I noticed that when I get really anxious because of my PTSD/Anxiety, that sometimes I have a hard time eating food. I was wondering if anyone else has had that happen as well?
I tend to get it more when I eat out since that's when I'm the most anxious, but I do get it at home as well but I'd say its more so when I'm eating out. And I always have to have my 6 to the wall, I can't have anyone on my 6 or I will not eat.
Yes, I can relate to this. If I have extreme anxiety or upset over something I cannot eat and I get dry heaves.
My PTSD was so out of control a few years ago I needed to sit close to the exits. I positioned my seat so I could get out fast. I hated sitting in a restaurant. I didn't like the crowds and I didn't want to sit for periods of time. I felt trapped.
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I've had PTSD and anxiety for a year now, and I got the same issue with crowds. I can't tolerate even going into a crowded store. I can't even walk down an aisle in a store if another person is in it. If it was clear before and someone gets on my 12 or on my 6, I have to get out there. I can't even walk though an aisle at normal speed, I just blast though it.
I did that too. I've been on treatment for many years now. I went through the running through the store bit. I would grab the stuff and get out as fast as possible. I made no eye contact with anyone.
I don't do that anymore but I do go to stores right when they open. Crowds are less and I can get in and out.
I understand what you are going through. Hopefully in time you will see things improve. Are you in therapy
I've been in and out of help. Been given up on 3 times, I'm afraid of going back to get help. I've been to the hospital 9 times now and the crisis center, both haven't helped.
I'm so sorry
This really breaks my heart.
We do have PTSD site here on HU. You may want to join that community.
I'm here if you want to chat.
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Thanks. I'll look into that.
Many of us are on both sites. Each one has so much to offer.
Don't let the system give up on you, push them. I know it's hard when we don't even know what we need. Getting better is so much work. It's very hard but you can make progress.
❤️
awwww sweet Checko sorry to hear this. Take it easy on yourself. Maybe try to do exposure therapy little bit at a time to slowly build tolerance and re wire ur mine. Don’t force it. Maybe restaurant once a week onky where u order the food first and pay then go sit and if weather allows sit outside. Feels a lot less suffocating. Meal hours after or before the rush of that meal time so less people also. And slowly build good experiences. It will start to reduce the ptsd. Big hugs.
I still go out everyday, and I have to go inside a store everyday because if I don't its going to be harder for me to stay in it.
I've been doing pt. down at the fire academy training center 3 times a week for 2 months now , and its been hard because of the PTSD but I was able to push through that extensive workout. Its not easy but I still try to stay in that fight.
you’re amazing! Keep it up!! That’s wonderful. All these positive opportunities will help u re wire and slap ur anxiety and ptsd.
Thanks, I appreciate, it. I think it does help me to rewire my mind, I think its the most effective thing so far. My instructors are great as well. A few weeks ago, we were outside, something set me off, I got into flight, fight or freeze, and I'm at the bottom of the steps of the burn tower, felt like I couldn't move, and we had to farmers carry 80 pounds up and down the steps I had an instructor give me that additional push I needed, and I made it up those steps twice with 40 pounds.
I failed the physical fitness test on Saturday, I'm still angry at myself for letting the PTSD/anxiety get to me,(I know I can't help it, but its still hard not to be angry at myself, I felt like I let my guys from the firehouse I use to be at down) but I still went to training last night, It was hard but I made it though.
I'm planning on knocking that test out of the park when I test again next Saturday.
💪🏻💪🏻
Last night, one of the things we had to do was drag a 150+ pound chain across the drill ground and I'm not that tall, so that chain is probably 20 or 30 times my body weight, I actually ended up falling backwards, I didn't go all the way down, I caught myself, got up, the instructor came over, gave me some words of advise, I pulled it across the finish line, and another instructor came over and he was pretty impressed. That surprised me a bit actually.
Going back tomorrow and I can't wait to see what they have us do.
You have heart and that’s going to slap ur mental health struggles straight in the face. 🙏🏻
Checko, I think we've talked before regarding the physical fitness test. You Can
and you Will knock that test out of the park on Saturday 
It's not about training physically but training your mind as well. I did things I never
thought were humanly possible for me. Don't worry about disappointing anyone.
Do it for you Checko and no one else. I'll be cheering you on Saturday. You've
Got This xx
Thanks, I really appreciate it.
I know I should do it for myself, but my guys mean the world to me, and ever since I left the firehouse I was at, they always seemed sad, but when they found out that I'm trying to come back, it was the happiest I've seen those guys in awhile.
I am doing it for myself, but its them that's also keeping me going. Early on in training, I had two low blood sugars one night and I had a talk with the LT. he was like "don't come back without a doctors note" and I was thinking after "I'm not even going to make selection because of my drivers license status, and I don't want to be a burden to my instructors so why don't I just pull out?"
The next day, I ran into my guys at the store I use to work at, and they were so happy and asked me how training was going, I told them what happened but after seeing how happy they were, I got that doctors note and came back the next day.
The LT. looked at me while I was standing in formation and he said "I thought I told you to come back with a doctors note" and I said "you did, its on your desk, one of the other instructors took it" he walked away. About 20 minutes later, he looked at me, smiled and gave me a nod"
It if wasn't for my guys right there, I more than likely would've not ended up going back to training.
You’re an inspiration. Thank you for sharing. It’s very uplifting to know that despite the mental health and the setbacks and the fear we can and do rise. Amen 🙏🏻
Thanks.
I've been trained not to give up, and that's not always easy. There are days where I get so angry at myself, because I do the things that most people cant/wont do, I find it easy, but the most easiest thing in the world I can't do, going into a store and walk into an aisle with other people in it. Its easy to get angry at stuff like that.
It can be hard to develop that mindset of "I'm not going to give up I'm not going to quit, I'm not going to accept defeat, I'm going to keep pushing forward and give it all I got." Even with that drilled into your brain, it can still be hard at time.
If you have that mindset and the right support you can go pretty far, even without that support, you can still make it. Its going to be hard, and might take longer, but you can still do it.
I relate with you so much. Can rise to the tough work and push with determination and yet a trip to the pharmacy and a slow line can send me into full fight or flight and running (sprint speed) out the darn pharmacy scared for my life. If you know you know. It’s awful.
Its the same for me and it is awful. I just have to blast through those store aisles. I can't go through self checkout, I have to go through a regular line, but I found that taking a cart with me and putting it on my 6 helps a little bit, it kinda acts like a barrier so people can't get too close.
Is anyone else worried about this?
Has anyone had experience tapering off Mirtazapine?
Has anyone had bad experiences with Busiprone?
Has anyone had anxiety/problems like this at night? 
Does anyone else battle these?
