My anxiety reached it’s peak. It is showing more and more each day, especially with my boyfriend. I’m devastated. I can’t sleep, eat, work, live. I keep thinking whether he loves me or not. Despite all the good and sweet things he does to me, i only keep focusing on the negative side. I keep waiting him to call me all day, i pause my life infront of my phone! If he skips a nice word and doesn’t say it to me, i get anxious and start doubting his love. If a day passes without him calling me, i get anxious and ruin my whole day. I’m being tortured by my mind. I’m killing myself slowly.
Can you tell me what to do?
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Thealchemist99
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I know what you mean I recently moved in with my boyfriend and my anxiety about us can be so suffocating especially when he’s not home. Something I have done that may sound weird but really helps is dialogue me and my anxiety. I start typing what my anxiety is telling me not filtering it just putting down everything my anxiety is spewing then I go back and look over the arguments rationally and find there are so many loop holes in the scenarios of fears that it’s impossible for it to be true. Deep down you know the truth and that if a man could treat you so well and you could love each other so truly your fears will have no room to speak. Anxiety will always creep in and your fears will always call your attention but acknowledging those feelings and knowing that only the true you can determine the truth that your fears have no traction is very gratifying. Being able to finally laugh in the face of you anxiety and not the other way around because you are so sure of something is an amazing feeling. You got this!!!
I’m being suffocated by my thoughts and my BF is showing that he is annoyed and backing away from me. Today inhad a fight with him because he asked me “how are you instead” of “how are you babe”. And i slept frustrated because he didn’t call me at night, he was out at his friend’s house
Hello Thealchemist99. Sounds like these negative thoughts are extremely deep rooted, sometimes we are our own worse enemy when it comes to overthinking.
From a mans perspective the fact that he is doing sweet things for you pretty much means he really cares about you. If he stopped having feelings for you then he would most likely distance himself, so your relationship sounds really positive to me.
As for the excessive worry, have you seen a Doctor about it? If not I highly recommend that, as they could prescribe something to help calm your thoughts, you must be exhausted from all of the overthinking, you deserve a break 🙂
When I was struggling I found it helpful to talk about how i was feeling with someone who is close to me, like a parent or a sibling, maybe even a close friend, also I would write down every single negative emotion or feeling and read it back a few days later, that helped me alot. But it sounds like you may need to visit a gp, they may prescribe something called sertraline, it takes a few weeks to kick in but it helps to calm your busy mind.
Just remember that you will one day be free of worry, unfortunately it won't go away over night but if you take that first step then things will get a lot better with time, just have to be a little patient 🙂
Do you see a doctor or take any meds for that? It sounds like the excessive worry is ruining you. If not, there are books that teach you coping techniques for anxiety symptoms. Books on mindfulness are good. You have to get control of the negativity before it destroys your relationship and every one after that. It’s a bad habit, and if you don’t learn to control it, it will only get worse. Feel free to message me anytime if you want to talk more. I’ve become an expert at ruining relationships, so I know what NOT to do now ☹️
Don't answer the phone. Keep this inconsiderate moron in suspense. ...Who knows. perhaps he will take a different tack...... He is marginalizing you at your expense.
Why do you put up with this shit......become friendly with someone he personally knows.
Well I'm not the best person to be giving relationship advice, but hey, I'm up for trying!
This is what I'm thinking...
You can't just come out and tell this guy what you go through, because if you did, that would be exposing how much you worry, and that could be embarrassing to reveal.
But what you could maybe do, assuming this guy is telling you that he cares for you, is tell him that you appreciate hearing from him every day and ask if he will do that.
If he does, maybe you worry a little less. If he refuses, or forgets to do it... OK you will probably feel bad... but that's my suggestion anyway.
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