Break-up

[JoyCroom]

I was dating a man in his 40s since 2016. It's now 2023, and 3 months back things didn't workout so he decided to leave the relationship. While I was with him, there were days he was nice and charming & then there were days I would break down crying around him and he wouldn't care. So our relationship was unusual and often times he was inconsiderate towards my feelings. I am depressed and deal with anxiety, so I was with him but felt like a burden at the same time. Because I was down and talking negative often, I felt he left because I was draining him with my problems. Recently, since the break-up, I've been trying to reach out to him so we could at least talk and come to an understanding...but he doesn't care to talk to me. He made me feel like our love never mattered to him, and it makes me feel sad and lonely. I miss having comfort at night, and by comfort I mean affection and being held close. Unfortunately, all I do now is stay in the house and sob while looking at my cellphone for the day. It's tough. I lost interest into doing fun things.

[Cherryfizz34]

Can relate, therapy helped me and realizing this guy wasn’t so great in the first place. “ I’m okay on my own. I’m an independent 👩🏻 woman”

[CLB1125]

I’m sorry you’re going through this. When we have a break up with think of all the good times. But we forget about the bad. Think of all the times he was uncaring and inconsiderate. Do you really want to go back to that? If he doesn’t want to talk about it with you then it’s time you have to except that. I know that’s easy for me to say. I’m not trying to hurt you. Do whatever you can to take your mind off it. Leave your phone in another room so you’re not tempted to keep looking at it. Pamper yourself, make you the priority now. Take care. And keep posting we’re here

[b1b1b1]

I am sorry this happened, but you have to find a way to move on and accept the fact that this relationship is over. The sooner you can do this, the sooner you will be able to find a more rewarding relationship with someone else.

[STEM_Dad]

It's good that you had the courage to share about your struggle here.

Breakups are hard, and breakups from long term relationships can be especially hard.

It's a common response to experience grief over the loss of a relationship.

You may also be experiencing trauma over the loss.

Try to find a counselor, therapist or psychologist to help you who is trained in treating grief and trauma, relationship problems, and depression.

There is hope. There is healing from the hurt. I've been in recovery from a marriage troubles and divorce for the last couple of years, and I'm now doing much better than I was. I still have an emotional echo every now and then, but I'm not longer living with the hurt like I was at first.

Try to adopt a growth mindset. People who do so tend to thrive once they have recovered from adversity.