Someone i know from since all my trauma has started, like 2-3 is acting really weird. It's driving me miserable

[Against_the_current]

This person has been supporting me since August 2020 when it all started but now he's worrying me, always saying we're not meeting irl anyway and he might move on and it's terrible. This person started all my need for attention online. Before that i was too shy but now i compulsively need attention and reassurance online. Dissapeared. Appeared. Dissapeared. Appeared. And when appear it's always there but end every damn sentence with "but it's not happening irl anyway". It drive me crazy. I can't just go there. I can't go to a better country than mine and what about worse. And If he moves on, i will get manic hate for his region and i might lose my mindIt's 3:31 am and i'm crying. There's no single stable line in my life. I can't even breathe. I'm dizzy. Docs aren't helping. I can't get hospitalized without it ruining my life. I think my allergy is acting out again too but If it's physical i can fix it. I try so hard, go to therapy, go to university, do sports, socializing but it all failled down. I'm broken since 2 years. It will become 3. I went through doctors, i didn't stop searching for help. I was getting better but now i don't have energy to do sports or study, socializing and therapy drive me crazy. It falls down at 3am. And now him. What if he gets married and says he can't talk with me any more. I will lose the Last drop of sanity left in my sick brain

[Nothingnoted]

im here for you. I'm so sorry you're struggling kiddo. I know it's really hard and you deserve to be happy and at peace. Sending you warming healing vibes, love Gigi

kawaii. cute in Japanese

[1962faithorn in reply to Nothingnoted]

My prayers are with you

[Against_the_current in reply to 1962faithorn]

Thank you 🙏

[Against_the_current in reply to Nothingnoted]

Thanks. I love kawaii stuff. In korean it's aegyo i think ^^

[Nothingnoted]

You are welcome. Thank you. I know a couple of phrases in Korean but I wish I knew more I like that you provided me with thank you and you are constantly in my prayers love, Gigi

[Against_the_current in reply to Nothingnoted]

Saranghae ^^

[Nothingnoted in reply to Against_the_current]

Can you tell me what that means please? Thank you

[Against_the_current in reply to Nothingnoted]

It's just the cute way korens say love

[Nothingnoted in reply to Against_the_current]

Thank you or Domo in Japanese🙇‍♀️

[Nothingnoted]

sending you a friendship hug

hugs

[Nothingnoted]

I just looked up if Bulgaria has a suicide hotline or mental health hotline and it's called b r o s global I called the United States Suicide Hotline the other day to talk to someone during my lunch hour and it helped a lot I've called them several times I hope you can do that that'll make you feel better I wish I could do more I just wish you were feeling better I know how hard that is and we're here for you

[Against_the_current in reply to Nothingnoted]

I'm litterary suicidal rn and nobody to call. Bulgarian hot lines say im wasting their time. There's no hotline for my problems. They say im wasting their time and others need it more

[Nothingnoted]

Praying for you

[Nothingnoted]

im so sorry they are like that. I'm just wondering is there a way that you call our Hotline in the United States I can give you the number I'm not sure if you call them it's toll free number is there any way you can get away from that environment you have a sister right you guys know anybody or do you have friends there that can help you I will give you the number to the hotline I hope you can get help from them in the United States

[Nothingnoted]

1 800 273 8255 Us Hotline Number