I've seen different therapists over the last 3 years for severe anxiety and depression and talk therapy didn't work because absolutely every therapist was making me feel unsafe and it felt very retraumatising. As if I was reviving relational abuse through those therapists. I saw those professionals during an extremely difficult period of my life where I was in such an anxious state that I couldn't even think or manage the situation in any way. Then I took a break from therapy for a while and I eventually recovered without help, although it was extremely difficult and I left many aspects unhealed.
Hence, two years later, I'm now in another anxious/depressive episode and working with a new therapist who is the most compassionate, professional and dedicated professional I have ever met, and I realise that my brain is starting to find reasons to fire her unreasonably (thinking she's too young to understand my problems or that she doesn't have enough experience to treat me because my problems are too complex for instance). So far we've done a course of about 15 sessions and I haven't seen much progress, but I believe it is also due to my complicated life circumstances that are not easy to change either. I truly truly need help and I'm aware that going from one therapist to another won't get me results. what would you do in this situation? Any help will be much appreciated 🌺
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Don't give up! Talk to your therapist about needing to see some change and see if you can come up with something together instead of changing therapists. You said you haven't seen much progress, but it sounds like there has been some progress and that is encouraging. If this therapist is compassionate, dedicated, and professional she should be able to help you take the next step. Hang in there. The fact that you recovered without help before means you can definitely recover this time too, and it will be even easier with help.
I also echo the replies of the first two people above. You should try to stay with this counselor if you have found her "the most compassionate, professional, and dedicated professional I have ever met." A patient gets more help with consistency than changing therapists often. But all therapy takes time to work.
I also suffer from OCD, and I know Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) is very effective, primarily when used with Exposure and Response Prevention therapy (ERP). "The exposure component of ERP refers to practicing confronting the thoughts, images, objects, and situations that make you anxious and provoke your obsessions. The response prevention part of ERP refers to choosing not to do a compulsive behavior once the obsessions have been "triggered." All of this is done under the guidance of a therapist at the beginning ----though you will eventually learn to do it on your own. Over time, the treatment will "retrain your brain" to no longer see the object of the obsessions as a threat." (Google)
I love what gajh said above, "The fact that you recovered without help before means you can definitely recover this time too, and it will be even easier with help." I so agree with this! Be compassionate with yourself, and give the therapy some time. 🤗
I've "fired" therapists before because I FELT as though I knew more about my disorders than they did. In my defense, I was at a intro level mental health factory of crappy therapists and I wasn't nearly as "educated" in my own mental space as I am now. But that isn't an excuse for me to have avoided continuing therapy when I definitely needed it. I'll be 50 next year and just lost my therapist of 6 yrs as my insurance coverage was dropped by him. I was shocked and hurt when the news was dropped on me, but now after a couple weeks, I've realized I was more hurt and felt displaced because losing him wasn't of my choice... that decision was made for me and I resented that due to the emotional connection and "relationship" that occurs when you FINALLY find someone you click with. I thought I'd be with him forever. Que sera sera, whatever will be, will be...as the song goes 🎵🎶😉
Stay with this therapist. Be truthful and let them know you need to be challenged in ways that YOU respond to. They should have ideas and ways to connect with your pattern of needs and emotional support if they're as compassionate as you say. Don't run from the challenge.
maybe add group therapy, to your rehabilitation process? Groups have a dynamic that makes it easy to retreat or speak out as needed in each weekly session.
Thanks. I heard that group therapy can be particularly difficult for people with a story of relational trauma though. I'm worried it could make me worse....
I’m by far no expert or mental health professional. I have been through similar experiences when certain therapists want to emotionally wanna crack you open and are invasive in their approach. Fortunately, I have a therapist that honors my boundaries and meets me where I am at.
I’m not necessarily giving advice because I don’t feel like I’m in a good position to give it. From what I understand and feel is that maybe setting a boundary with your therapist may be beneficial. It is a bit of a gamble and it’s difficult to set boundaries with anyone really if you’re new to setting boundaries and asserting them. I know I’m constantly working on that myself. Maybe clue your therapist in on how you feel if you haven’t already. Maybe let them know your preferences, expectations and position you are in. If they don’t honor that then it’s a clear sign they may not be the therapist for you. It’s hard to find a good therapist to begin with. It’s so hard to find one that has a very healing, supportive and one that can be a good fit. I know I struggled for years and found only two I can say helped me in my years of living with a mental illness.
Don’t give up hope and myself and the rest of the group are here to support you. I hope you can find healing and peace and especially good resources for yourself.
I hope this message encourages you. All I can do as a new member to this group is support you and hold space for you.
Take care of yourself and we are always here for you. 🩵
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