A Wife and a Mother in trouble - Anxiety and Depre...

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A Wife and a Mother in trouble

Shailja profile image
2 Replies

I realized I have depression and anxiety when I yelled at my 3-month-old daughter. I cried post that and tried to hold back my frustration of becoming a new mom. But every now and then it was taking over me. I have lived away from my husband due to my job in a different city and I had my daughter without his support. I always felt left out and not taken care of. Moreover, my MIL is a monster, she kept reminding me during my 1st 6 months of becoming a mother that how terrible I am at doing anything in life. It aggravated my anger and frustration.

Slowly my marriage started getting affected. We started having nasty fights every now and then. I shifted to my husband's city and we started living together for the 1st time since we had been married. There were days I will look at his face and will be filled with hatred. I started snapping at every little thing. My mind was always filled with negative thoughts about myself and everyone around me.

I reached out to one of my friends for support and she recommended me to go for medicines. I did and I feel better today. Not Best, but better.

I would certainly like to talk to people who have been through this.

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Shailja profile image
Shailja
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2 Replies
HelpingElbow profile image
HelpingElbow

Hi Shailja

I am sorry that this is happening to you. You seem to have been in an emotional rollercoaster. It's tough, I can understand.

You snapping at your 3-month daughter could have been a postpartum stress and it does happen to a lot of people. I am not sure if that was the case with you. It's alright, kindly don't blame yourself.

Who doesn't have a problem with their mother-in-law? :) It's hard to accept MIL as your mother. Likewise, it's even harder for them to accept their DIL as their daughter. Friction and turbulence does happen between we and our in-laws, but if it impacts us then we should probably not indulge much. Thus, saving ourselves from negative emotions.

Request you to take all the support you need. You said you take medications, but it's a temporary solution. You might have realized that already.

Please take care of your baby. I know it's difficult at the moment, but kindly try your best to not let your emotions come in the way of her upbringing. Please don't take this in the wrong way. Of course, you deserve all the attention, support and love from your family. However, I feel your daughter needs it more than you.

In your case, it's understandable to have negative thoughts about yourself and others, but if it impacts you emotionally, you should probably seek counseling.

Take care...wishing abundant health and happiness for you...feel free to ping if needed.

Lots of love...

Shailja profile image
Shailja in reply to HelpingElbow

Thank you for your support and kind words!

I have taken counselling and I am in a much better space. Even after all the emotional stress, I have given my best to my daughter. I understand how my situation can affect her. I have been lucky to have wonderful people around me to support me.

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