another day

[CLB1125]

sometimes I can stand the thoughts of waking up and facing another day. Today is one of those days…

[Marysblue]

Have you ever seen the Steve Martin movie The Lonely guy. Where his friend says he doesn't take naps he doesn't want to wake up twice in one day and wake up and be shocked of who he is and everything in his life.One of my favorite movie lines but sometimes it rings true. Try to remember all the folks in this world that are worse off than you and believe me there's plenty. Hope you feel better.

[Agora1 in reply to Marysblue]

Hi Marysblue, I love Steve Martin. I will have to take a look at the movie.

We all need to see ourselves in a lighter way. lol xx

[CLB1125 in reply to Marysblue]

i can be having a decent day and my husband will ruin it every time. He always has to put a little jab in there no matter what it is. I just don’t want to face another day being put down. I try to do good and help anyone i can but he just doesn’t want to see it I guess. He only sees my failures. And there’s no talking to him.

[Marysblue in reply to CLB1125]

Oh wow.. does he realize he's doing it.

[CLB1125 in reply to Marysblue]

yes I believe he does. He needs knee replacement surgery but won’t have it done. So he takes his pain out on anyone available. If I say anything about it he says i just won’t talk to you then. And he doesn’t for days. I’m not emotionally strong enough to deal with it.

[Marysblue in reply to CLB1125]

He's in pain and taking it out on you and others. Have you tried marriage counselor with him. I would sure tell him that you're not strong enough to deal with his criticism. Maybe he doesn't even realize he's doing it some of the time. I'm sorry you keep getting hurt like this..

[b1b1b1 in reply to CLB1125]

It sounds like he is frightened of the surgery. If marriage counseling (as suggested by Marysblue) doesn't work, or he won't go, you will have to decide whether or not you can continue to live with him. The other thing you can do is just ignore his pain and take the attitude that if he wants to suffer that is his problem. Men can be like babies when they need medical care. My husband was terrible in this way and it caused a lot of worry and suffering for me. I understand your pain and frustration. x

[CLB1125 in reply to b1b1b1]

he won’t agree to counseling. He doesn’t think anything wrong.

[Tealpillow in reply to CLB1125]

My husband is the same way. Very dismissive and hurtful - and a huge jerk when he is feeling unwell. Sometimes I’m strong enough to talk back & insist he treat me better but sometimes I just ignore him altogether. It’s a daily struggle - I’m so sorry you are going through this as well. Sending you a huge supportive hug!

[Trainchaser in reply to CLB1125]

Sorry you are in the spot you are in. My wife has been a big support to me.

[CLB1125 in reply to Trainchaser]

that helps so much.

[Hidden]

I understand 100%, and, you're not alone. Do you have a mental health provider? Maybe try that... idk. That's one of the things that helps me. Everyone's different though.

✨️ I'm sending you light ✨️ 💛

[CLB1125 in reply to Hidden]

I am talking to an online therapist (phycologist) but doesn’t offer any recommendations, I talk about my childhood, my kids, etc but she has yet to offer coping mechanisms. I had a great counselor but I had to pay out of pocket and with my husband retiring I can’t afford it anymore.

[Hidden in reply to CLB1125]

Ugh. I get it. It's hard to find a therapist/doctor that you connect with. My last therapist was great but, we just got to a point where she wasn't helping so, I moved on.

Maybe try to find another? There's so many you know? BetterHealth or Hers.com are good. Hers is affordable. You seem to need a better therapist. You will get better. Try some grounding skills. There's a site I use called therapist.com it's super helpful. Sorry, I'm dropping links on you. I use a lot of online resources.

Hugs and sending light ✨️✨️✨️✨️

[Trainchaser in reply to CLB1125]

Hope your current counselor get thier act together to help you along the your psth

[Marysblue]

I hear you, I've had multiple counselors and all they do is sit there and listen. It's talk therapy. I think you'll find a lot of coping mechanisms on this site.

[Shivam19]

Exactly know how are you feeling, but clueless about how to conquer this fear and tired of fighting for even little happiness

[Trainchaser in reply to Shivam19]

Been there no fun very frustrating

[Hidden in reply to Shivam19]

I'm feeling that way today Shivam19 . Hang in there!

[SayNOtoPanic]

Sorry you’re feeling this way. Don’t be too hard on yourself and try to not let it take over. Sometimes the people we love being mean or harsh really has an effect especially when you have anxiety disorders or mental health issues. Take moments to yourself like a brisk walk maybe or just sitting outside alone and do some breathing exercises think of positive affirmations about yourself. Big hugs.

[Teaching]

I send love your way. Keep moving!

[piu_1961]

try reading tips from dbtselfhelp.com .. I have found it to be useful. Top coping mechanisms are mindfulness, self compassion, and a few others.....

[mizzou7016]

Ok......you accomplished the main goal of the day....The good lord, or whatever you call your higher power, woke you up to face another day...since you got another day....make the best of it....and sometimes....the best of it means something as simple as moving from the bedroom tv to the living room tv....I have been living by the wake up, show up model here lately....which is I woke up...1st element of every day......waking up....2nd element of my day, depending on what day it is.....is to show up....like today is the 1st day of my work week....I showed up to work...which right now is a struggle for me....one breath at a time.....just relax and breathe.