Update on old, alone, sick and afraid

[blueslite]

I went to the ER on Sunday April 2 and they admitted me. I got the best care ever and they sent me home yesterday. I had some type of pneumonia that was causing the cough. 24 hour antibiotic IV at first then every few hours every day up to and including Wednesday. I need to make followup appointments and am taking antibiotics for the next 30 days. One good thing I found out was that my heart is in great shape. I'm always concerned about my heart. They had done all kinds of tests on me and one was an ultrasound of my heart. The doctor I saw yesterday told me my heart was very strong, all the valves are working great and that my heart is in excellent condition. So happy to hear that! And he also told me that I'm fine and I could go home. YAY! I feel good right now and slept last night for a full 8 hours, first time since January I think. At the hospital they were always waking me up for something. LOL But I napped a lot while I was there. hahahaha

I'd like to thank everyone and anyone I might have missed on my other post for replying to me. It meant a lot to get all your thoughts, advice and love. It really did. ❤️ Being alone (offline) is not good but knowing there's a place where friends care is the next best thing and so much appreciated. Again, thank you all so much! ❤️❤️❤️

[Starrlight]

I’m so happy for you Blueslite! That’s huge. You are well. ☺️

❤️ ⭐️

[blueslite in reply to Starrlight]

Thank you Starrlight! I'm getting there. But I have 2 phone calls to make - I had a couple of voicemails this morning and I don't remember what they were, I think one is the hospital to make an appointment, not sure, but now I have phone anxiety. . What's wrong with me? I saved the voicemails of course, one was difficult to hear - I have a crappy Jitterbug phone - and I'm sitting here procrastinating about calling. I thought the best time to call back would be after lunch but now it's already 2:30pm and here I sit with some kind of anxiety that's just ridiculous and very annoying. I just create problems for myself. tsk.

[Starrlight in reply to blueslite]

I too get phone anxiety from time to time and it’s really frustrating. I just try to get the calls over with. Nothing is wrong with you at all. It’s just anxiety. I have to go out at 4 to run errands and really not looking forward to it but I’m going to try to find a way to make it better as I realize that the way I think about it has a consequence of positive or negative.

[blueslite in reply to Starrlight]

Thanks! I'm trying. I really need to make the 2 calls. And I'm already thinking of calling tomorrow but I just realized that's Saturday and I'd have to wait until Monday. I keep telling myself it's just anxiety. I'm just so aggravated with myself now. Good luck with going out. I know that one too and have it right now as well. I need to run out to a store only a few blocks away. There won't be much traffic at all in 3 hours and it shouldn't be a problem but for me it is. I hope you get out there! I'm sure you can do it!

[Starrlight in reply to blueslite]

Maybe don’t think about it anymore until you see it on your calendar and enjoy your weekend. I will try to enjoy mine as well, gotta go talk to you later. ☺️ Thanks for your encouragement.

[blueslite in reply to Starrlight]

yw! I'm still just sitting here, not going anywhere and didn't make the calls. And apparently I got another one while it was charging in another room. I didn't hear it ring. I guess I'll be calling them all on Monday, I have no choice now. I don't understand what you mean about a calendar. I hope your weekend is a good one. Have fun whatever you do.

[Starrlight in reply to blueslite]

Hi I’m back from my errands. I keep overthinking. How are you doing now?

[blueslite in reply to Starrlight]

ha! I just answered you in my last reply, I hadn't seen this reply from you. Glad you got your errands done. Good for you! Overthinking - yes, I need to stop thinking and just make the calls when Monday comes. I'm only annoying myself the longer I procrastinate. You might think I was literally glued to my chair and can't get up to do anything. Just getting disappointed in myself the more I put things off.

[Starrlight in reply to blueslite]

You’ll get it done, right? Please don’t be hard on yourself. You deserve compassion.

[blueslite in reply to Starrlight]

I've always been kind of hard on myself but it was probably okay in years past when my life was normal and I didn't have anxiety and life was good. I loved a challenge and worked hard at everything, it was fun. These days maybe not so okay. I suppose it's just because I know how I am, I make excuses for not doing things and I procrastinate about everything. I just keep thinking that I must be so lazy because I can't think of any other reason why I would just sit here and do nothing. Thanks Starrlight, you do help to make me feel better. And yes, I will get it done, I have no choice. Maybe that's the only way I can make myself do anything is wait until I have no choice. tsk.

[Starrlight in reply to blueslite]

Its good that you know yourself. I guess we all have our own ways. For me I have to do things early and I feel relief when I get it done. I know people who feel more comfortable to wait until it’s last minute. Whatever works. ☺️

[blueslite in reply to Starrlight]

That's true. That might be what it is with me. I wasn't always like that and it's very appealing to me to get things done sooner rather than later. But these days and for a long time now I never do.

[Starrlight in reply to blueslite]

I’m cheering you on! 😊

[blueslite in reply to Starrlight]

Thank you Starrlight. :)❤️

[Celtic27]

I'm glad to hear your on the mend it's amazing how resilient you can be I've not came across you on here before I hope you continue to stay well God bless you 🙏

[blueslite in reply to Celtic27]

Thank you! I don't comment very often that's probably why you haven't seen me. I think I've seen posts by you before but my memory isn't very good so I don't really remember. Although, your username sounds familiar, it would have gotten my attention - I'm Irish. LOL Grandparents came here in the early 1900s from Ireland. And God bless you as well. 🙏 Thank you for that.

[Celtic27 in reply to blueslite]

Your welcome my grandparents came from Ireland also I loved hearing there stories from the Mills they worked in take care all the best

[blueslite in reply to Celtic27]

Thank you!

[Agora1]

blueslite, you are a sweetheart. I'm so happy that you went to the hospital and got the

care you needed. You got a bonus in finding out that your heart is in great shape.

Now it's about you taking care and getting the rest you need while recovering. We are

always here for you if you need a kind word or support. Get well soon xx

[blueslite in reply to Agora1]

Thank you Agora! ❤️ I went to my preferred hospital, the ones closer to me are horrible, I've been there before. Ambulances won't take me where I want to go so my niece took me to the one I like. Of course she berated me for it. But my stay was great, they treated me like a queen. I almost didn't want to come home. Almost. LOL I'm getting plenty of rest and so happy to be home. But now I'm dealing with some anxieties and that's annoying to me. And yes, it's great to come here and get the support from my friends and people who really care and understand. Thanks so much! ❤️😀

[SayNOtoPanic]

OMG this made me shed some tears. Prayers for your healing! Grateful to hear a positive! May you continue to recover and restore your health. Pneumonia is no joke and can leave the lingering cough mess for a while after. Big hugs.

[blueslite in reply to SayNOtoPanic]

Thank you so much for the prayers, they are truly appreciated! I feel good and glad to be home but it was so nice at the hospital. LOL I had been having coughing fits every day for about 2 months. I thought it was a kind of cough I had at the beginning of last year but I got rid of that pretty quick with an herbal cough syrup that I got right away. This time I had to wait almost 2 weeks for the order to come in so I just thought it would take longer to work. Um...I was wrong. Thank you and big hugs back atcha.

[SayNOtoPanic in reply to blueslite]

You’re most welcome! Glad you’re better and it was a positive experience. Stock up on cough drops and honey and lemons to help you as the cough slowly leaves. 🙏🏻👍🏻

[blueslite in reply to SayNOtoPanic]

The cough is totally gone. It was gone the day I came home. Good antibiotics. LOL Prayers - ❤️ thank you!

[misslillie]

Your's seems the mirror image of my life. Often I lack follow through and many times I just can't find my starter switch. Over many years and episodes I have accumulated a number of diagnosis. They are frustrating and inconvenient and down right disruptive to my life. I have been absolutely miserable for long stretches of time. I have suffered as I know you have. In spite of all that, when I compare our circumstances, I think we will get by; we will survive. We will find something in each day to make life worth living. Even if on some days it is only gratitude that is not any worse. I see you and I know it is true that you are stronger than you know. You have found friends here. Kindred spirits fresh from the fight. Be kind to your self. I for one know that you are doing the best that you can.

[Starrlight in reply to misslillie]

Misslillie, you are so awesome. Thank you you are so right. We do find things in the day that make life worth it to live. Yes I know you are doing your best too… and we ARE so strong. I’m so glad you are here.

[blueslite in reply to misslillie]

I'm sorry I never replied - I went back into the hospital very sick, coughing up blood not even 2 days after I came home and was writing on here. I'll post another update. Anyway, I have too many fears, anxieties. The older I get the more there seems to be afraid of. And being almost totally alone only makes it worse. Thank you for your reply. Kindred spirits....yes, there are many of us.

[Hope4me1]

We are all doing the best that we can. We need to celebrate little triumphs. All of you are very supportive to each other and so compassionate.

I seem to be in a little slump lately with aches and pains and headaches. My resilience is lacking and it seems like it’s hard to want to do anything. Depression and my anxiety gets troublesome and I go to my quiet spaces and try to heal. I have learned so much here and a lot of you have so many wise words. Getting older is hard sometimes. I am hoping for some good days again soon. Meanwhile I’ll keep up with meditation, journaling, gentle music and sunshine.

I’m glad you are feeling better, blueslite. I wish you wellness and ease.💕🕊️

[blueslite in reply to Hope4me1]

Thank you Hope. I'm sorry you have so many troubles. But it's what draws us all together here with, yes, the support and compassion you mentioned. Getting older, for me, seems quite difficult. I don't think I ever really wanted to grow up. But here I am, an old person with an old person's problems and more. I had to go back to the hospital, I was very sick, have been in the hospital from April 8 until today. I'll post an update. I wish you well too, and peace and rest from your troubles. ❤️

[Hope4me1 in reply to blueslite]

Thank you for your reply, Blueslite. I am facing a little medical challenge right now as well. I hope you will be able to be well enough to return home soon from your hospital stay. But meanwhile I wish you great healing and peace for your soul.💕🕊️

[blueslite in reply to Hope4me1]

yw! Thanks, I came home yesterday. Just feeling very despondent. I hope you meet your challenge and conquer it.

[designguy]

Awesomely good news for you, enjoy the hell out of it!

[blueslite in reply to designguy]

Thank you! Unfortunately it was short-lived; I was back in the hospital extremely sick at about 5am on April 8. I came home today, the 20th.

[designguy in reply to blueslite]

Sorry to hear, I hope you are doing better today and making an effort to be kind and compassionate with yourself and treat yourself the way you would treat a friend in your situation. I know a lot of us were never taught or parented self-love and compassion and self-acceptance and were even shamed or punished for trying to do it as kids, I know I was so it's something we have to learn and practice for ourselves and we are never too old to learn new things.

[blueslite in reply to designguy]

Thanks. For the most part I spoiled myself. Now that the reality of old age is here I can't seem to deal with it. I have too many problems. How much can a person take before they just give up and....what? Fall down? There are no options, if you can't get help what do you do? I have problems other than my health and it's just too overwhelming.

[designguy in reply to blueslite]

Here is a link to something you might find helpful:

innerbondinghub.com/op/your...

[blueslite in reply to designguy]

Thanks. I'll look at it but I see it's an e-book which I know nothing about and I don't download anything. My PC is already on shaky ground, downloads in the past have caused me problems. I'm not very tech oriented, I have trouble navigating this site.

[Teaching]

I'm so happy you are doing great! Glad you are back.

[blueslite in reply to Teaching]

Thank you! It's too bad things took a turn for the worse though. I'll post about it.

[Weatherwoman]

So, just got your update! So happy to hear that you are doing better & got "squared away" at the hospital. Great that your heart is in good shape. Yaaaaa!

[blueslite in reply to Weatherwoman]

Thanks! But I was back in the hospital, thus my absence from here and no responses from me in the last 12 days. I'll make a post about it.

[Weatherwoman in reply to blueslite]

So sorry things got bad, again, for awhile. Hopefully, you will heal Soon. Things have gotten worse, for me, as well. It's a long story which I won't get into, but, I may have to vacate this house & find Affordable Housing which is Very hard. Am Very scared now! Pray for all of us. Thx.

[blueslite in reply to Weatherwoman]

Thanks WW. I'm sorry for your plight. I'm looking for affordable senior housing, filled out the application last year but they told me there's a 2 and a half to 3 year waiting list. Not sure if told you that before or not. I'm scared too but for a different reason. Keeping us all in my prayers. 🙏🙏

[Weatherwoman in reply to blueslite]

Keep the prayers going --Much Needed! Thx.

[blueslite in reply to Weatherwoman]

Will do. 🙏🙏

[Weatherwoman in reply to blueslite]

Thx. --called my lawyer today & he will call me with more info. re. situation with house. Don't want to go into any detail, but, keeps me very uneasy not knowing when I may have to move, and where!

[blueslite in reply to Weatherwoman]

yw! I hope the lawyer has something good to tell you. Not knowing those things is very nerve-racking I'm sure.

[Weatherwoman in reply to blueslite]

Yes, will keep you up to date!

[blueslite in reply to Weatherwoman]

Please do, I'll do my part and keep praying. 🙏🙏

[Raggedy-Ann]

Wonderful News!

[blueslite]

Thank you! Unpleasant update coming though, unfortunately.