Mom

[RosieSun]

I find it difficult to talk to my mom about how I’m feeling because she ends up feeling like she’s at fault or she’s a terrible mother. I don’t want her to feel that way, but I want to be able to talk to her about how I’m feeling. I just end up feeling guilty, like it’s my fault I feel like this.

[FearIsALiar]

I don’t have the best relationship with my mom either. She gets so worked up about everything. Whether that being the house is a mess or whatever else she’s got going on. My mom makes me feel like things are my fault or things are her fault. I can barely talk to her because she’s so toxic at times. I love her but it’s so hard because all she ever does is complain complain complain. I wish I could have an actual conversation with her…

[task2]

Good morning RosieSun! Have you tried explaining to your mom that you don’t really need fault finding, you just need her to listen to you? I very much wish that I had someone to just listen to me. I often feel, and have been made to feel, so different from everyone else that I just need someone to listen to me. To make me feel “normal.” Good luck with your mom! Please keep us posted

[Pamela2876]

I am sorry you are facing this. A mom really should be the person you can go to for support. I had a difficult time confiding in my mom she has very similar reactions. She internalized everything I was saying and when I was young I didn’t realize that was her dysfunctional way of dealing with problems. I needed someone to really hear me and acknowledge my feelings for me I learned that my mom couldn’t be that person in my life. I think it would be helpful for you to check into setting boundaries. You want to be able to let the good things into your life and the bad things out. There’s a great book called “Boundaries” by Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. I think this could be very helpful to you!! There are safe people to confide in! I hope this information is helpful you!

[SuZQ154]

So sorry! As Pamela said...our moms should be the people we go to for support. Her idea of reading "Boundaries" is a good one in my opinion because its suggestions are wise, practical, and Godly. That book has helped me many times with my mom and other family members.

Another strategy for me was counseling. Christian counseling provided an unbiased setting where I could vent, cry, be real, and get advice on how to handle my relationships and take care of myself in healthier ways. Would you consider counseling?

Hope this helps! Please keep us posted on how you are doing!

Blessings and hugs!