Concerned about this "numbness" of feelings

Nothing excites me anymore. No hobbies. just laying in bed on my off day crying and realizing I have nobody in my life who cares about me or genuinely cares about me enough to make an effort to encourage me out the house, I'm so lonely and I hate it here. People IRL have only shown me how selfish people can be. Thoughts of my ex telling me no one loves me like he does are really haunting me like he has even recognized that being together no one ever called or texted me. My mom ignored my calls in front of him. I'm starting to think I'm not open enough and I have a wall but I don't even know how to start being more receptive and open when I'm so sad and so numb. I miss my dad. I miss him being here and knowing the right things to say to comfort me. I can never make it past small talk with others and I hate it.

[hypercat54]

Hi I am not surprised you are feeling so bad as you haven't long broken it off with your bf. Even after the way he treated you it's still a massive change and you will miss being in a relationship. Also narcissists are very good at love bombing you and making you feel very important to them. This is done to emotionally bind you to them even more.

When you have shown you have forgiven the narc then they will revert back to their true nature. Rinse and repeat.

Whether you realise it or not you have learned a harsh life lesson here and know what type of relationship to avoid in the future. You know you can love so have hope one day a man worthy of you will come along. I am sure one will.

[Chase888]

I agree with Hypercat cos in the past when I had relationships, not all but a couple of them said that and I had never spoken about any of my exes.

I had a male friend for over 20years like brother and sister and he told me that some men don't like it if their girlfriend has had men who were good cos they want someone they can keep under their control.

Hope we can look forward to the future, the end of lockdown and be able to visit places where we feel comfortable.