trying to accept suffering

[Blossom07]

hey there,

I just wanted to share my story in order to look for some advice.

My grandma is actually dying. She’s in a coma, and we don’t know how much time is left to her, it could be hours, days or weeks…

I am pretty ok with this. She had a long and good life, and I think I am fine in letting her go.

By the way, the whole situation is causing me an enormous amount of anxiety and pain. I keep imagining the moment when the doctors will call us to tell about her death, and all the suffering that the news will immediately create. And this thought is paralyzing me: during these days I couldn’t do almost anything, despite my whole family kept telling me to try to move on, also because we know what her destiny is.

It’s just the thought of that very moment. I know that the pain will eventually go away, but I just can’t stand the idea of receiving the bad news. It seems like I can’t accept the pain- and it’s not something new to me, I’ve always tried to escape pain. But now that I can’t, I don’t know how to accept the whole situation.

[Dolphin14]

I'm sorry for what you are going through. This is a very painful and individual time.

Your emotions are yours and no one else can tell you how to feel or react.

Even when death is expected it is painful. You may have already begun your grieving process.

I wish your grandmother a comfortable passing. I'm glad she had a wonderful long life.

Be gentle with yourself. ❤️

🐬

[0308_11]

That’s a really tough situation and I’m sorry you are going through this. If you know she is passing try to think of her at that moment being at peace and relieved from her pain or sufferings.

[Dolphin14]

How are you doing?

[Blossom07 in reply to Dolphin14]

Hi, thank you for asking and thanks to everyone for caring.

My grandma died peacefully a few days ago. During her last days, I frequently told my mother about how I was feeling, and about my necessity to restart therapy again because of this strong amount of anxiety.

Since I live far from my family (I was there just for the whole situation), my parents told me to go home, because all this was becoming too much for me.

My mother told me on the phone about nana's passing. But it was ok, because at least distance made things go a bit better. She told me really gently, and I jut felt relieved.

Now I'm going to restart therapy as soon as possible, to improve myself in accepting these situations (so maybe next time I will also be able to be there with them).

Again, thanks to everyone! Your words were really precious to me.❤️

[Dolphin14 in reply to Blossom07]

Blossom07

I'm so sorry for your loss. Knowing your grandmother passed peacefully is settling.

It's great you got the conversation started with your mom. Sometimes it's not easy to speak up for our own needs. Be proud that you had the strength to do this

Sounds like you are on the right track, taking a pro active stand to get back into therapy.

Give yourself time and be gentle with yourself.

❤️🐬

[kenster1 in reply to Blossom07]

hi Blossom sorry for your loss hopefully the many great memories you have and the support of family and friends helps you in these difficult times. I`m one of the few who`s never had a grandparent in my life that I know sort of missed having that growing up. god bless and take care.