Should I stay on spravato? (Ketamine)

[Joshgw]

Don't know what to do, I want to stay on ketamine but I can't stand the sleep deprivation and insomnia. I was up for 4 days last week. I'm afraid ketamine has fucked up my brain chemistry for good. I've tried trazodone, benadryl, vistaril, melatonin, valerian. Nothing works. I've had 6 sessions. My last session was 4 days ago. My heart is still racing, my mind going a million miles a minute. I can still feel it coursing through my veins. My chest is tight. I've done ECT, TMS, been on 20 meds. I really wanted it to work. I have had periods of relief, but otherwise the emotional/depressive pain and suicidal ideation has been unbearable. I even called the suicide hotline. That's why I started it. But I go to bed at 10pm and wake up at 12.30 am and can't go back to sleep. This has gone on for 3 weeks. If I go off, the pain and ideation will most certainly come back, but I can't function or concentrate. I can't get anything done at work. I have a wife and 12 year old son, but I'm at the end of my rope, threads really. My marriage is in shambles b/c of my depression, I get no support there. I really want to continue but I'm so exhausted I can't think straight or function, but what do I do about the pain and suicidal ideation? I hate the way it makes me feel. I feel like I never actually recover from a session and they just build and compound on each other.

Has anyone else have had similar experiences?

Josh

[Starrlight]

It sounds like it’s really not agreeing with you. Sorry I’m not familiar with the med. Best to you.

[b1b1b1]

It may help if you admit yourself to a psychiatric unit. There you would get intensive psychotherapy and also different medicines. I went through a very difficult period immediately after my husband died and did go to a psychiatric unit. I was taking Paxil at the time, but another medicine called olanzapine was added. It is an anti-psychotic, but is used off label for depression. I took it for several months and then gradually stopped, but it helped me a lot. I am in the US, and here there are a number of anti psychotics that are used off label to treat depression that does not respond to more standard treatments. If you do admit yourself, go to a very good hospital, as there can be differences among hospitals (again, at least in the US). I think this type of medication may help you a lot and I would strongly consider a brief hospitalization and a stronger medication.

You are suffering so much and you deserve help. xx

[Joshgw in reply to b1b1b1]

Thank you for responding. I've already been hospitalized recently. I got no therapy and they didn't even try to medicate me. The offered me ECT or just sent me home. I did the ECT which gave me severe migraines 24/7, even on days w/o treatment. And they didn't even take me seriously at first. I was there for 49 days b/c they took me off the meds I was on beforehand and then never put them back. After 7 sessions of ECT (half of a normal course) they sent me home the next day. I saw a psychiatrist maybe 5mins a day. And this was at Columbia Presbyterian in white Plains, supposedly the best in the country. Now I have a great therapist (2x/week) and psychiatrist once/wk. There's nothing the hospital can do that I do already do and I want to keep the Dr.s I have been on seroquel and Zyprexa already.

[b1b1b1 in reply to Joshgw]

OK. I was at Columbia Presbyterian Medical Center in Manhattan. My experience was completely different from yours. I am sorry it did not work out for you. I lived not far from the White Plains branch of Col. Presbyterian and am disappointed to hear they did not live up to their reputation. xx

[Dell12345]

Hi Josh, sorry to hear you are going through this. It's does sounds like you need to let your doctor's know that the medication is having this side effect and see what they say. There may be a better option, or a reduced dose that would help but not give you the side effects.

[Joshgw in reply to Dell12345]

Thanks. I'm seeing him today

[Ryanlion]

have you tried 'Natural Vitality Calm'. Its a magnesium drink mix to help anxiety & sleep. I take it because i am on Venlafaxine and cannot sleep on them either.

[Joshgw in reply to Ryanlion]

Thanks, I'll look into it. I already take magnesium.

[Joshgw in reply to Joshgw]

My problem isn't falling asleep, it's staying asleep

[bethelbee]

As b1b1 stated it may be a good idea to admit yourself to a psych hospital. They can monitor you and hopefully get you stabilized on something, whether it's meds or another form of treatment. Looks like you've tried several different treatments. I was fortunate to have TMS work for me. If you go inpatient, perhaps you can work on your relationship with your wife. If you go to therapy, does she participate at all? Sorry you're having a rough time. Hope things improve for you!

[Joshgw in reply to bethelbee]

I was recently hospitalized. I got no therapy saw a psychiatrist barely 5mins a day. They didn't even try to medicate me, and this was at Columbia Presbyterian in white Plains, NY, supposedly the best in the country. TMS did work for a while, then stopped. I was actually getting two doors a session and Mr Dr. Extended the number of sessions from 36 to 51. But I'd be willing to try again.

[bethelbee in reply to Joshgw]

Sorry you had a bad hospital experience. Doesn't sound like they tried to do much of anything. Maybe trying TMS again will help?? Each of my rounds lasted about 6 months. If it weren't for my last round I would probably be in a deep hole now due to many health issues I've been having. Obviously everyone responds differently. Hope it all works out for you!! Keep me posted..

[Joshgw in reply to bethelbee]

I would like to try TMS again. It did help me.

[bethelbee in reply to Joshgw]

I hope it helps again!

[wiz145]

I agree with b1b1b1. ECT did not work for me and stole a lot of my memories, so I am not a big fan of ECT

[bethelbee in reply to wiz145]

Happened to a friend of mine as well. That's why I would never do ECT.

[Joshgw in reply to bethelbee]

ECT did nothing for me, but it didn't effect my memory either

[Marysblue]

Thank you for letting me know about the side effect. I have worsened insomnia from ssri and couldn't take them. I had no idea ketamine could do this. I hope you get over the side effects soon. Have you tried Lunesta for insomnia?