ive written on here a few times and you all have been so helpful. but here is one that my therapist and i are baffled by. a few weeks ago i had a couple days of horrifying, debilitating, life-altering panic attacks. two days of hell if you ask me. in response to couple new meds my dr put me on that i had never taken b4, and i firmly believe that cocktail of meds set me over the edge. that was after 1.5 months of sobriety after i quit drinking heavily cold turkey after almost 20 years.
after those two days of panic attacks, something inside me changed drastically. my therapist said its as if something became "uncorked" in me. which i agree with. Since that time, i havent been right. severe daily anxiety. on several new meds now. awful depression. darkness within me. on another planet. crying uncontrollably multiple times a day. always excited for nighttime so i can sleep just to be away from the awfulness of my days. can barely make it thru work each day. terrible constant fear, doom, hopelessness, deep, dark emptiness inside.
Has anyone had anything like this ever happen? I feel as though something chemically occurred within me- perhaps between the lack of alcohal, the meds, some sort of weird reaction in my brain? I have no idea, and no clue where to begin to search for answers. Do I start with my doctor?
I am always praying about this, seeking scripture, spirtually trying to find answers, but if something did happen on a physical/ bodily level, I am wondering if anyone has any insight or thoughts?
Thankyou🙏🏻
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leaningonjesus
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yes. my therapist said similar things to that. how do i feel and heal from 20plus years in the past? i guess alot of work on my part, counseling, meds... i have started the process but gosh... im a few weeks in and im beyond mentally emotionally physically exhausted, drained and like i cant go on this way.
if i may ask- can u tell me more (if u recall) about where you heard of this, the circumstances, what that person did , if or how they got thru it, etc? ❤️🌺🌻thanku
Congratulations on quitting drinking. It would make sense that you are depressed and anxious because you did stop suddenly after so many years. My guess is that it is temporary and yes, everything feels "uncorked" now, but when this episode passes you will be better off because you will be sober. I think you just have to make it through. Try to preserve your job and your relationships for a few more weeks and you will probably have a clearer sense of everything and your life will be better because you aren't "self-medicating" with alcohol.
Thankyou so much... ill be honest theres been times where ive said ugh i should have never stopped drinking! I listen to the lie of, "you wouldnt have these other issues..." etc. BUT i recognize the lies and push those thoughts away.
You saying its temporary does help- I have this constant fear I will be this way forever; end up in a mental institution or forever be a different person. Its awful and that doesnt help my anxiety.
Nonetheless- your words, and everyone elses, does help.
They say, “When you’re going through hell, keep going.” They also say when couples start couples therapy, they fight more! This sounds a lot like that- like the inner parts of you that are in a giant knot have untangled a bit and the knot is bigger than it was. It looks huge. But you gotta keep pulling apart the knot. It’s better than going back.
I think I might have felt like this. After learning about emotional literacy and boundaries. I remember that I felt like the Grinch (in Jim Carrey’s version) where he says, “I’m feeling!” It’s a great scene. Do you identify with that?
Now, the feelings to start are terrible f****** feelings. They are the reason we have bad habits, maybe. BUT... I stuck with learning and growing and practicing stuff, and it got better! I got new good feelings. I now know a lot more about good feelings. I wish you all the best!! 😀
Yes! Things always get worse before they get better.
I work with kids who have autism. If they’re perfectly comfortable, I’m not doing my job. If they’re having spikes of behavior here and there, I’m probably doing my job.
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