does it cause you physical pain to think of the people who are no longer a part of your life?I get this horrible tightness in my chest when I think about how happy I used to be and how surrounded by friends I was. I'd give anything to go back and relive those moments.
what kills me the most is how otherson't feel the same way. They do get sad but inevitably they move on with their life. I basically just fall apart, sometimes I end up in the hospital. I've been laughed at and told to grow up by just about everybody, but that doesn't make it any easier to let go of what I had.
the best years of my life can't be behind me already can they? Will I ever meet people who can make me feel the same way again?
I should focused on my future but here I am worried about being lonely.
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I appreciate it and I do understand the concept, not really sure where to meet new people. Since I don't have any friends I'd have to go somewhere alone and just strike up a conversation, sounds terrifying
Hey frightenedturtleI totally get you. I struggle with my friends and thinking about those I used to see and how i don’t anymore. They have their new lives and sometimes I feel abandoned and dwell on this. But that’s my social anxiety telling me that - telling me it’s because I’m unworthy, that I don’t deserve them. it’s more that change happens - it’s the only thing that’s constant. The only thing you can control is yourself and your thoughts - everything else is a consequence of those thoughts.
If you struggle with meeting new people just start off slow - read a book in crowded cafes until you get used to it. Then say hi to a stranger. Then make conversation with a stranger. Then join a club. Slow and steady.
I totally understand. I don't know how to let go of people or my past. I used to have many "friends" now I have only a couple but these couple of friends are more true of friends than the 50 in the past. But it hurts they won't talk to me. I too have been told to grow up and stop acting like a baby and I'm in my 40s. I try to ignore it but it's not easy. Focus on all your doing to take care of you. Here is a quote I have on my quote board I made...."satisfy your soul. Not the society" I have many quotes written down but that's one. Also, " talk to yourself like you're talking to someone you love"
It could be that you are a HSP, highly sensitive person and feel things more deeply than others. I think it is more common in males than society realizes and it may be worth your checking out if you haven't already.
I'm a frightened turtle as well and I struggle with the same thing as a result of abandonment trauma as child, and later in adulthood as well... your profile came up when I searched "find someone local," it says we are within 40km do you live in Maine? Willing to talk if you might find that helpful.
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