything i enjoyed, i can't do no more. I feel guilty for doing things to callm because mom will still be "an alcoholic" and i will still need to "run away". Just a hug from her made me feel better and was what i need

[Hidden]

I'm so sorry that you're going through a tough time. 😔 Crying can be therapeutic and, it's good seeing that you've calmed down too.

Huggggggg

[Against_the_current in reply to Hidden]

Hugs

[PuzzleArt]

I think you are doing much better, compared to what you wrote before. The part about family is not something that you can change. I have recently been going through similar problems, but with my brother. It has been a tumultuous and up-and-down course. We can't change our ties with family and how we end up, so it makes us very sad sometimes. I sometimes expect perfection when not possible and get very frustrated. I start blaming myself, when I am not alone in causing the situation, or continuing it.

[SoporRose in reply to PuzzleArt]

I agree with PuzzleArt: in some ways you do seem to be getting stronger and handling things better. I think being at home will help you in the long run, if only because there you will have regular meals and clean water. Giving your self time to restore your body can be the foundation on which to re-build your mental health. I'm sorry your mom was drinking, but so glad she understood that you needed tha hug. I hope you told it it helped so she'll keep being affectionate.

You are amazing and have many talents to use and I believe in you.

[Against_the_current in reply to PuzzleArt]

Thank you

[Faith2035]

I wish I was there to give you a hug. Please know your mom has a sickness ( alcoholism) that without a doubt contributes further to her depression. Most likely the fact that your mom is sick and you’re living in a difficult situation it’s what is contributing to yours as well. But under no circumstances should you feel you should not feel better. You do not deserve this, neither does your mom of course. You are precious. Your life is precious. You are living in difficult circumstances it seems. But hang in there don’t run away from home unless you feel your life is in immediate danger. if you’re safe there stay there. Running away solves nothing. Just go for a walk take a breather if needed but don’t place yourself in unnecessary danger. Know that at times a difficult situations seems to last forever but it too shall pass.

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