I recently came to terms with the severity and length of my anxiety disorder. I’m on the cusp of destroying my marriage, my family and my life if I don’t turn it around.
It’s all my fault and I have no one else to blame. I pray to the Lord to guide me through. My wife and kids deserve better. I’m so ashamed of all the damage I caused denying I have a problem. The last 2 years haven’t even been me, just rampant anxiety.
Hi marcus137...don't be so hard on yourself. Anxiety does and can happen to
anyone. It has nothing to do with what we did wrong but what we have been
handed in life that goes unaddressed.
You've certainly come to the right place where we can help support you because
we understand and care. Come talk to us whenever you are ready. We are always
here to listen. Welcome new friend. 
xx
I’m here to listen. ❤️
You have taken the first step towards recovery. You have decided to FACE the reality of your anxiety disorder. The next step is to ACCEPT the symptoms for the time being rather than fighting them. Fighting causes more stress, strain and nervous tension: the very things that fuel anxiety disorder. If you accept your symptoms you disarm them. You know they are no threat to your physical well being: they are sham feelings that do not exist outside of your nervous system.
So instead of doing battle with every supposed false thought learn to FLOAT past all those negative intrusions, imagine yourself being carried forward by some unseen force, continue with your work and leisure knowing that with the gift of understanding and reassurance you do not have to add second fear to the flash of first fear. Alas Rome wasn't built in a day, and your recovery will require you to LET TIME PASS. You spent a long time getting yourself into this state, allow a few more weeks, even months, to recover your quiet mind.
Face, Accept, Float , Let time pass: six words that have brought respite and recovery for three generations, not my words but those of "the woman who cracked the anxiety code".
Her name Claire Weekes, deceased many years ago now but whose legacy lives on in her writings and recordings.
You can get better. It isn't easy or quick but every step you take in the right direction is going to make you feel a lot better.
In time, they all add up and you'll be thankful you decided to work through it
Marcus,
You're being too hard on yourself. You're here among friends. We are all suffering...we are all ashamed and feel bad for our family and friends because of our ailments. You love your family...I hope you love yourself also. Are you seeking help? Are you working on yourself and trying to get and feel better?
I know it seems hopeless and you feel helpless more often than not. But you matter, your family cares about you and there is hope. I know. I'm on a better path, better than where I was months ago...I can't tell you the number of times I've apologized to my family...the ones that matter the most are still here...I see light at the end of the tunnel. Just keep doing what you need to, to get to a better place ..I sought therapy and this group here online....life matters, you matter. You can get better...you have to take 1 day at a time...do things different...not the way you always have. Life gets hard and lonely...no matter who you surround yourself with...but you're your biggest advocate! Only you can do the hard work to get to a lighter place...one where you can thrive...you have to work on yourself and love yourself first before you can love and help your loved ones. There's only one you..take one day at a time, plan your day, set goals for your day, and get up the next day see what you want your day to be..plan and set goals...anxiety is a nightmare...I have been anxiety free for weeks...changed my life...worrying about things you dont have any control over..can be destructive and can ruin your day...try and get over control over little things in your life...it empowers you to take back more control of your life..and start feeling..better about you and your days...reminding yourself of all your good qualities and why you are an awesome person...and remind you to love yourself. Please, take care of yourself...know that you matter and you are not alone. Have a great day 🌞
Thank you, I am in counseling, just got on some meds so we’ll see how it goes. I know the kids love me, my wife...lots of work to do
Youre welcome!! Yes, lots of work....but you and your family are worth it! It makes it easier for family to be our biggest cheerleaders when they see us trying....you got this!! Hang in there...you're awesome!
It's difficult to deal with anxiety and watch the effects it has on your loved ones. But you have acknowledged your anxiety and reached. Hope you are able to find a doctor and a good therapist to help you manage your anxiety. Please don't blame yourself. You suffer from a disease just like high blood pressure or diabetes. Sadly there is still a great stigma so it's easy to blame ourselves but doing that makes things worse. HUGS and BLESSINGS!
I let that disease run rampant and didn’t listen to my wife when she tried to help me get help. I know I can fix the anxiety issue, just hope I can heal the relationship.
Thank you for the hug
Hi,
You don't have to so hard on yourself. Marriage takes two people.
Free yourself from the rocky prison, then you will start to see things.
Pray for you.
You are definitely not alone. I have ruined relationships and I'm currently alone because of it. If you still have your family, then there's hope. It sounds like you're taking things seriously and willing to get help now. Just stick with it and be open to trying new things, even if they seem silly. The medication will help some but the long lasting healing is through education. Things like calming techniques and mindfulness are great starts. Therapy is great too. A therapist can give you direction on what to try since they have so much experience dealing with this. Don't spend too much effort beating yourself up. Your mind won't be able to learn new things if you're already feeling defeated. You can do this!
Hello, I'm New Here...
Hello, new member here
Hello, i'm new here. 
New here 
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