Thank you so much for all your replies. They're really kind and helpful. I just have no energy to do anything. I couldn't leave the house in days, couldn't even buy food and meds. I tried to open a can of tuna but it's terrible, i feel nauseous, and im struggling between giving it to stray cats(i really hate wasting food especially when i paid for it) and forcing myself which is mostly impossible. And i can't see well. My eye is glitching and I'm really worried. Might be anxiety, might be something serious. Also my glasses frame is damaged and my glasses look like i have just been in a fight. Wondering whether to buy new glasses. And whether to use my old lens so it's cheaper and i don't have to adjust to a new dioptre and don't have to go through eye examination. I feel really bad because when i was really depressed i did an online shopping spree and i feel bad about the money i spent and that now i have to spend for more meaningful thing. I have a trauma around money. When i was little my family wasn't letting me buy anything, saying we have no money and now as an adult this bugs me. Still wondering whether to keep on with my old glasses, buy new frames or get examined and buy new glasses.
The second life. (Just vent cause im mad, ik what to do, i need advice on my depression and eyes).It's about my "friend"'s dog. She dumbed me on new year and now calls me begging me for help. She said her dog is acting weird and isn't eating and to ask my father who is a vet professor what to do. I know that my dad's a vet, not a sorcerer, so i asked her for context. I have been on his reception as a teen, i have translated his books, i have some experience even if not as a nurse but as a reception/call center. So i asked her what breed, gender, age the dog is. I asked for other symptoms. She said no. That really surprised me when i found out that's actually even worse. Doggo has constipation. I asked what do they feed it. She said chicken heads and legs. I was too stunned to speak 😬😰. I said it most probably has a bone stuck in its guts. She insisted i ask dad as if he's a mage. Dad said the same thing. I just felt awkward bothering him with this BS. I told her take it to the vet and run xray and blood tests. She called me mad and said her parents refused to take the dog to the vet "because it was a countryside dog, no clear breed, dirty". Vets don't care, they just want to help. I got even madder and she said she will give me her parents number. Now from one awkward call with my dad to even more awkward to hers. Genius. I hate how the dog is fighting for its life (because it's taken care of by idiots) and they refuse to take it to the vet out of their mentaliy. My archnemesis - balkan peasant mentallity. And im fighting for my own life, having social anxiety and now a dog's life is on me. And im not getting anything. Just nerves. Im doing it just out of Altruism...or people pleasing
Iam A Failure I aint Sh**
