Depression and Anxiety

[Iris72]

Hi this is my first time being on here. I've been diagnose with these both from my therapist. I started therapy in September, and what I was going through then she has helped. But since my grandpa died, relationship issues, family issues, and job issues started happening I become depressed again and my anxiety is so bad again. I just want to be happy its just so hard. Distracting myself is not working anymore. Does anyone have anything that could help me get better?

[Dolphin14]

Welcome to the group. You will find the community very supportive.

My condolences on the loss of your grandfather. Maybe you are still grieving? Was he a bit support for you? Or your comfort person?

For me therapy was key. I learned was to cope with my anxiety but it took me awhile.

I think you will find talking with others that understand what you are going through will help you quite a bit.

🐬

[Iris72 in reply to Dolphin14]

In the few months before he past he was. He passed from cancer. He was more of my comfort person he helped me with my toxic past relationship. Would it still be considered grieving if I am not thinking about him. I am thinking bout the other stuff? Because yes I think bout my grandpa and miss him but hes in a better place and thank you for responding!

[Dolphin14 in reply to Iris72]

Grieving doesn't have a time line. You may be missing his comfort as you deal with the others. It's harder to deal with difficult people when you don't have your support person that brings you peace.

My sister passed from cancer a few years ago. She is free from her pain now but she's not with me in body anymore. Some days I feel like I need her I do feel her and I talk to her when I'm struggling. She always had a way of lifting me.

[Iris72 in reply to Dolphin14]

So because I am grieving its making everything worse? and I am sorry to hear bout your sister. I havent tried talking to him even though sometimes i feel him next to me calling me Sweetheart.

[Dolphin14 in reply to Iris72]

Just my thought and what I've learned in therapy.... if you lose your comfort person that supported you and lifted you, it's sometimes harder to deal with the negativity.

These people were always negative but maybe it's more painful to you because he is not there. I always felt as long as my sister was around treating me well I could deal better with the people that hurt me. I knew I had someone in my corner.

[Iris72 in reply to Dolphin14]

Thank you this has actually helped alot. My head finally feels clear for once again. Do you know if are some ways to help with my grieving?

[Dolphin14 in reply to Iris72]

I'm glad it's been helpful We do have a bereavement group here also that may help you

I think you just have to let it flow. It's an up and down type of healing process. Don't hide it just feel it.

When the others hurt you try and think what would grandpa do or say. My sister used to tell me to hold my head up high and know that I'm a good person. ❤️

I found comfort in looking at pictures. I would just let me tears out. I have some things of hers that keep me physically connected but my heart relies on the good memories.

Talking helps I think. Speaking with others that recognize the depth of grief.

Do you have a therapist to help you work on the anxiety and depression?

[Iris72 in reply to Dolphin14]

Yes I do. I just didnt think I could be still grieving. We were trying to figure out why everything was getting bad again. But now it makes more sense I am gonna talk to her about it on Wednesday.

[Dolphin14 in reply to Iris72]

Wonderful I hope this goes well. Def go on to the bereavement site. You will meet lots of people that have similar issues after losing someone.

❤️❤️

[Nothingnoted]

Hi Iris, Im so sorry for the loss of your grandpa. I'm so glad you're here this is a great supportive group of friends. I lost my mom about 20 years ago and one person told me when my mom passed away that even though they're not in the physical presence with you anymore they're even closer than they were before and knowing that your grandpa is probably your guardian angel. I know that your grandpa is smiling at you saying that he has such a wonderful granddaughter and he is so proud of you and he will always be with you.

[Iris72 in reply to Nothingnoted]

Thank you! This really helped ❤️

[LilyAnnepuppy]

Welcome to this group. I deal with my Anxiety and Depression using this site. My therapist who I see once a week. My psychiatrist who found the correct medications. My support group of friends in a 12-Step program. Prayer. And meditation.

This is a good forum for my mental well being. There are a lot of good people here who can support you.

I lost my daughter two years ago. But I’ll meet you on the Bereavement site to talk about grief. It certainly played around with my anxiety and depression. I’m glad you joined both.

[Stippler]

First of all, I am sorry to hear of your loss. Welcome to the group. I don't know if this would be helpful, but for me, I often treat myself harshly for not feeling good and not "having a good attitude." What I try to keep in mind is I cannot be happy all the time, especially while grieving a loss such as this. For me, I seem to get through the hard times better if I give myself permission to not be happy. This allows me to feel my real feelings early on rather than ignoring them to the point they get worse, because when I bury my real feelings instead of feeling them, I get depressed more. For me, when I allow myself to feel my sadness or anger, they go away sooner than when I ignore them or fight them. But I usually struggle with remembering to stick with this strategy. Anyway, I just wanted to share my own experience, in hopes that you benefit. Whatever you do, please go easy on yourself through this tough time. Wishing you the best. 🙏🙏🙏

[LilyAnnepuppy]

I had just finished up TMS treatments when my daughter died. Google TMS. I’m not suggesting it, im just pointing to a description of what I went through.

Anyway, the blow of the loss played havoc with my depression and anxiety. I don’t think I was able to separate the two for awhile. It was a terrible place to be.

But I can offer you some hope. Eventually I became able to tell the difference in what I was sad about. I could tell if it was Cathy or just that wet blanket feeling of general depression. And was i anxious because I was expecting everyone I love to die. Or was it the free floating anxiety waiting for the other show to fall.

But it takes time. Be gentle with yourself.

[Iris72 in reply to LilyAnnepuppy]

It feels good talking to some people that actually know what I am feeling and going through its harder to explain to other people like my friends I will only tell certain ones what I am going through. but also I dont want to talk to anyone about my feelings because I feel like I am bothing them. Thank you!

[LilyAnnepuppy in reply to Iris72]

I use this site and a few trusted friends to be honest with. The rest of them don’t need to know.

[Ruthy24]

I know what it is like to have friends get tired of hearing your problems. I'm glad this website is here!