I hate my life

I'd rather keep it to myself than share to people who doesn't even care. Today i had a fight with my project team i told them i am sick and going to the doctor for blood test she told me it's not my business i don't care i swear people here are disrespectful i just hate everyone here i can't even belong i can't have friends i don't go well with them 💔 i feel like i am the bad person everyday.

[Hb2003]

I care about you ❤️ I’m so sorry that happened 😞

[Hidden in reply to Hb2003]

Thank you hiba for your kind words ❤️ i am just sad i feel rejected from this community i can't cope well with them 💔

[Hb2003 in reply to Hidden]

You’re welcome ❤️ I understand why though and your feelings are valid people should care if your sick or need to take a mental health break . You should make a complaint you deserve better than this . Lots of hugs and support your not a bad person they are bad people you don’t deserve that

[Hidden in reply to Hb2003]

Thank you you are so kind

[Hb2003 in reply to Hidden]

Your welcome ☺️

[Agora1]

meme x I know the pain it causes to hear things like "I don't care" "it's always about you"

"you're so dramatic" etc. Sometimes it's not only friends but family that can be harsh.

Don't give them the satisfaction in hurting you emotionally. Everything comes full circle

and someday they may see what it was like. You've got this my friend xx

[Hidden in reply to Agora1]

I am just going from one cycle of abuse to another i can't have friends they are just horrible people

[Agora1 in reply to Hidden]

I hear you meme, it's because they don't understand and really don't care to.

When it's something that others can't see and that tend to go on and on, they

get tired in listening to us. It's nothing you did wrong. Make sure that you are

good to yourself and love yourself. No one will ever care about you like you do. xx

[laststand in reply to Hidden]

I'll be your friend.

[Hidden in reply to laststand]

I would love to be your friend too

[TangledUpIn in reply to Hidden]

You said a lot when you said you're going from one cycle of abuse to another. I can relate.

[laststand]

Screw those people. You take care of yourself and they can do what they want. What kinds of things do you like doing?

[Hidden in reply to laststand]

I like to dance, draw and just be happy but lately i am not feeling well

[laststand in reply to Hidden]

Show us some of your drawings! That would be cool.

[Hidden in reply to laststand]

I will one day ❤️

[Broken1971]

I get this. Trying to balance depression anxiety and a job/school is so hard...and mean people just make it worse. Don't feel you are a bad person. No one should tell you that and you shouldn't think it just for being disappointed/ mad at these people.

[Hidden in reply to Broken1971]

Unfortunately they never respect how i feel, they think that i am happy and doesn't care and have no problems simply because i never share with them 💔 i wasn't lucky in having real friends just. People who come and go

[Broken1971 in reply to Hidden]

Right. I'm the same way. I try to hide what is going on and no one sees the pain I am dealing with...and they probably wouldn't care even if they did. I hope you can find some friends or reconnect with old ones that will help you cope with everything. You always have support here.

[Hidden]

Hi meme, that sucks. Even if that project team did not care, she was not supposed to respond like that, that mean. Sorry meme, that you are having a hard time. I know that friendships comes from the heart and you will get your connection.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Yes, i always find myself sounded by people who doesn't look like me not physically but i never went along with anyone even though i grow up a people pleaser, wanted affection and love from people and couldn't have any

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Many of us can relate with that at some point, it hurts. It so difficult to connect but very pleasing at the same time, not talking about relationships but friendships as well. Not having that can make a person appreciate when it comes, so, I bet when you do find a connection, you will do better. Life sucks sometimes. Take care

[Dancer2020]

Hi meme. I totally relate. I thought my friends would be there for me but I've actually lost friends over my anxiety. That was such a surprise and disappointment to me. I had to hide that from most people. I found I could only talk about how I felt with my counselor. I think it's hard for people to understand unless they have experienced anxiety/depression. I'm thankful for this group because they understand and I know I'm not alone in this. Take care. I'm with you.

[Hidden in reply to Dancer2020]

Yes, for having real friends was always a challenge i would be friends with everyone in the class hoping they would like me too but after i am almost finishing my school i can't find anyone to call real friends

[Nonna60]

Hello meme. We are all here to support you and trust me, we understand. I'm so much older than you, and have been through it all. People can be so cruel. I can no longer consider working because I am completely burned out with it all. I have no idea why people cannot be kind, other than some may be suffering quietly themselves. I dunno. And, you belong here, with us! ❤️❤️❤️

[Hidden in reply to Nonna60]

Your kind words touched my broken heart thank you i really appreciate it ❤️

[Choctawgirl]

Just wondering. Can you change jobs? Being in a work environment like that is BS. It's useless to try and get them to care. I 🙏🙏🙏🙏 for your health and wellbeing!

[Hidden in reply to Choctawgirl]

Unfortunately i am in a senior year in nursing school i only have one month left to graduate that's why i am pushing myself to complete this long road

[Choctawgirl in reply to Hidden]

So it's your classmates being jerks? Ugh!

[Hidden in reply to Choctawgirl]

Yes, they are so aggressive i told her you are being aggressive with me she told me it's me accept it, just over dose of rudeness and hate from my classmate even though i am respecting every one of them

[Choctawgirl in reply to Hidden]

Omg! Is it possible to switch classes? Can you ignore them?

[Laykonyde]

Hi Meme,

Sorry to hear about your struggles.

Its a shame people can be very insensitive calling you drama queen.

I care about u, and im hsppy to listen to you.

I hope you find pwrfect peace your looking for.

Hugs!

[Hidden in reply to Laykonyde]

Thank you i. Really appreciate it ❤️

[Always-Neg]

I feel like that a lot to and my family says the same thing, I’m dramatic! Well in my head is is dramatic and battling with it in my head because no one cares. I think most people probably feel that way because they don’t really understand how horrible it feels to feel sad or even feel like everyone hates you. Because I don’t talk to anyone about how I feel, it helps me to write it in a notebook or journal. It can be pages long depending on how “dramatic” your feeling. Also, so I don’t repeat it to anyone, I’ll write about people that treat me like crap. You need to release your emotions somehow. Hope this helps!

[Anxiety-guy]

Hi, sorry it's been along time. I just came from church. I took communion without confession. So I am trying not to feel guilty. My anxiety took my career away from me about 12 years ago because my panic disorder grew to not sleeping for 2 weeks which led to paranoia and delusions. I always hate myself because I couldn't stand them even though I fought them very strongly for along while. So I can relate with you thinking your not worthy of friends. I feel so rejected I think God won't listen to me sometimes. But it's untrue. I am looking for a person to bounce off my unreal thoughts against. I would do this for you as well. Let me know.

[Hidden]

that is one of the WORST experiences, and I want you to know you are not alone. i refer to it as "gaslighting by tribe" and i can tell you that you are correct in your feelings. it can leave a person feeling devalued, destabilized, and disoriented. try, try, try to focus on yourself and nurture yourself- even if it means just breathing in for 8 beats, holding it for 4 beats, then pushing the air out for an entire 8 beats. It's hell, i know, and i also realize this advice is not a magic bullet. sometimes recovery is indeed the best revenge, though.

that really sucks, though. vent here. i'm not always on the site but i check in when i can. much love XO (screw them! you're okay, they're messed up GRRRR)

[Hidden]

i saw a bumper sticker once that read, "MEAN PEOPLE SUCK". screw those jerks, man. big hugs and good energy for you. sometimes i watch videos on youtube that feature kittens tumbling around on each other. it really changes my mental state. go color, listen to loud music (even if you need to plug into headphones, like if you live in an apartment) and dance your frustrations off. dancing is an excellent release. find the right music- you'll get there.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you i will put on loud music to dance on it i find it relaxing and enjoyable

[No1wthayla]

Hi, meme_1998. Your team leader should be more sensitive. And she shouldn't have said what she did. Talk to her supervisor or go to your Human Resources department. We have an ADA (Americans with Disabilities Association) that will work with your department/leader confidentially to find an accommodation (allowance) for you to get more time away from work due to ongoing health issues. A shorter request for time off, no need to explain "why" you are going to take a day, maybe an hour extra at lunch to grab a nap at your desk. I can get an "as-needed" form signed that can give me a year of accommodations for my issues. Or I can get a short-term note too. My physician has to complete this for me but she's a doll.

You also shouldn't have to specify why you need to leave for a medical test or doctor visit. A short "I need 2 hours to go to my doctor's appointment this afternoon. I will be leaving at 2" and they should accept that without explanation. Your health is only your business and you do not have to share details with your project leader.

I work in a job where we are considered adults and professionals. And we don't typically take leave unless it is something we really need to do. I have few friends at work because I don't like to socialize with my co-workers. They aren't "terrible" but when birthday announcements went out in September, my name was not part of that. My co-worker who's birthday is 10 days later than mine did get an email birthday announcements. I don't like being left out but I know that most of them only tolerate me because I'm (usually) good at my job. I do have my faults.

But my two best friends from college and I still talk. And we met in 1989 to 1993. I do have to add that I have some friends on HU. Without this community, I would be stuck in the fog and darkness I felt 2 years ago. This platform is a wonderful way to seek help from those who are going through the same thing. People who are your friends and do care for you, even if we have never met IRL.

Prayers, hugs, love and light!

[Lazy_dog_lover]

Please try to find someone who does care. A work team is probably not the best group to share non-work issues with. Wrong audience.

Keeping in inside will only make it worse and you are very much worth more than that.

Keep looking for a therapist who does small group work. It is amazing what the right sharing can do.

What other ways do you release frustrations? Exercise, art, gardening, cleaning, meditation, boxing, ....?

Exploding in your working environment risks your livelihood.

[Hidden in reply to Lazy_dog_lover]

Unfortunately i thought they are my friends we have been together for the last four years but when i knew how much they hate me i just got my heart broken

[Abcdefg1234567 in reply to Hidden]

I'm so sorry for your heartbreak. People can be so catty. I am curious--do you do well on exams and stuff? There is a definite possibility that they are jealous of your devotion or intelligence, especially in nursing school. Jealousy can lead people to treat others terribly, due to their own insecurities.

[Hidden in reply to Abcdefg1234567]

Yes, i get a+ on most of my results. But i thought they love me and care about me as i do, but instead i knew they talk badly behind my back like calling me a whore and attention seeking. Anyway human will always be human. And if someone hates you it appears in their words and actions

[Atlproctor]

GM. How are you?I am well.

meme_1998, do you have family?

Are you close to any of them?

Do you have other hobbies?

I know you said you like to dance and draw.

What kind of dancing?

Will you share some of your drawings with us?