Me

I am feeling quite low lately. I am quite insecure about myself and feel as if i am deeply flawed.

[Hidden]

Hi and welcome! We will support you where we can. I'm sorry you're feeling low. Anything in particular troubling you?

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Hi. thank you. i feel as if i am deeply flawed , that everything is my fault. and my boyfriend would leave me because i get insecure often

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Everyone is flawed; it's part of being human. You've definitely come to the right place! I for one am insecure

.In regards to worrying about your boyfriend leaving you: have you told him your concerns?

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

yes I did tell my boyfriend about my concerns. Actually we haven't been able to talk properly from past 2 weeks and i am started to that he is losing interest in me. I asked him loads of times but he just got frustrated and doesnt understand why i am being insecure . though he has not given me any hint that he is going to leave me.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

That's great! Maybe you could tell him a bit more about you and your insecurities. I'm guessing there's background to you being insecure and he might appreciate some context.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

but whenever he senses that i am being insecure he gets annoyed . after all he is a guy and most guys dont understand girl insecurities. But still i will try to tell him the details. thank you

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

You're welcome. Good luck👍

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

i just get so frustrated when we dont talk for long it feels as if i am losing him. but then at the same time i dont want to be some clingy girlfriend

[JW621]

Set boundaries. We all go through it. Some days harder than other days

[Hidden in reply to JW621]

can you please explain what kind of boundaries i should set?

[Hidden]

Welcome Avan

Nice to have you here. Your post is not clear about your insecurities and flaws. But since you are a female I think it concerning ur looks which I don't think it true. Maybe you are too hard on yourself but I do not want to assume your insecurities are coming from that until I am sure. One thing I know for a fact is that if it has to do wit weight, u can exercise. If it has to do with luv, you can do better. I know insecurities can be controlled but then again I do not want to assume friend bcz u were not clear. Again, welcome to the group, you have joined a family which cares and is there to support

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for your support. It is about my nature I feel as if i am becoming a burden on the people who are close to me. I dont know why but i have been bottling up my feelings for long now.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Yah, now I get u friend

Joining this group for me was part of that. There are things you don't feel like telling certain people and they get to be too much in our minds and affects us. Have you ever heard people say, "once the cup is full, there is no space to put more water?" This means that you need to let somethings out and that is why we are here my friend. Have you voiced your concerns to those people? Maybe you are just feeling that. Please find out if your feelings are valid before you go crazy. I know those thoughts, they can paralyze sometimes

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you friend. I think I am paralyzed right now. My mind is just blank right now and I cant feel anything at the moment . But there is one thing I know that if I start talking about my feelings to my boyfriend I will start crying . I just dont want him to think of me as a burden. That is why I am keeping things to myself but it will be soon when my patience will wear me out.

[Marshall64 in reply to Hidden]

I was the same way in my teenage years. I was too insecure to even date. Guys are logical people, talking about emotions and things like that are not second nature like it is for women. He might be getting frustrated because he doesn't know what to say or do. Being logical, guys try to "fix" things and if they can't then they don't know what to do. If he is still there for you you he must all care for you.

I went to counseling and that helped as did my first girlfriend (first date was absolute terror for me).

Focus on your good attributes. You have a boyfriend, so there must be things about you that are attractive to others (more than looks). Try not to be too clingy. The more you get confidence in yourself the less you will find yourself doing that. If you have girlfriends, spend some time with them too. That will help balance your relationship.

[Hidden in reply to Marshall64]

thank you so much Marshall64 i was looking for insight into a guy's mind. thank you this helped a lot

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

That is true, ur patience will run out and you will have to. Can I give word of advice? when u do that make sure you are not harsh. Often times when we are quite about things they build up and when we get them out we destroy feelings. Since you are almost full, if you can write down ur points and deliver them politely u will be fine bcz u have to get it all out. In the meantime we are there for you here

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much i will definitely try this out. Hopefully i wont sound harsh and make him mad at me.

[swordfishll]

Have you read about attachment theory? It may help you understand why you feel insecure

[Hidden in reply to swordfishll]

I have never heard about it . can you please tell me what this theory is about? I am willing to try anything that can make me happy and give me peace of mind.

[utep99]

We are all flawed it is God that we get forgiveness for those flaws. Once you understand that God loves you no matter what you will feel a lot better about yourself.