Rugs was the name of my dog - miss you bud

[iloverugs]

I've had severe depression and anxiety since 2005 while still in high school. I've never learned to manage it well, mostly just hiding in my house and bedroom whenever I could to avoid the world. To be honest, I had pretty much given up about seven years ago, and only just recently realized that there is still hope for me, and that I can get better.

I'm trying to make changes to my lifestyle and get help, but I've realized that I need a social group to help me do so. So I'm posting to this site, and hoping to find a social group with voice chat or in-person meetings soon.

[Nothing_but_books]

Hi iloverugs, Welcome to our group.

Condolences for your loss. Our dogs are our family and confidants. My boy sometimes pretended I was a cow, and he'd body-slam me in line. Thank goodness he stopped before he hit 80 pounds. I miss him.

There isn't a voice chat here, but you may find someone who knows how to help you look.

Have you tried calling 211 to ask about groups? Or checking Meetup?

[iloverugs in reply to Nothing_but_books]

Thanks for the reply. I didn’t know about the number, and honestly forgot about meetup until you mentioned it again. I’ll give both a try.

I miss my dog as well. My boy was just as anxious as I was. He was much more at peace in his later years when he couldn’t hear sudden loud noises anymore 🙃.

[Nothing_but_books in reply to iloverugs]

I hope you had some success.

[iloverugs in reply to Nothing_but_books]

I signed up for a virtual group, but still I'm still working on finding a way to meet somewhere physically, which I think is important for me.

Thanks for the number and reminding me about the app again. I'm pretty reclusive by nature, especially when I'm particularly unwell, and social apps and resources feel very foreign to me.

Also, thanks for reaching out in the first place. I appreciate you helping me and everyone else on this site.

[Nothing_but_books in reply to iloverugs]

You're welcome. Reclusive's my middle name.

[EndUser13]

Welcome to the forum 🙂

[iloverugs]

Thanks!

[catsrock]

Welcome! We're glad you are here.

[iloverugs in reply to catsrock]

Thanks!

[designguy]

Hello and welcome to the group. Love the name Rugs for a dog. You might check out your local NAMI Chapter for in-person groups and see what other groups/meetups they have or know of.

[iloverugs in reply to designguy]

Thanks for replying. I just called them today.

[Montana136]

Hello IloverugsThis is a great platform to be on. I am relatively new I suffer from major depression, generalized anxiety and ptsd. I have gotten really positive feedback really good encouragement and in general just great support here. So welcome I hope you can find what you need. actually I'm pretty sure you will find something that you need here.

I started isolating in my junior year of high school I am now 56 years old and I still find myself hiding as often as I can. I think what I have discovered is that I am intimidated by and a little scared of the world and people in general. Has something to do with childhood abuse. Anyway isolation it feels comforting but I can tell you as a long-term isolator it is not an effective measure to help yourself. If I could do it all over again I would address my fears in therapy and stay on point until I could find some healing and some safety while I was out in the world. It seems, in therapy I addressed every other problem but the core problem. So today I am still isolating and now find myself restless here alone. Sometimes I have to run out my front door just to know that the world continues on outside of this house. I don't necessarily want to talk to anybody I just want to make sure they're still there.

So I've been on a path of healing for the last 6 months I am leaving my house more often and actually on purpose. I have decided to volunteer with my local Humane Society I go visit my mom I go visit my daughter. I do not do this everyday but a little bit at a time and now I leave my house more often. isolation is something I have been doing a long time because I was comfortable with it. now I worry about not living life with the time I have left. I hope something I said has helped you or even just made you feel less alone. Take care of yourself. Be well. Keep posting. ✌️🌈

[iloverugs in reply to Montana136]

Thanks for the message. I’ve been doing a lot better for the last month and a half, but it’s easy to dwell on all my regrets of the past. I’m in constant fear of losing my new optimism and falling back into a depressed, isolated state. It’s happened before, and I know how easy it is to do so again.

[Montana136 in reply to iloverugs]

Yes I agree managing depression is a monumental task. I feel very much like you I've been moving forward for 6 months now and very very scared of losing the pace. Depression always seems to be lurking around the dark corners. I do know what you mean. Talking to you, and this community is helping me so I will keep reading and sharing and posting. Thank you for your words. Take care of yourself and be well

[LifeIsThePitts]

Hey there🤗👋 iloverugs, welcome to our little family of misfits. What a great way to honor rug's memory! Haven, bottom left, passed away Feb '21. But Smokey, top Left, is going on 15& Grace top right, will be 11 in June.

I'm almost 49 and have suffered with crippling anxiety and depression since my teens. Im starting a Psilocybin microdosing study at microdose.me tomorrow, I've been microdosing for 6 days already as I wanted to be microdosing prior to starting the voluntary participation in this global research initiative & I follow all things psychedelics in mental health treatment. I've been participating in another treatment resistant depression forum on HU since last march that has been focusing HEAVILY on Psilocybin and psychedelics for TRD, which is why I'm so Interested in shrooms. I vape med marajuana daily. I've had Ketamine infusions, which are awesome. I've always had a propensity for psychedelic recreational usage. I've eaten hundreds of magic mushrooms 😋 in my recreational past just for fun, and My body chemistry is obviously wired to accept these natural substances as medication.

I've also been paying out of pocket for TMS treatment since Feb '22. TMS, medical marijuana and Psilocybin 🍄 have essentially reduced every mental health symptom I have into remission. I never thought this would be possible. I'd love to hear about your magic mushroom retreat.

Smokey Haven Grace

[Montana136 in reply to LifeIsThePitts]

I find this very interesting. I just actually watched a show on Netflix about psychedelics and mental health. I'm very interested in what you have said. I think Timothy Larry was on to something. Be well

[iloverugs in reply to LifeIsThePitts]

Those are some lovely dogs!

The psilocybin retreat was frankly amazing. Just to let you know, I’m not a spiritual person, and was very dubious about trying psychedelic drugs with hippies in Mexico. But it was a great experience, and the group was very supportive and therapeutic. It lasted five days with therapy throughout, and we did two “ceremonies” under the stars with music and bells.

I’ve done ketamine therapy before, but found psilocybin to be much more grounded and meaningful - no massive hallucinations, but very introspective and emotional. It frankly wasn’t fun to go through, but it definitely helped give me a different perspective on my life, my maladaptive behaviors, and how much my family and friends mean to me.

Here’s the organization: thebuenavida.net/

I was microdosing for the month of April, but stopped as I’m trying some medication for my issues with IBS.

Do you mind directing me to the forum on HU that’s focused on psychedelics for depression?

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to iloverugs]

It's an invitation only group and not a public forum on HU. I stumbled into it March '22 when looking for online support groups. I don't know how they recruit their members cuz I honestly don't know how I got here in the first place 🤦🤷🤭🙃I wasn't a member of HU or even knew what It was

[iloverugs in reply to LifeIsThePitts]

Well, if they’re open for other members, I’d be interested in joining. I’d appreciate it if you kept me in mind if you ever find out.

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to iloverugs]

I'll ask the administration about it

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to iloverugs]

I forgot to say... grace's Nick name is rugger dugger...so rugs is a great name

[iloverugs in reply to LifeIsThePitts]

Haha, my dog’s real name was actually Ruggur! Rugs was his nickname.

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to iloverugs]

OMG That's hilarious 😂