I just want to stop the pain

I wish I could make everyone understand how I feel right now. I've been having thoughts of killing myself every day for awhile now. I don't want to go to the hospital, but I also don't feel safe with my own mind. I am really scared and don't know what to do? I am so depressed. I just want to stop the pain. I am NOT going to kill myself, but what in the hell do you do when you're having those thoughts? All I know to do is cry and pray.

[Hb2003]

aww I’m so sorry 😞 lots of hugs and support I went to the counselor to get help with those thoughts also chatted with my therapist as well

[Hidden in reply to Hb2003]

Hiba, Lots of hugs and support right back at you. Thank you for being so lovely. I am in deep need of therapy. It's just hard to get in with a therapist where I'm at. It shouldn't be this difficult for anyone.

[Hb2003 in reply to Hidden]

Your welcome 🙏 ❤️

[EndUser13]

I've been in that suicidal ideation mindset, too many times. When you're feeling this down, sometimes the best-intentioned advice can seem pithy or out of touch. You might still find something helpful, perhaps if you take it all with a grain of salt and an understanding that it's not dismissing the pain you feel.

Something I've found helpful is to name off about 5 things each day I am appreciative of, I think gratitude is one of the keys to happiness. Try focusing on what IS going right... or maybe consider what you (or those close to you) would miss out on if you weren't here?

Hang in there, deal with things one at a time so you don't get overwhelmed, and know that while life will have plenty of negative things in it, it'll have some really nice things too.

[Hidden in reply to EndUser13]

That is a beautiful reply. Thank you. I will do my best. ❤️

[Hidden in reply to EndUser13]

Suicidal ideation is the worst. If you don't mind me asking... what would you say help stop yours?

[EndUser13 in reply to Hidden]

A guess a lot of little things... understanding that if I were to in fact end my life (and I just wanted to stop the suffering) I would miss out on the good things life had to offer. Appreciate the positive things in life while learning to give myself some credit for what I did do. Hanging on just because I didn't want to end it and finding that sometimes tomorrow can offer some great things. Really just appreciating the little things and making a bigger deal out of them and putting down the negative things helped a lot. It can be difficult but you have to be willing to try to offer yourself some comfort. Not every day is going to be a big win, but there will be things you'll be glad you were around to see, especially when you are actively looking for silver linings.

[Hidden in reply to EndUser13]

Thanks for your wisdom! I needed to hear just that. ❤️

[Hidden in reply to EndUser13]

I do keep a gratitude journal! I also list my accomplishments of the day, but I noticed on days I was more depressed I wouldn't write in it.

[EndUser13 in reply to Hidden]

That's a great idea! Also, it's fair... when you feel like crap it's hard to pick out the nice things and far too easy to give power to the negative ones.

[CurveyArcher]

Hiba I’m so sorry for the way you are feeling, I too was like you finally I broke down and spoke to my husband. We got in touch with my GP who suggested I contact Lifeline for counselling, they really are a lifeline and had to use their services twice before I was able to help myself when I noticed things going downhill. Please contact someone, talk to your GP, they will help.

Be kind to yourself and don’t give up, your life is so precious to someone. Enduser is totally right. ❤️

[Hidden]

I can't add any more than what's been said above so well. Are you in mental or physical pain? Are you in the UK is that why you can't see a therapist? Because if you were in the USA you should be able to go to an emergency room or urgent Care and tell them you're having suicidal thoughts you get help right away.

[mauv]

I understand how deep your emotional pain is. I have suffered with depression most of my life. It is a disease just like anxiety that we didn’t cause, can’t control and can’t fix, We need a therapist trained in our disease, medicine to restore the chemicals depleted from our brains, a good support group like this and family and friends that don’t judge you for having a mental disease. Reach out and ask for help. Don’t suffer on your own. We are here to help each other

[Daveacr1959]

Cry and pray and go for a long walk. Try some you tube aerobics? Try some excercising? It changes the chemicals in your brain. Please see a dr if you don’t get better. Your loved .

[Starrlight]

❤️